Second chances
by autumnleaves18
Summary: It is a risk to love someone. A risk that it is worth to take. Jason/Aria Jaria
1. Chapter 1

Aria turns skeptically in front of the mirror. What is she even doing here? On Monday she walked down the corridors of the Rosewood High without any person talking to her and now she is in a room with four other girls.

She is in a room full of clothes, perfume fragrances and the excited voices of the other girls, while she is silently watching the mess around her. Aria was surprised when Alison headed for her and the other girls followed her. Alison in the front and the other girls like faithful dogs always a small step behind her.

These girls laugh at every joke their leader makes. They don't dare to question a word she says. Aria doesn't want to match them. Nor does she hope that someone thinks about her that way. It has always been important to her that she doesn't depend on others and that she decides according to her own best knowledge what she wants herself. She also looks quite different and behaves differently.

She likes to wear black and has bright pink streaks in her hair. Alison, however, was the image of a Barbie: Gold blonde long hair, an already very feminine body and a heavily made-up face.

Alison enjoys to scare her subordinates. Aria is not keen on this. Although she only knows Alison since five days, she has already clashed with her several times. Aria won't keep silent when she disagrees.

She is surprised that Alison hasn't let go of her yet. She probably still thinks that Aria will give up at some point and that she can still break her. But Aria is sure that this won't happen.

But what is she doing here? Why did she let herself be talked into coming along? She doesn't want to go to this party. Maybe she isn't as firm as she thinks she is? Or maybe she wants to go this party and can't admit it to herself because it doesn't really suits her?

Parties of this kind take place every year in Rosewood. This she has already found out in school. The two Kahn brothers organize them in the cottage of their parents. The first party takes place at the start of the summer holidays.

Aria curses her headmaster, who got the stupid idea to send students to school before the holidays start. The headmaster believes that this way new students have the better opportunity to make new friends. Therefore they don't have to spend the summer alone and they have a better start in the new school year.

And now Aria will go on a huge booze-up. She tugs still uncertain at her top. Actually she looks like always. She is wearing black Chucks, a dark skinny jeans and a simple black top. Actually, she would feel very comfortable if Alison wouldn't constantly pull at her top because she thinks Aria should show more skin.

Besides, Alison was very generous with Aria's makeup. She looks like always, but older. Her long black hair is tied up in a loose ponytail. Loose strands and pendant earrings caress her face.

"Aria, listen to me. Stop pulling on your top", Alison tells her so that her thoughts are suddenly interrupted. "Trust me, there won't be just the little boys you know. You can't impress the men at the party with this prudish outfit. You have to show a little more skin", Alison says. Aria rolls with her eyes but pulls her top a little bit higher.

"What kind of a party is this?" Aria asks. She still hasn't figured out what she has to expect. It seems to be the best for her, if she is as well prepared as possible when she enters the cabin to reduce the shock.

"Noel and Eric Kahn throw several parties every summer. One is always right at the beginning of the summer holidays. Their parents own a cabin in the woods. Eric invites his friends that now all go to college and Noel invites his friends from high school. Just like us, and these little guys. But as I said there are enough older alternatives", Alison explains with a wink to Aria.

Aria isn't sure whether this preparation has really helped her. For her, everything still sounds after a booze-up, where young girls throw themselves at older guys. _You decide what you are doing yourself,_ Aria tries to convince herself again.

"So are you ready? Then we can go", Alison suggests. The girls get their handbags and follow their leader the stairs down. Aria is only shaking her head while she is trotting behind.

* * *

Even before the girls have arrived at the cottage, Aria hears the booming music that flows inside out of the boxes. She is the last one, who enters the cottage. It is exactly like she expected it to be.

The rooms that were certainly prepared properly once, already fell victim to the dancing crowd. Everywhere on the tables, shelves and on the floor large plastic cups are scattered. Most of them seem to have been poured over the furniture and the floor. That would explain the strong odor of alcohol.

In addition to the smell and the loud music, it is mainly the people at this party that are striking to Aria. The girls have only covered the absolutely necessary and dance seductively in front of the men who look at them as animals who consider their prey.

What has she done to herself? Alison is already saying goodbye to her friends while they are still standing at the front door. She says that she has to meet someone and that they should have some fun. Then she disappears into the crowd.

Aria has only turned around for a brief moment when she notices that the other girls have already disappeared into the crowd. She would like to go straight back. But since they came together, she has no choice but to wait until the others are ready to go.

She falls into the next empty chair. But the plan to just wait is easier said than done. Aria gets almost sick when she observes how the women curry favor men.

As Aria lets her gaze wander over the dancing crowd, her eyes stuck for a moment at a man, who stands behind the many people and is sipping on his beer.

She has to admit she hasn't only noticed him because he has the same bored look like herself. He looks incredibly handsome. He wears his dark blond hair short and his green eyes stand out to her. The simple jeans and the dark t-shirt suit him incredibly well and flatter his muscular body.

But Aria is interrupted out of her thoughts when a drunken party guest falls over his own feet and lands on her lap. "Sorry, sweetheart," he babbles. Aria pushes him annoyed and disgusted away from her. She really has enough.

She goes straight to the next door that she finds and slips into the room. When she turns on the light, she sees what room she has just entered: a storage room. Oh great! No matter, the main thing is to be alone and away from the crazy circus which offers her behind the door.

She falls to the ground and leans against the wall with a sigh. She has been hardly a moment alone, as the door opens again. Scared Aria puts herself upright and stares at the door gap when she sees his face. He quietly closes the door behind him.

Aria feels how her heartbeat accelerates. And she doesn't calm down, now that she can see who has entered the room.

"Wasn't this meant as a party where you have fun?" He asks Aria. "You've followed a girl, which hides alone in a closet. So you doesn't seem to enjoy this party either." She countered. "Point for you." He answers and smiles at her.

"Do you want to join my party?" Aria asks. He thinks for a moment, but then shrugs his shoulders, as if he has asked himself the question, what would speak against it and sits down in opposite of her on the floor. He also leans his back against the wall.

"I've never seen you at one of the parties." He notes. "I've never been at one. My family has previously lived in Iceland. "She tells him. "Iceland?" He repeats impressed.

"Yes, my father had a job there." Aria tells him. "Ok, but why do you go to a party, only to hide in the closet?" He still asks confused. "My ... um ... friends dragged me." She tells him. He nods, as if he knows exactly what she wants to say.

"Which college are you going to?" He asks. College? He thinks she goes to college? God, how much a bit of makeup and a low neckline can cause. Lie to him, Aria. He is obviously older than you. Lie to him. "Princeton. I study law." She suddenly hears herself speaking.

Hopefully he hasn't seen how much she is stunned by her own lie. How can she tell him that she would study law in Princeton? Her statement could not be further away from the truth.

"Wow, I didn't expect. So that doesn't mean that I think you're not smart enough for that, but I've thought that you would do something more creative," he explains. Aria just smiles. Also because he has judged her character so well.

"Do you want a drink?" He asks, holding his cup to her. He immediately notices her hesitation. "Oh underage and well behaved I suppose," he says, laughing.

"How old are you?" He asks interested. Aria notices how nervous she became again. Hopefully he doesn't notice. Lie to him. Lie, Aria. But not too much.

"I'm 19," she says, trying to breathe slowly. Has she overdone it? Could he actually think that she is already 19, when she is actually 15. "Ok, so I'm 21. So you'll drink under adult supervision." He says with a mischievous smile.

Even Aria begins to laugh. Especially because her lies weren't noticed and he really believes everything she says. But on the other side of her head his age still reverberates. 21. He's 21. She's 15. God, why Alison has to be right? Why she thinks that he is much more interesting than the boys at her age?

He holds the filled beer mug to her again and she takes a swig before she gives him the cup back. "So why aren't you with the others, but with me in the closet?" Aria asks.

He takes a sip from the cup himself and actually thinks apparently now about why he is sitting with her in the storage room and is not at the party among all the others. "The people out there don't interest me. One half are young high school children and the others are people I already know somehow and all of them are idiots or women who throw themselves at every man." He explains Aria.

Again his words are echoing in her mind. One especially. High school children. He has said. Young high school children. And she is one of them. Again she tries to breathe slowly.

"What are you doing here at the party then?" Aria asked puzzled. He briefly thinks about her question. "Free drinks," he simply says. Aria laughs and he joins in her laughter, so that she doesn't notice that his answer shouldn't be a joke.

Suddenly the door to the store room opens and one of the party guests stops abruptly in the doorway when he sees the two sitting on the floor. "Oh I am sorry. I don't want to disturb you. I just need a bucket for ... well you know." He stammers around. He gently meanders through their legs and takes a bucket from the shelf. He quickly disappears out of the tiny room.

"Maybe I should look after my friends." Aria says. Jason nods. He stands up effortlessly and gives her his hand to pull her up. Smiling Aria takes his hand and stands on her feet within seconds. She already holds the doorknob in her hand when he suddenly clasps her wrist to restrain her.

"Hey, what's your name?" He asks. "Aria," she replies in monosyllables. He smiles. "Aria," he repeats. "A very beautiful name. I'm Jason." "It was nice to meet you, Jason." Aria replies before she opens the door and leaves the room.

* * *

The deep bass of the music is blasting out of the box next to him into his ear. But it doesn't make sense to sit somewhere else. The whole room is full of people who almost drowns the music with their voices.

Young college students and even younger high school students who are all around him with cups in their hands or are sitting crowded on the couch. Young people who are smiling. Some out of politeness, some because they are actually happy to see their old friends again.

The whole time a girl next to him is talking to him. She constantly speaks of some teachers or classmates from high school he definitely has to remember. But actually Jason recalls not one of these names. As blurred as his memories are, so little clear is now his environment to him. The amount of people standing around him is an indefinable mass.

But then for a brief moment he has seen her in this indefinable mass. Only a fraction of a second is necessary so that she stands out of the crowd for him and now his gaze pins on her. So much so that it only takes another moment until he sees him standing next to her.

Noel Kahn, the brother of Eric. Although Eric invites him every time to these parties and he comes every time. He actually likes Eric as much as these stupid parties. And his brother seems to be no better. But is he actually better than these two? Can he really presume to judge them?

This question disappears immediately from his mind when he looks how Noel approaches a step towards Aria and now stands dangerously close in front of her. Jason stands up to get a better look. Contrite he sees how Noel lifts his hand and sweeps a strand of hair behind her ear. Jason's view focuses on it.

The flirtatious smile that had just been on her lips, has been gone for a split second and is replaced by a played and polite smile. So fast that Noel surely hasn't noticed.

But Jason has noticed it. And he has also noticed how much she flinched very slightly at his touch and how she took a small step back. Behind her, however, is immediately the countertop of the kitchen, so she can't really flee from him. Jason watches as Aria continues to smile nervously at him while Noel doesn't go a step back from her.

Determined, he gets up and walks purposefully towards Aria. He has no idea how he comes up with the idea that she won't smile at him as nervous as she smiles at Noel. He doesn't know, whether she won't find his proximity just as uncomfortable as his or that she won't give him a slap, once she is able to do it again. He doesn't know.

But as he stands in front of her, he doesn't hesitate. He grabs Noel from behind at his shoulder and pulls him back forcefully. Aria looks at him in astonishment. For a second insecurity is rising in him, but when he puts his right hand on her cheek, she doesn't push him away.

Instead, she puts her hands at his hips. Jason feels how she pulls him against her with little pressure. Jason puts his left hand on her waist and presses his lips without a warning on hers.

For a brief moment he can see her eyes widen and her body tense under his hand. For a fraction of a second he withdraws his lips, waiting for her reaction. The torn eyes are replaced with a wistful look that dispel his doubts.

Again his lips slowly approach her lips. When a whimper escapes her, he smiles amused. With an ease he picks her up and puts her down on the countertop of the kitchen.

Aria wraps her arms around his neck and notes how goosebumps spread to her entire body when he finally starts to kiss her. Aria forgets the people around them, as she feels Jason's warm hands on her back. When his lips loosen from hers very slowly, he grabs her hand and pulls her gently from the sideboard. "Do you wanna go outside?" He whispers in her ear. Aria nods as she bites her lip to suppress a smile.

Now Aria recognizes that Noel has moved away and looks angrily when they go to the back door, next to which he is standing with a group of people. "I think you bored her," Jason whispers to him mockingly.

* * *

She has been so stupid. The truth will come out in the end, her mother has always said. She should have listened to her. Because if she would have listened, she wouldn't be in this situation.

But because she lied, he stares at her now. He pierces her eyes with his angry, sparkling eyes, which demand for an explanation. She has been holding her breath, as she stood in front of him a few minutes earlier. She poured orange juice into glasses for breakfast when he walked down the stairs.

Unsuspecting she turned around and looked him straight in the eye. She has nearly dropped the bottle in shock. Jason's head ached and rumbled, but he was sure that this wasn't delusions of his brain.

Aria was standing in front of him. The girl he kissed all night. The girl, who invited him to join her in the closet. The girl who has told him that she is 19 and would go to college. But that wasn't possible. Not after he now knows that she's a friend of his sister. Alison may not know why he knows Aria.

Actually he wanted to ask her for an explanation the moment they met again. But now he sits diagonally across from her and pierces her with his eyes so subtle that no one else notices at the table. As Aria choked down the last bite of her bun, Jason jumps up. He doesn't care if he acts rude. He doesn't care that his mother calls angrily after him. He wants to go away. Immediately.

Aria waited some time before she has moved away from her friends out of the garden to go to the toilet as she told them. But that isn't the reason she has gone into the house. Instead, she is standing nervously in front of his room.

It wasn't difficult to guess which of the many rooms in the house Jason's is. The loud music that echoes out of the room into the hallway, has betrayed him. Aria knocks timidly on the wooden door.

"Who's there?" Jason asks from inside slightly annoyed. "It's me, Aria." She replies softly. Instead of asking her in, he flings open the door and stares at her. She would prefer to walk away now.

The Jason who is now standing angrily in front of her, has nothing to do with the man who she met yesterday. The one who has followed her into the storeroom, the one, who has saved her from Noel and the one, she kissed all night until she was dizzy.

Wordlessly Jason goes back a step to allow her to enter the room. Aria follows this call. "I'm sorry," she apologizes immediately, while she plays nervously with her fingers. "I'm sorry that I lied to you," she repeats. Jason doesn't respond but continues to stare at her angrily. His lips are pressed together in anger so that his lips are only a fine line.

"Did you know who I am?" Jason asks. Aria shakes quickly with her head. "No, I didn't know that you're Ali's brother", she assures him. Jason looks at her to see if she says the truth this time or whether she is lying to him again.

"So who are you?" He asks. "I'm Aria. I moved here from Iceland. But I don't study law. I do not study, at all." She says silently.

"How old are you?" He asks further. "Fifteen," Aria answers in monosyllables while she looks ashamed at the floor because she lied to him. "I'm sorry," she repeats again, but she knows that Jason hasn't forgiven her the lies yet.

"You won't tell anybody, ok? This is just between us and we will try to forget it." He says firmly. Aria just stares at him. She is sure that he liked it as much as she liked it. That he wants to repeat it. That the only thing that prevents him from kissing her are that his head and his mind are in control over his heart and his stomach.

Aria just stares at him. Now Jason is unable to classify her behavior anymore. She has to understand that they can't do this again, doesn't she? "We don't have to," she suddenly whispers at him softly. The previously small distance, Aria has even more reduced when she took a step towards him. Her hands gently lays on his chest. She lets them go up to his shoulders until her fingers are enclosing his neck.

Jason could just go back or push her hands off, but he doesn't. Instead he stares at her. "I don't want to forget. And I don't want to stop." Aria says softly. "I won't tell anyone. None of the girls and especially not Alison. But I don't want us to stop." She says.

"It can be our secret," she whispers into his ear now. Her warm lips move with light kisses from his ear down his neck. Jason closes his eyes in pleasure. Maybe she's right, it flashes through his mind. It can be their secret. No one will know, no one expect themselves.

She wants it. She suggested it herself. Then it is ok, isn't it? "No feelings, no fits of jealousy and not a word to anyone." He whispers as he has his eyes still closed. Aria smiles. She has convinced him. "Yes," she breaths in his ear.

"Promise," he asks her. Aria looks at him briefly irritated. Why is it so important? But if it is important to him, she is ready to give him this promise. "I promise," she replies. Jason doesn't hesitate a second anymore. He embraces her face with his hands and presses his lips against her reddened, soft lips.

 **So this is beginning of my new story. What do you think? I hope you did not find many grammar mistakes. But always remember, I am not a native speaker so please be nice ;D**

 **What do you think about the last episode of pll and Jason's return? I'm so excited to know what happened between Jason and Aria during the time jump. :)**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Aria can't sleep. She knows that it is absolutely stupid and exaggerated immature, but the thoughts that he is only a few meters further down the hall in his room and that he probably doesn't waste a thought on her, do not let her fall asleep.

With every sleepless night more, she knows that she has lied to him. She knows that she puts on that she only does it for fun for Jason. But there is no turning back. She doesn't want to stop seeing him. That wasn't a lie. But they also cannot take a step further because this would be too close to a real relationship.

No feelings. That was his condition. If he notices that she liked him a little too much even in that moment in which she promised this in his ear, he would certainly maintain a distance to her.

She just has to pretend that she also does it only for fun.

Nevertheless, this plan doesn't change her insomnia. She turns back the blanket back and gets up as silent as possible. Her bed is a simple air mattress that becomes flatter every minute.

She looks back again before she closes the door from the outside, but the four other girls are still asleep in their beds.

Each stair creaks, when she walks down but it remains silent in the house of DiLaurentis. No one seems to have woken up.

She walks into the kitchen and grabs a glass out of the cupboard above the sink. She is shocked by a figure beside her, which suddenly fills water into the glass.

"Jason!" She says louder than intended. She holds her right hand over her beating heart. "You scared me to death!" She complains. "How did you walks down the stairs so silently?" Aria asks puzzled.

"I've been down already. I couldn't sleep", he tells her. He couldn't sleep? Aria wonders to herself in thought.

For the same reasons as her? Because he constantly has to think of her? Because he immediately felt more for her? She tries to not get into these thoughts too much. She shouldn't talk herself into thinking he wants the same as her. He clearly said that he doesn't want more than fun.

"Hey come on, don't be so thoughtful", he interrupts Aria's thoughts. He takes her hand and pulls her a little closer to him. Aria offers no resistance. She stands so close to him that she can already feel his breath on her skin.

Aria fells how her heart beats faster. She closes her eyes as he places his lips gently on hers. Aria puts her hand in his neck and pulls herself up. A shiver runs down her spine when he presses his tongue gently against her lips.

She immediately grants him to fondle her tongue tenderly with his. Aria feels the tingling on her skin when he kisses her. A smile appears on her lips, which she tries to suppress in order not to interrupt the kiss.

Enjoying the kiss, she runs her hand down his torso. She can feel every trained muscle of his body under the T-shirt. But suddenly he contorts his face with pain.

Frightened and anxious, she breaks up the kiss. Without asking him, she lifts his T-shirt. Now she can not only see his trained abdominal muscles, but also a red-purple bruise, which is clearly visible next to his navel.

Carefully Aria puts her fingertips on the injured area. But before she can look at the bruise closer, Jason takes his T-shirt out of her hands and puts it down again.

"What's that?" Aria asks still worried. "That's nothing," Jason replies curtly. "Nothing?" Aria repeats his words. "It's only a little sport injury. No big deal", Jason replies. Aria looks at him skeptically.

She doesn't know if he did not just lie to her. "Did you go to see a doctor?" She asks. Annoyed, Jason lets his arms fall his body down. "I don't want to talk, Aria" He says angry.

"I want to have fun. I don't want you to ask me questions. That was the condition. So do you want to take back your promise? If you don't want it, if you want more, then say it now", he says.

She has to act together if she wants to spend time with him. She has to switch off her emotions. Much more than she thought.

Aria doesn't respond. Instead, she gets on her tiptoes and presses her lips against his. Relieved, she wraps her arms around his neck, when he returns the kiss.

* * *

Aria and Jason see each other every day of the following week. It always ends the same. They kiss secretly in his room, behind some hidden corner or at night at prearranged meetings in his family home. Sometimes they meet by chance, sometimes her heart skips a beat when she sees a message of him on her cell phone.

It's a sunny day when Jason sees her sitting off alone. She leans back against a tree and her legs are tightened, so that she can write in the book, which is lying on her legs.

He cannot help himself. Something draws him to her. He cannot just pretend that he hasn't seen her. He doesn't want to.

He knows that it is dangerous to go to her. Not to go to her itself. But to be seen with her. Many people in this park know him, know her, know his sister Alison. They wouldn't hesitate to tell Alison what they have seen. But he walks to her anyway.

Aria only notices him, when she sees his shadow on her book. Frightened she closes the book instantly and looks up. "Hey", he says smiling. Aria smiles at him embarrassed. Jason sits beside her and puts the basketball, which he held in his hands, beside him.

"What are you doing?" He asks her. "Nothing special," she says quickly. Jason is a little disappointed that she obviously doesn't want to tell him what she is doing. When he glances at her notebook, he reads the writing on the cover.

 _I knew I did from that first moment we met. It was…not love at first sight exactly, but- familiarity. Like: oh, hello, it's you. It's going to be you. Game over_

"Is this from you?" He asks, as he points at the quote. Aria looks at the cover, as if she has seen the quotation for the first time. She quickly shakes her head. "No, it's a quote from a book by Mhairi McFarlene", she replies.

"Why do you like it?" He asks interested. "Hmm?" Aria asks irritated. "Well obviously you like the quote because you wrote it on the cover", he notes. Aria looks at him for a moment quietly. Why does he ask that? He never asked her something like that. He never wanted to know why she does something or why she likes something.

Frankly, she finds it difficult to answer this question to him, because she thought of him when she read it. "I don't know", she begins to stutter. She can't look him in his eyes when she tells him. "Sometimes you read something and you just like it", she answers.

"Do you write yourself?" He asks. "Sometimes," she answers still looking away from him. "Right now, too?" He asks with a grin. "Yes", she replies softly. "What are you writing?" He asks her further. Aria is still irritated. He has never spoken so much to her.

Frowning, she looks at him. But he seems to be genuinely interested. "It's not really a story. I collect only ideas and write some scenes from time to time", she tells him. "Can I read one of these scenes?" He asks gently. "Not yet", she replies immediately.

She never would have thought that he would like to read what she wrote. That it would interest him what she likes to do. "Maybe someday?" He asks. "Yes maybe someday," she replies. "But not now," he repeats only noting not questioning. "No, not now", she also repeats.

Jason gets up and crouches on front of her and looks at her. For a brief moment Aria believes that he will kiss her goodbye, but then he seems to change his plan.

"Do you plan to meet Ali today?" He asks her. Aria knows what the question really means: Do I see you again today? Can I kiss you again today? But he can't admit that he enjoys spending time with her.

"No, not today", she replies simply. Jason nods, but Aria can see the disappointment in his eyes. Then Jason he gets up, says goodbye and leaves.

 **I'm sorry that it is a bit shorter than the last one. But what do you think?**

 ***Spoiler* And what do you think about Jaria in pll? Actually I don't know, whether I like it or not. I think they just want to please us shippers but in the end nothing changes. Aria will stay with Ezra and Jason will left heartbroken :( It broke my heart, when he told her that he cannot imagine anyone better than her.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

If the school year will go on like this, it will definitely not be successful for Aria. She is sure about that. It was the second time this week that the teacher admonishes her because she was daydreaming and looking thoughtfully out of the window. And today is only Tuesday.

Relieved, she sighs, as the ringing of the school bell releases her from the observing eyes of Mr. Banks. She quickly gets up and packs her things hastily into her bag. She can't leave the room fast enough. So she goes briskly out of the room, without waiting for the other girls.

But Spencer runs after her. "Aria!" She calls after her. Aria doesn't look back and she doesn't stop, but she slows her pace, so Spencer catches up quickly. "What's going on?" She asks as she has arrived at the same height as her friend. "What do you mean?" Aria asks, as if she doesn't know what her friend alludes.

"You're new at school. You have to show the teachers that you're smart enough to allow yourself such things", she says almost accusingly. Aria just rolls her eyes. Spencer concludes that it doesn't make sense to keep on at her. She should do what she thinks best. She told her what she thinks.

"Why were you looking out of the window so dreamily?", she asks curiously. Aria sweeps nervously a strand of hair from her face. "Um ...", Aria tries to think of an excuse as Spencer interrupts her thoughts. "Oh, is it someone from Iceland? Have you been with someone there?" She asks excited.

"Yes, exactly, he lives in Iceland. You don't know him. I just miss him so much", Aria lies to her friend gratefully for this template. Spencer looks at her sympathetically.

"I have to go home. But remember what I told you", she recalls Aria again before she runs in a hurry out of the building.

Before Aria even left the school building, she stops abruptly. The man who actually has been the reason why she was looking dreamingly out the window, is standing a few meters from her at the school yard and he isn't alone.

Aria frowns when she sees how Jason fights with his sister. She can't understand a single word. She can only see that Jason is very upset while Alison stands just in front of him and apparently doesn't care about a single word he is saying.

Even from the distance she can see how Alison rolls her eyes and waits annoyed until her brother ended his speech.

Finally Aria sees how Jason leaves his sister alone. She can see that he is still angry. But he seems to abandon his plan and walks away. She hesitates for a moment to be certain that Alison disappeared into the building and that no one is watching, until she hastily runs after Jason towards the parking lot.

She quickly catches up with him. So she can see how he gets into the driver's side of his Volvo. He is about to start the engine when she sits on the passenger seat. "Get out!", he says angrily. However, Aria remains seated. "Get the hell out!", he shouts at her again.

But Aria doesn't respond and also makes no move to get out of his car. "What happened? What were you fighting about?", she asks instead. "I'm not really in the mood to talk to you about it", he says. "Get out!" He says again angrily.

But Aria remains seated. "Ok, I told you", Jason says. He starts the engine. Aria eyes widen as he drives from the parking lot at high speed. But he doesn't slow down when they arrive on the street. Jason is racing around the curves and stares at the street without recognizing Aria beside him.

"Jason, drive slowly!" Aria shouts at him. Jason doesn't take his foot off the accelerator. Instead, he drives out of town on the road, pushing the pedal down even further. "Jason, you'll cause an accident! Drive slowly", Aria yells at him again.

But Jason doesn't listen to her. Aria is clawing her fingers firmly into the leather of the seat. Her heart is racing. Her hands are sweating and her fingers are cold. "Damn Jason, I'm afraid", she yells at him again.

Suddenly Jason turns his attention only a brief moment to Aria. When he sees her tensed body has stiffened in the seat and she stares at the street with fear in her eyes, he is startled. His fingers are no longer clasping the steering wheel. He takes his right foot off the accelerator and presses gently but clearly on the brake.

He brings the car to a stop on the roadside. Once the car isn't moving, Aria unbuckles herself and nearly falls out of the car because her trembling legs don't want to hold her. Angry and scared she runs a few steps away from him.

"Are you crazy? You could have killed us!", Aria yells at him. The fear that slowly drops from her, lets tears running down her cheeks. "It never happened anything", Jason murmurs silently. But Aria understood him and stares at him with her mouth open.

"Do you mean you have done this before?", she asks him. Jason nods. Aria shakes her head uncomprehendingly. "You will kill yourself one day, you know that, right?", she asks. "And if?", he replies. "And if?", she says repeatedly shocked by his words. "No one would care. No one would notice when I'm gone", Jason replies.

"That's not true", Aria replies. Jason doesn't contradict. Instead, he sees her still trembling knees and the tears running silently out of her eyes. Cautiously, he walks up to her. He gently puts his hand on her back and waits for her reaction. When she doesn't fight against him, he embraces her.

Aria buries her face into his chest. "I'm sorry", he murmurs as he holds her in his arms and kisses her tenderly against her hair.

* * *

Aria has slept badly for days. Once she closes her eyes, she has the feeling of being able to relive the minutes in the car. And it's not even the fear of her own life that keeps her awake.

Rather, it is the memory of his look he had when he raced along the streets, she can't forget. The complete indifference of his life or possible death, she saw that frightens her so much. Maybe she should stay away from him?

But one look from him in passing this morning was enough that she lied to her mother. She said she would go to Alison. One look has been enough and she actually walks to the house where Alison lives. But she's not there because of Alison. One look and she has told Jason's mother that she would wait in Alison's room for her friend.

One look from him and she immediately knows what he wants to tell her.

A look that asks her to spend time with him. Of course, just to have fun. Of course.

A look with a request that she can't refuse.

It will hurt so much. She knows it already. She loses herself more and more in her feelings. Nevertheless she knocks as quietly as possible at the door of his room.

Instead of answering, he opens the door as the day on which she was the first time at his door and he stared at her angrily. This time his eyes don't sparkle in rage. This time, he smiles as he opens the door and grabs her wrist to pull her to him.

As soon as he closes the door behind him, he presses his lips on hers. Aria smiles into the kiss when she staggers a few steps because of his tumultuous joy to see her.

Encouraged by his euphoria, her self-confidence increases. She lays her flat hand on his chest and guides him with gentle pressure to his bed. When he reaches the edge of the bed, he slumps. Aria straddles him and interrupts their kisses as little as possible.

Aria doesn't really know what she does. Just a few weeks ago she was just a fifteen-year-old girl who crushed on a boy from time to time, who was about the same age as her. She was so innocent like a fifteen-year-old girl normally is.

But now she doesn't kiss him like an innocent, inexperienced fifteen-year-old girl. If he wouldn't know better, Jason would think she wants to seduce him. If he wouldn't know better, he would think she isn't fifteen.

Their kisses become more intense. So much that Jason decides to stop her from challenging him too much. So intense that he decides he has to prevent them from doing something they shouldn't do.

With determination, he interrupts their kiss. But instead of stopping to kiss him, she places tenderly light kisses against the skin of his neck.

"Aria", he whispers to her with his eyes closed, "my self-control isn't as good as you might think." Aria briefly smiles and doesn't stop to kiss him.

Jason knows that if he doesn't stop her now, he isn't able to restrain her any longer. With an ease he frees himself from her and throws her gently on his bed. So fast that she stares at him in astonishment. Her breathing is still heavy and her heart beats wildly when he looks at her.

"We need to stop, Aria. We can't go so far. We've already gone way too far." He murmurs so silently that Aria almost doesn't understand the last sentence. But only almost.

Aria knows that it is useless to try to change his mind. She can see in his eyes that he fights with all his strength against his feelings. Actually, she is also relieved. Their passionate kisses were caused by the situation, in the moment in which she wanted to be near him. But she actually doesn't know whether she would be willing to be _so_ close to him.

Without resistance she drops her arms on the blanket. Relieved that she is no longer challenging his self-control, Jason plops down on the bed beside her. For several minutes they both stare at the ceiling of his room. Both unsure about how far they would have gone if they had allowed themselves to do it. Both unsure about how far they have already gone.

As Aria turns her head to the right, she looks at a sketchpad on his bedside table. Curious what she discovered, she takes the sketchpad to look at it in detail. Before Jason realizes what Aria is looking at, she already starts to ask questions. "Wow, you drew this?" She asks him.

She holds detailed drawings of buildings in her hands. She recognizes some of the drawings as images of buildings from Rosewood. But she is also sure that a part of them have to be his own designs. Each drawing was made with insane effort.

Embarrassed Jason rubs his neck. "Yes, they are from me. I know that they aren't very good and could be improved a lot", he stammers. "Are you kidding?", he is interrupted by Aria. She looks at him in astonishment. The drawings are amazing and he puts his talent down?

"They are really incredible", she assures him. "Why do you only draw buildings?" She asks interested. "I am studying architecture", he explains. Aria looks at him in astonishment. "What?" He asks. "Nothing. I've just realized that I didn't know that about you", she says almost apologetically.

Had she become so uninterested that she doesn't even want to know this about him anymore? Had she actually joined in his play so much? Had she just kissed him. A stranger about whom she knows nothing?

Aria flicks through his drawings while her eyes are getting bigger. In contrast Jason constantly tries to explain any alleged error in the planning or in the presentation.

"Jason, they are really good. You have no reason to be humble", she assures him again. "Do you really think that?" He still asks incredulously.

"Yes, of course. I would definitely give you the task of designing me a house", she confirms to him smiling.

Jason laughs. "Well, how should it look like?" He asks jokingly. Aria puts the sketchpad back into place on the bedside table and pushes him gently against his pillow. So quickly that Jason can't react.

Enjoying she lies down on his chest and surrounds him with her arm. This sudden nearness takes him by surprise. It may sound stupid. They met for weeks to kiss secretly, but to have her lying in his arms is a closeness that he isn't used to.

But he doesn't feel uncomfortable. Jason decides to allow himself this moment.

It won't hurt someone. They want it both. Then it's ok, isn't it? The conditions are quite clear. No feelings. Just fun.

Aria presses herself a little closer to him when he wraps his arm tenderly around her and she feels his heat.

"I just want a small house. A small house and a small, cozy back garden. I would like to have one like the ones in Sweden, in bright carmine red."

Jason looks at her in amazement. "What?", Aria asks. "Nothing, only I just didn't judge you this way." Aria laughs. "You will remember, I always do the unexpected", she says.

She is right. She really always does the unexpected. When Jason thinks about it for a moment he knows she is right. He never would have thought that she would suggest to meet secretly.

He had thought she would apologize a thousand times and then go as far as possible out of his way, because she would feel so embarrassed. But that didn't happen.

And somehow this is what attracts him to her. It makes her interesting, actually unpredictable. But he maintains control. He knows when to set a limit. Jason is sure.  
Jason listens to her interested when she tells him every detail of her dream home, up to the swing in front of the house. She talks nonstop, but not a single word of her bores him.  
In fact, he enjoys her company. And indeed it feels familiar after some time to hold her in his arms. So much that he isn't even aware that they both remain silent.

He notices that only when he also notices how he strokes the bare skin of her upper arm smiling and how he tenderly places kisses on her temple and inhales her familiar scent.

Suddenly she is too close to him.

Suddenly he has the feeling that they exceed limits that he wishes to respect.  
"Aria?", he whispers into her ear. "Hm?", she murmurs sleepily.

"You should go now", he says emotionlessly. Aria sits up and looks at him disappointed. When he sees her hurt look, he wants to undone everything for a moment. But he can't.

"Before Ali is coming home", he adds. He hopes that this explanation would make it easier for her. But it doesn't.

Nevertheless Aria gets up, takes her jacket and says goodbye with a monosyllabic "Bye", without even looking at him one more time.

* * *

Aria startles when she suddenly hears a loud rumble in the middle of the night. As her eyes adapt to the dark, she looks around her. Apparently all her friends sleep tightly in their beds. Apparently no one woke up by these loud noises.

Aria sits up and tries to find the cause of the noise. But in the room everything seems to be unchanged. Quietly, she digs out from under her blanket and tiptoes out of the room so that she doesn't wake up the girls. So silently as possible she goes along the dark hallway.

Jason's room door stands slightly open. Carefully, she pops her head into the room, looking for him. Since he has thrown her out of his room the last time, she has not seen him. But even without the light on, she is sure that he is not there. She goes back and opens the door to the bathroom.

When she enters the brightly lit room, she is frightened instantly. Jason is sitting on the floor on the cold tiles. Cosmetic products are lying around him on the floor, that most likely had their place on the shelf above the sink.

Jason leans his head against the wall and breathes heavily. Only minutes ago blood must have run out of his nose. Also his lip is still bloody. His skin under his left eye is all blue and swollen.

Aria immediately runs up to him and touches him gently on his shoulder. Only when he feels her touch, Jason opens his eyes. They are glassy and his pupils are tiny. He's drunk and stoned. Aria sighs softly.

"What happened?", she asks anxiously.

"We were in a bar", he says. "With whom you have been there?" She asks curiously.

"Ian and Garrett", he replies shortly. "And what happened?", she asks again.

Jason looks puzzled. "What should have happened? We drank", he answers annoyed. And smoke weed, Aria adds only in her thoughts.

"And then?" She asks. "What then? You ask me like you're my mother", he complains.

"No, that is not correct. My mother would never ask me anything. She isn't interested in anything I do", he murmurs to himself.

"Who hit you?" Aria asks impatiently. "No idea. I didn't ask him for his name", he says annoyed again.

"Why did he hit you?", Aria still wants to know. "God Aria, because I provoked him." Aria looks at him irritated.

"Why did you provoke him?" She asks. "Because I wanted to be punched by him." Aria swallows. He wanted to be beaten?

"Don't look at me like that!" Aria scares easily at the angry tone of his voice.

"Hmm?" She asks confused. "Don't look at me so compassionately, Aria. There is a reason why I didn't want us to continue…whatever we are doing and whatever we are. Now you know who you're dealing with. I'm sorry if you're disappointed. But I'm not your Prince Charming."

Aria takes a moment to catch herself again. Then he sees how angry she became within seconds. "What are you thinking who you are? And who am I? I told you. Only kissing, nothing more. No feelings", she hisses at him angrily.

"I'm not in love with you." _Oh yes, you are._

"Not in that moment, when we sat in that broom closet." Oh _yes, from the first moment ..._

"Not in the moment you kissed me. It was nice. I was surprised. But that's all." _That's not true. You went all goose-pimply and your heart started to beat wildly._

"I just worry about you, because that's what you should do if you see someone with a bleeding, battered face in front of you. _Not only. Also because you're special. To me._

"I'm not in love with you", Aria repeats energetically. _Yes, I am. But I don't want us to stop._

"Ok, ok, I've understood", Jason replies soothingly.

Now Aria is really angry. Not so much because he has accused her of breaking their agreement, but because he is right.

She is angry that she is actually in love with him. She is angry, because she was so stupid and has agreed to it. She is angry at herself because she has even suggested it to him.

She is upset because she still denies her feelings just to get hurt further more. And it is her own fault.  
She goes to the sink, wets a washcloth and throws it almost at his chest. She doesn't even apologize when he contorts his face with pain as the cold cloth hits against his reddened skin.

"You should wash the blood from your face", she says harshly. Jason thinks for a moment whether he should say something. But he can't tell her that what she wants to hear.

So he rubs silently the already dried blood with the washcloth from his face, while Aria collects the cosmetic articles that are distributed on the ground and puts them back into place.

With difficulty Jason washes the blood out of the washcloth and trudges down the hall to his room. As Aria enters his room, he already is lying under the covers, staring at the ceiling. "Are you ok?", she asks concerned.

She's still mad, but especially at herself. He nods. Just when Aria turns around and wants to walk to the door, he grabs her wrist. Surprised, she turns around.

"Aria, I know you deserve more. I'm just not the right person."

Aria doesn't respond. She just waits until he loosens his grip, and then she closes the door silently behind her from the outside.

 **I hope you like it. Please tell me your thoughts :)**


	4. Chapter 4

Aria doesn't need to turn around. It's enough to notice how her friends are gasping and looking shocked at each other to know that it is Jason who has just walked down the stairs and entered the kitchen.

Nevertheless she turns around hesitantely. As if he has just waited for her to look at him, his eyes immediately meet hers. So intense but so short that none of the other girls notices that he pays more attention to Aria than to the other girls.

Jason wears his training pants and a dark sweat shirt jacket over a simple, blue T-shirt. He pulled the hood deep into his face. Nevertheless you can still recognize his black eye and the cracked spot on his lip.

He already plugged the headphones in his ears, in order to be able to ignore every single word the girls might say. Even if they don't even say anything now. Instead, they still stare at him in shock. All of them except of Aria.

She is staring at him as well. But because she cares about him since she knows the story behind his injuries. At least what he wanted to tell her so far. And that's exactly why she worries about him. Why does he want to be punched?

But then Aria realizes that she isn't the only one who looks so worried at Jason. Alison stares at her brother with a stunned expression. Aria can clearly see that this look doesn't want to tell what a failure her brother is.

Aria can see that Alison actually is worried about her brother. That she wants to know what happened and not just rashly judges. But as he approaches her, it seems as if she wants to get rid of these worries.

Instead, she sees the expectant glances of her friends who want a reaction from her. And instead of running after him and asking him what caused these injuries, she only calls after him: "Tell me the name of the person I can congratulate!"

Jason doesn't answer her. He probably didn't even hear her. But he can imagine that she couldn't stop herself from telling him her spiteful opinion. He just walks out of the house and lets the door crash into the door-lock.

* * *

A few hours later, Aria walks down the hallway on the upper floor of the house to go to the toilet, when a hand suddenly reaches for her wrist and quickly pulls her behind the next hidden corner.

Arias heartbeat hasn't calmed down yet as she looks into Jason's familiar eyes. In the next moment, her eyes wander a whole lot lower. Only now she sees that he obviously just got out of the shower and wears nothing more than a towel that hangs dangerously loosely around his hips.

"Oh my God", Aria escapes before she slams her hand over her mouth. Jason's gaze still sticks to her face. He smiles amused at her reaction.

"Sorry, you scared me", Aria explains her spontaneous reaction. But she can hardly pretend that this has been the reason. This reaction came a little too late, only to be attributed to his sudden presence.

Aria has to concentrate so that her look doesn't wander down again and again. But in fact, it is not only his well-trained body, which always attracts her gaze, but also the multitude of bruises on his torso.

A whole series of them seem to have emerged last night. They are still blue-violet, while others are already brown-yellow and therefore must be older.

Gently she puts her fingertips over one of the new spots. Jason flinches slightly at her touch. But he grants her to touch them and doesn't try to hide his injuries or keep her from looking at them. How should he at this moment? He already needs the towel for other places…

"Why are you doing this? Why did you let them hit you?", she suddenly asks, looking up at him. Jason can see she is asking for honest care. He doesn't need to ask her if she still keeps their agreement. He can see that she doesn't. He can see that she is honestly and sincerely worried about him.

He should end it. He should tell her they have to stop. But he just doesn't want to. And he feels terrible about it. Because he knows she doesn't turn off her head while she is kissing him. Because he knows that she has feelings for him that she shouldn't have. He feels terribly because he will hurt her.

Gently he takes her hand from his chest and connects her fingers with his. Slowly he bends forward and kisses her tenderly on her lips. "Do you still want to meet in secret?" He asks. This time he doesn't speak in an angry voice. He is asking because he is concerned about her feelings.

He doesn't want to hurt her. But he cannot give her what she seems to want.

Aria nods wordlessly. "Good, but you have to stop asking all these questions", he says. Aria looks at him disappointed. She has hoped he would open up to her. But he doesn't seem to be ready for it. Maybe he will never be ready…

Aria nods again and walks further along the corridor.

* * *

Jason taps on his mobile phone as he sits alone in his dark room. Now and then, the phone vibrates slightly when Sarah, a girl he met at a college party, writes him. They hooked up and probably he would have slept with her if her friends had not said that they should leave the party.

He doesn't know why she is writing him now. Maybe she wants to repeat it. He doesn't care. Sure, at that moment it was fun. But he doesn't feel the need to meet her again. She was the same as the other three, four, five girls before. She was nothing special for him.

He feels like an asshole for thinking that way about these girls. But it is the truth. And apparently she doesn't want to be more than that, he concludes at least from her superficial messages.

Sighing, he puts the phone aside and sinks into the darkness of this lonely evening. He hates this feeling. The feeling of being alone. Bereft. Lonely.

He quickly reaches for his mobile phone again and almost wants to tap Ian's name into the phone to meet with him so that he can stifle his thoughts in the numbing sensation of the alcohol as the image of another person flashes on his mobile phone. Aria wrote him.

 **Hey, I can** **'** **t sleep? Are you tired?**

The moment he reads her message he cannot help but smile.

 **No, do you want to sneak out of the room and come over?**

If he would be honest with himself, he could admit that it isn't the anticipation of the distraction that lets his heart beat faster. It's her. Not just her kisses. _Her_.

Instead of hearing the vibrating sign of an incoming message, Jason hears the quiet creaking of his room door. He smiles when he sees her face.

Aria feels the tingling sensation in her stomach, which has become unbelieveable unbearable in the last few minutes. Just a text message from him lets her heart skips a beat. The invitation to come to him lets it pound wildly and her hands starts to tremble.

He sits on his bed and has laid the blanket slightly over his legs. The room is completely dark. Only to the right and left of his big bed, small back lit lamps burn that make him look incredibly vulnerable in the soft, warm light.

Jason stretches out his hand to her without a word. Smiling, she takes his hand and climbs into his bed. Jason lifts the blanket for her and places it gently over her naked legs.

To her surprise, he carefully puts his arm around her and pulls her closer to his body. Aria looks up at him in astonishment. Only now he puts his lips tenderly on hers and kisses her. But not as he has done it so far, impetuously and passionately, but tenderly and emotionally, as if he would welcome his girlfriend.

Aria wants to stop the time and capture this moment, in which she feels that she actually means more to him, and he also shows her this openly. She hopes that it won't stop, but she also remembers what he told her this afternoon in the hallway.

He doesn't want her to ask questions he doesn't want to answer. He doesn't want to open up to her.

"Is everything ok with you and Ali?", she suddenly hears him asking silently. Aria looks at him questioningly. "I heard you two argued this afternoon", he explains his question. Aria nods. "Yes, only the usual. Ali doesn't like what I wear", Aria replies.

Jason laughs softly. "Why does she not like what you're wearing?" He asks. "She thinks my clothes are too black, too prudish, too depressing. Whatever", Aria replies, twisting her eyes.

"Well, I like what you are wearing", he says smiling. Aria is glad that it is so dark in the room and that he can not see how her cheeks blush. Actually it really means a lot to her that he said that. She smiles at him a little embarrassed.

"It suits your character. And you should really not listen to Ali. In my opinion she dresses herself a bit too revealing for a fifteen-year-old girl."

Aria laughs. "You're her brother. You must be of this opinion. I think if she wouldn't be your sister, you'd think differently", Aria replies.

Frowning, Jason looks at her. "Hey, what do you think about me? I think girls and women who have more to offer can convince differently. And almost every girl has more to offer than her breasts or her butt. Many of them just don't think so about themselves. It's okay if a girl likes to dress sexy. Then she should do that. But none should do it to please a man", he explains.

Aria looks at him in astonishment. She really didn't expect that from him.

"Ali has also more to offer than that", Jason says softly. "I don't know what makes her dress and behave like that.

Aria can hear the concern for his sister in his voice. The concern he hides from every other person.

"I miss Ali", he says suddenly, and Aria can hear his voice tremble. "I mean, of course, she's there. But she acts like a completely different person. I hardly recognize her anymore. I just don't know what happened to her", Jason says into the silence of the night.

"Ali and I used to be pretty close. At night she climbed into my bed, when she was lonely or when she was afraid or she has came to me, when she was upset because of someone. And then suddenly she was different. Hostile. Cold-hearted. Egocentric."

It breaks Aria's heart to hear him speaking like that. In every word, she can hear the loneliness that surrounds him in this house with a mother who doesn't seem to notice that her son needs her, a father who doesn't show any interest in him, and a sister whom he seems to have lost.

"Ali worries about you, Jason", Aria says softly. "I saw it this morning in her eyes when she saw your injuries. I don't know exactly why she decided to play the cold-hearted sister, who only has to make a silly comment, but she cares about you."

Jason looks at her frowning. "I think some people are telling themselves that it is easier not to show others that they are worried and that they mean something to them, because therefore they can also convince themselves that the disappointment and pain these people cause aren't so big as well", Aria says.

She knows that with these statement she took a big risk. Jason is intelligent enough to realize that she hasn't just spoken of Alison.

But Jason remains silent. He doesn't say a word and shows no emotion. Aria sinks a bit lower and gently lays her head down on his chest. He doesn't push her away. He still holds her firmly in his arm.

For a while, neither of them says a word. Nobody moves. Both enjoy the silence and are immersed in their thoughts until both of their eyelids become heavy and their breath becomes more regular.

When Aria is about to fall asleep, she gets up and looks at him with sleepy eyes.

"I should go now. It's probably not a good idea if someone finds me in your bed tomorrow morning."

Jason nods in agreement, but Aria can see the spark of disappointment in his eyes because she is leaving him now.

Aria gets up and places a last kiss on his lips before she leaves the door and sneaks back into Alison's room without waking the other girls up.

* * *

Today she turns sixteen. A year less that separates her from him. She feels so stupid that this is her first thought when she wakes up in the morning. She should be happy, just be a happy sixteen year old girl.

It's stupid anyway. The difference in age is now as big as yesterday and as big as tomorrow. Nothing changed at all. Not at all. It's not a second less, not a minute, not one hour, and certainly not a year less.

Nevertheless, Aria thinks that it sounds better. But probably it doesn't change anything for him. Probably he doesn't even remember that it is her birthday today. She has mentioned it casually last week. He probably didn't listen or he forgot it. Surely he forgot it.

She squeals sleepily out of her bed and graps a sweatshirt jacket, which still lies on her desk chair from the day before and trudges down the steps of the stairs.

At the bottom, she can hear the babble of voices that fill the kitchen excitedly. As she enters the room, she still sees her mother blowing out the match with which she lit the sixteen candles on the cake.

Aria laughs as her parents, as well as her moody-looking brother sing her a birthday song. She is very enthusiastic about all the birthday wishes she get from her family.

"Now unpack your presents", her mother says joyfully and makes way to the table, where lovingly packaged parcels lie. Aria is delighted with every single one: The filigree leather bracelet, the book she wanted to have and the concert tickets. Two tickets for Jamie Sloan. Perhaps she would ask him to go with her? At this thought she begins to smile so that her mother looks at her strangely.

"What are you thinking about?", she asks in wonder what caused her daughter's sudden, dreamy smile. "Nothing", Aria answers monosyllable. Ella just shakes her head laughing.

"You got another gift", she says. Aria looks at her questioningly and looks around in the room. "Where is it?", she asks. Ella goes back into the hallway and reaches for the big, flat parcel, which was leant at the house wall this morning. "Here", she says, handing it to her daughter.

"Who is it from?", she asks. "I don't know it was standing on the veranda. There is no sender written on it. Maybe you'll know it when you'll have unpacked it", Ella suggests. Aria nods and carefully folds the paper apart.

Without seeing the front, she can see that it is a painting. As she turns around the canvas, she gasps. She stares at the picture that someone has painted for her. Immediately when she saw it, Aria knew that Jason did it for her.

On the canvas is exactly the house pictured, which she described as her dream house a few days ago. He has captured every detail just as she has imagined it. He has exactly listened to her. He had soaked in every single word and made the effort to give her this special gift.

"Wow", her mother says as she peers over her daughter's shoulder. "Somebody made great effort for you", she notes. "Who is it from?" Ella asks curiously. "Um, I don't know", Aria lies.

Ella looks doubtfully at her daughter. "There is no name on the canvas and a card wasn't there, either, right?" Aria asks as if she doesn't know who has been the sender of this gift. "No", Ella answers. "Perhaps it was one of the girls", Aria suspects. "I'll ask them", Aria says, disappearing into her room with the painting.

There she graps her cell phone and dials his numbers with trembling fingers. It rings only three times until he answers the phone.

"Yes?" He asks. Aria hesitates briefly, because his voice sounds annoyed.

"Hey, it's me, Aria."

"Oh hey, happy birthday", he congratulates her.

"Thanks", Aria answers monosyllable. She is insecure that he is so tacitum.

"Thank you for your gift. I don't know what to say. It's amazing. Exactly like I'vealways imagined", she says.

"Oh yeah? It wasn't a big deal. But I'm glad you like it", Jason replies.

Aria feels the disappointment rising in her. "Yes, it is really incredible", she assures him again.

They both don't say a word for quite some time. "Ok, Aria, I have to go ahead. Bye", he says, finishing the conversation before she can respond.

Aria doesn't understand him. Why has he been so cold now? He has made so much effort and gave her this very special gift and now he acts as if it is nothing.

Jason holds his hand tightly around his mobile phone for quite some time. If he doesn't do it, he would probably throw it against the wall and let it simply break it into pieces.

After Aria disappeared out of his room a few days ago and he felt this emptiness and longing for her, he had decided that it was time to take a little distance from her.

They have an agreement, and as much as he has reminded her not to care about him, he realizes that he himself is about to break it. And that's not right. He doesn't want that.

Nevertheless, he feels like a huge asshole now. How should she understand him? He sits for nights on end to give her this gift in painstaking work and then he can't even congratulate her on her birthday the way he would actually like to.

 **Sorry it took me a while... What do you think about the new chapter?**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

Jason hesitates as his right hand already rests on the door-handle of the old wooden door, which he only needs to open to enter the smoky, dirty pub. Just as he has done yesterday and the day before yesterday and the day before that day and before...

For the first time he stood in front of that door the night after he had thrown Aria out of his room and had forbidden himself to call her, write her, or even think about her.

Before that, he hasn't drunk a single sip of alcohol for three days and hasn't smoked pot. He had no desire to do it at all.

But today he won't make it again. Today he is back in front of the well-known door and knows that he won't turn around. He knows he won't do it again tonight. And actually he also knows why he has stayed sober for three days.

He has seen _her_ every day. Actually, he drowns his sorrows in drink less frequently since he first met her in the storeroom at the party.

To be with her fights many of the emotions that keep him coming back to that door. The loneliness, the rage, that it just doesn't get better and the desperation that it just will never get any better.

He could choose another way, as to go through the door and sit down at the bar. He could call her and ask her if she wants to see him. He could apologize for being so short on the phone.

But the truth is he just has such a damn fear of doing just that. Because that would mean that it is actually true. That she really makes his life better.

He sighs heavily and puts his hand back on the door latch. He knows that he won't go to see her. No matter how long he hesitates in front of this door. He knows that at the end of these doubts he will be sitting at the bar and the cold whiskey will flow down his throat.

Because it's easier than to be with her and to deal with the feelings that he is trying to deny over and over again.

He shakes his head as if he could just shake her out of his mind. The picture in front of his inner eye ... her softly falling curls ... her clear, brown eyes ... her encouraging smile ... her warm hands on his skin ... her soft lips on his ...

God, what's going on with him? Without hesitating another moment, he pushes the door-handle down and enters the bar, determined to forget everything. The strong smell, which others probably would immediately notice, he doesn't perceive at all. Too often he has already entered these rooms.

The bar is almost empty but it doesn't matter to him anyway who needs to drown their frustration. He doesn't pay attention to any of them. Jason walks straight to the bar, sits down on the stool and wraps the glass of the brown liquid that the man behind the counter has immediately placed in front of him.

You know you've sunk really low when the bartender already knows what you want to order before you even have said it. If he only sees you and knows that you don't want to talk, you just need the alcohol.

And it doesn't stay with that one whiskey. He orders one another and another and another. Again, he doesn't even have to open his mouth until a filled glass stands in front of him. It is simply enough to raise his finger briefly to ask him to fill the empty glass.

And with every glass he tries to convince himself that she just can't see it. He is not good enough for her. For anybody at all. What does she see in him? He just wants to make out and she shouldn't care about anything else.

He doesn't need her. He doesn't need anyone. Because nobody wants him. At least not very long. And therefore he raises his finger again to drink the next whiskey. Because anyway, everything doesn't matter.

* * *

Emily is the only one who knows of Aria and Jason. In a heedless moment of the two, Emily has seen him pushing her kissingly against the wall of his room, while the door stood a wide gap open.

Emily didn't say anything. She only stood there with her eyes opened wide with surprise and held her breath. Without the two of them noticing, she has gone back to Alison's room flushed and went to the other girls and tried not to show or say anything.

It was not until the late afternoon, when the girls left Alison, that she wanted to walk a few steps with Aria, although the house of her parents is in a completely different direction. She has used several attempts to actually ask Aria about the situation she has observed.

She hasn't known Aria for that long yet and she was afraid how Aria would react. She wondered if Aria would get angry because Emily observed her or would she be ashamed? Emily has thought maybe to say nothing and to pretend that she hadn't seen anything. Just to avoid to ruin their friendship.

On the other hand, Emily thought Aria needed someone to talk about her feelings. Someone whom she can trust. Finally, she had overcome her doubts and made the decision that it was the right thing not to pretend she didn't know.

"Aria ... I don't really know how to tell you ... how to ask you this, but I want you to know no matter what it is. No matter what it explains, what I've seen, you can tell me. I won't tell Alison and no one else if you don't want that." Emily has begun her question. Her heart pounded to her throat because of her fear of Aria's reaction.

Aria noticed herself that her heart beat faster and she just stared to the ground so that Emily couldn't see how nervous she became.

"I saw how you kissed Jason ... how he kissed you ... how you both kissed", Emily blurted out, feeling the relief as she finally said the words. Aria remained silent and stared at the ground. But instead of continuing to walk, she had stopped.

"That wasn't your first kiss, was it?" Emily asked cautiously. Aria shook her head without a word.

"Are you two ... a couple?" Emily asked hesitantly. Again Aria shook her head.

"No ..." Aria finally said and sighed. "I don't really know what we are myself", she murmured softly.

Frowning, Emily looked at her. "What do you mean?" She asked. Aria thought for a moment if she really should tell her friend what she was up to with Jason. She promised him not to tell anyone about it. But she was just really suffering. Actually she was glad to finally have an opportunity to pour out her heart.

"Jason and I have the agreement that it's just about the fun. Just kissing. No more. No feelings. I had to promise him not to fall in love with him. That's the reason why he spends time with me", Aria explained wistfully her agreement with Jason.

Emily laughed a bit. "This doesn't seem to work", she noted. Aria sighed. "No, it didn't. But he always pushes me away. One question too much that crosses his boundaries and he stops talking. Maybe I'm talking myself into thinking he actually likes me, but I don't think he doesn't care about me at all", Aria replied.

"Are you kidding?" Emily asked shocked. "Everyone with eyes in his head, can see that he cares about you. The way he kisses you and looks at you. I've no idea why he can't tell you, but this man definitely has feelings for you", Emily stated.

Aria looked surprised. "Do you really think that?" She asked in astonishment. "Yes", Emily assured her friend. For a moment, she looked at Aria and saw the uncertainty in her eyes.

She is surprised that Aria doesn't seem to notice it herself. She had actually known her as very self-assured girl. But Jason seems to show another side of her.

"Aria, have you ever kissed someone you weren't in love with, for whom you felt absolutely nothing?", Emily asked her friend. Aria shook her head embarrassed. They didn't know each other long enough so Emily couldn't know that the kiss at the party between Jason and her, has been Aria's first, and there hasn't been anyone else besides Jason.

"Ok, so I've kissed someone I had absolutely no interest in. And I've only done it once. After that I had no need to repeat it. If Jason had no interest in you, he wouldn't want to kiss you again and again", Emily explained her words with perfect confidence that she was right.

Aria thought about the words of her friend for a while. She was right. They kiss each other at every opportunity. No matter if they made an appointment or if it was just a fleeting kiss in a random encounter. And every single kiss he seems to enjoy.

"And besides", Emily hesitated, looking at Aria grinning, "he's six years older than you. Do you think if he wouldn't care about you, he would be content just to kiss you? Don't you think he has had a little more experience? But it seems to be ok for him, because it's not just about the kiss, but also about you", Emily assured Aria again, smiling as she saw a smile on the face of her friend.

This conversation has already been a week ago and Emily is dying for some news about the status of the relationship between Aria and Jason. That is why she didn't go into the water of the lake with the other girls, but stayed with Aria on the hot sand and in the glowing heat of the sun.

Aria barely said a word all afternoon. Emily isn't sure if this is a bad sign and her friend is somewhat depressed. But Aria doesn't expose much details about her relationship with Jason anyway.

Emily can hardly read anything in Aria's face. She hasn't taken the sunglasses off all day and even if the other girls don't seem to care, Emily has the feeling that Aria doesn't take them off on purpose.

"How's Jason?" Emily asks and thinks she's asking a quite harmless question. But she has watched her friend closely while asking this question and saw her body tensed instantly when Aria heard his name.

"No idea", Aria replies briefly. "You don't know?" Emily asks again. "No", Aria replies again, sounding almost pissed at her friend for mentioning him. "Did you two had an argument?" Emily asks cautiously. "No idea", Aria answers again without an explanation.

Emily waits for a moment because she hopes her friend will decide to tell her what happened and why she reacts so sensitive to the subject. But Aria remains silent.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Emily asks, hoping that Aria won't be angry at her because she crosses her boundaries. But when Aria wants to talk, Emily wants to be there for her. If she doesn't want to say anything, then she respects that, too.

In fact, Aria tells with a trembling voice about the gift he gave her to her on her birthday and about the phone call afterwards, when she wanted to thank him and he pretended as if it had no meaning for him. She hasn't spoken to him since then and her birthday was five days ago. "What are you going to do now?" Emily asks curiously.

"Nothing", Aria answers monosyllable. "Nothing?" Emily repeats questioningly. "Yes, nothing. Either he calls me himself or he doesn't want to speak to me at all. Then it's over. It's that simple", Aria replies bitterly. "Are you sure it's so easy for you?" Emily asks skeptically.

For a moment, Aria says nothing and Emily knows she has expressed the problem. Of course, it isn't that easy for her. She is in love with him, obviously, and of course it hurts although she pretends she doesn't care. "No, it's not. But I'm sick of it", Aria suddenly replies angrily.

"Maybe we were both wrong. Perhaps it doesn't bother him that he doesn't hear from me because he really doesn't care about me or I am really just a pastime. But I can't do it anymore. I don't want to wait for him every day. I don't want to miss him every day." Quickly, Aria wipes the tears from her cheeks.

It breaks Emily's heart to see her like that. Although Aria has only recently been her friend, she feels deeply connected by the secret that she holds for her. "I'm sure he misses you too, Aria", she murmurs softly and puts her arm around her.

"But I think you're right. You shouldn't always be the one who takes a step towards him. At some point he won't be able to stand it, Aria. It is just hard for him to admit."

 **I am so sorry it took me so long but I am not forgetting about my stories. I hope you like it. I know nothing really happens but I just think it is important to give a little inside look in their feelings. Tell me what you think and please do not hate me for my bad English :D**


	6. Chapter 6

Seven days have passed. Not once did he call her, not once did he write her, let alone he'd ever seen her. But he is constantly and always thinking of her. He has tried to drown his thoughts of her in drink. A futile attempt.

He is already completely drunk and stoned as he enters the club. Ian has persuaded him to leave the house and the couch, where they had been sitting all evening and drank one glass after another. He doesn't really want to meet other people. They're all the same to him.

As he enters the club, the bass of the music penetrates his body. The smell of alcohol and sweat rises into his nose and the people push themselves past him. Immediately he knows why he would rather stay at home.

He hates them all. He hardly knows any person here and still feels hate for all of them. He doesn't want to talk to any of them. None of them is really interested in just one word that he has to say.

They always nod in a friendly way and smile at him, although they haven't even heard a word because of the loud music. And when he meets them a second time, they come running towards him, as if they were close friends who haven't seen each other for a long time.

And for that he hates people. They manage to make him feel absolute and completely lonely in a room full of a celebrating crowd. And time and time again he catches himself searching for her in the crowd, although he knows she isn't even allowed to be here.

Every day he walks through the town and holds his breath when he sees any woman with dark falling curls, because he is afraid to meet her again and to see in her eyes that he has hurt her. And since he forbids himself to think of her, he also hurts himself.

But he can't find any other way but to go in the direction of the bar without hesitation and to order the next drink.

He supports himself with both arms on the counter to stabilize his stand. Actually, he shouldn't drink any more. He already has drunken more than enough. But if he still thinks about her, it can't be enough.

He only lifts the pointing finger and tells the bartender that he wants to order a vodka. The bartender looks skeptically at him for a moment. But ultimately he takes a glass, puts it in front of him and gives him the clear liquid.

Jason takes a big sip when suddenly a blonde woman appears next to him. She leans against the counter and clasps the wood with both hands. "Hey", she whispers. Jason turns to look at her for a moment.

The first thing he notices is her cleavage. She stretches it so much to him and her top is so low-cut that he can't even overlook it. His eyes wander to her face and he thinks for a moment whether she should be known to him. But the truth is, he has no idea. Maybe he saw her before, maybe she's a completely strange person. He can't remember and he doesn't care.

Jason rolls only with his eyes and turns his gaze away from her, almost disgusted by the way she crawls to him. Too often, he has responded to these advances. Too often, he was making out with some woman in a corner. Then he went home with her and slipped out of her apartment before the woman woke up and could realize that he didn't stay. Every time he felt even worse than the evening before.

"I've seen you here many times", she says. The blonde woman bites her lip, which seems to have the purpose to seduce him. He is already annoyed by her. "Oh, yes?", Jason replies questioningly, without looking at her again or turning to her.

"Yes, an attractive man like you attracts my attention", she whispers to him, leaning forward a little further. "No idea what that says about you, but I've never noticed you", he whispers to her and regrets that comment the next moment he sees her face.

He isn't interested in her, but he shouldn't have said that. He could have told her in another way that he isn't in the mood to flirt with her. The comment was mean.

"What is your problem? Are you gay?" She asks angry. Now Jason doesn't regret his comment so much. Sure, he has still been unnecessarily mean to her, but that she assumes that the only explanation for his lack of interest in her is that he is gay, makes him laugh a lot.

"Do you have a girlfriend?" She asks when she realizes that her first suspicion isn't true. Jason laugh stops immediately. The blonde grins at him. It's because of another woman. This is immediately obvious to her.

"Give my regards to her. I hope you aren't such an asshole to her. Because if you are, I hope she realizes that soon." Before Jason can reply anything, the blonde woman disappears into the crowd and Jason turns back to the Vodka.

Now she dominates his thoughts even more. Whenever he closes his eyes, Aria appears in front of his inner eye and he can still hear the disappointment in her voice when he has been so cold to her.

He never wanted to feel like he does now. He never wanted to care about what she is thinking and feeling because he never wanted her to be disappointed when he doesn't call her and when he doesn't have time to see her. She shouldn't care about him. And he shouldn't either. It should be different.

Not even the alcohol can get her out of his mind. Today he planned to just forget her. Instead, he has the feeling that he is thinking about her all night. Desperately he buries his face in his hands.

"Hey", a voice says silently beside him. "You look like you need one of these", says the man next to him. Unobtrusively, he shows him a transparent bag of three small colored pills. Jason looks up at him. He has seen him here many times, but he never knew he is a drug dealer.

So far he had never used harder drugs. The alcohol and the marijuana have always been enough to suppress his feelings.

But today, without hesitation, he reaches for the bag and puts it in his pocket. "How much do you want for it?" He asks. "50 dollars", the stranger whispers again. Jason pulls a note out of his wallet and puts it in front of him, before Jason quickly walks away from the dealer.

More than ever, he can hear her desperate voice in his ear as he sits down on the toilet in one of the cabins. Her pleading shouts, which want to prevent him from taking this pill.

But he doesn't want her to be the way out. With trembling fingers and blurred eyes he looks at the pill before he puts it on his tongue and swallows it.

* * *

The sun is shining in Arias face, but it could also be raining. For the past ten days it didn't make a difference to her. Every day she feels the heavy feeling of missing and who says time heals all the wounds is lying.

Aria has the feeling that the longing for him only grows bigger every day. For ten days no news, no call, nothing. She doesn't know whether he is doing well or badly. She doesn't know if he doesn't care or if he feels as bad as she feels.

For days, she has been struggling to smile and follow the conversations of her friends, so that they don't start asking questions she doesn't want to answer. Constantly her thoughts revolve around him and again and again she hopes that he will call her.

But nothing. Absolutely nothing. "Aria? Ariaaa?" Only when Spencer touches her friend lightly at the shoulder, Aria realizes that her friends were talking to her. "What?" She says with a played smile and pretends she hasn't been absent for minutes.

"Hanna wants to know if Noel has ever tried to contact you again", Spencer explains her friend the topic of the current conversation. "Noel?" Aria asks confused. But then she remembers that the girls get out of her in her first days in Rosewood, that she thinks Noel is attractive.

In addition, they know that Noel hasn't left her side at the evening of the party, which she particularly well remembers. And although there have been some people around them, when Jason kissed her, the girls still don't seem to know how the evening has been going on for Aria.

Quickly, Aria recovers as she looks into the expectant eyes of her friends. "Yes, he does write me sometimes..." Aria says in a hurry, hoping that this topic is done with her answer and that she won't get caught lying.

Alison just wants to ask another question when Emily rescues her. "Hanna, is there anybody you are interested in?" She asks curiously. When all the eyes turn to Hanna, Aria smiles at Emily gratefully and forms a silent thank you with her lips.

Aria doesn't even hear Hanna's answer. She got distracted by Alison's mother, who storms out of the house. She looks very angry and walks quickly to the girls.

"Alison", she shouts as she is still a few steps away. Immediately, Alison turns around and looks at her mother expectantly. She doesn't even seem to mind the anger in her mother's eyes.

"What's the matter, Mom?" Alison asks. "I have to go now. Can you please tell me if your brother will leave the house or invite anyone?" She asks her daughter strictly and without further explanation.

Alison nods and responds with a simple "Sure". Jessica Dilaurentis walks just as fast as she has come back to the inside of the house. Alison looks after her mother for a long time. Aria can see in her face how happy she seems to be because her brother once again seems to be the black sheep, even though Alison knows also every trick in the book.

All the girls know her smile all too well, which they can see when she turns back to them. "What's the matter with Jason?" Emily asks finally and again Aria wants to embrace her on the spot. Emily had clearly seen that Aria wanted to ask the same question. But the fear that Alison would wonder about the questions and would become suspicious is too big.

"No idea. He gets drunk every night for over a week. My mom wants to prevent that this happens again today", Alison explains. She covers up any care that she might feel for her brother perfectly.

Aria holds her breath. _He is drinking for over a week. It's been over a week since she'd heard of him the last time._

* * *

She is standing at his door and doesn't know if she should hate herself for it. She wanted to wait for him. She didn't want to give in again and take the first step towards him. But now she stands again in front of his locked door and knocks with trembling fingers against the wood.

Instead of simply asking the person standing in front of the door in, Aria can hear his steps in the room moving towards the door. With an unpleasant sound, Jason pushes the door latch down at the other side of the door and pulls at the door to open it.

Aria's heart is in her mouth. She hasn't seen him for ten days. Ten long days and each day she missed him. His breath on her skin. His soft lips on hers. His gentle kisses on her neck. _And him_. Above all, and not to be denied.

Aria's breath stops when she sees his face. He has never looked so bad in almost two months that she knows him. And that isn't even because of the black eye or the swollen nose.

His eyes are empty. Sad and empty. He looks tired. And unhappy. The moment he looks at her, she can see something sparkle in his eyes. But she can hardly describe it. It was only to be seen for a second before he lowered his head so she couldn't look directly at him.

Neither of them says a word. Jason already knows what she thinks. He only needs to look in the mirror to see how terrible he looks.

He wanted to avoid her, but now as she stands in front of him, he doesn't want to slam the door in front of her. So he takes a step out of the way and nods slightly towards the room.

Aria enters slowly and looks around in the room. His room was never tidied. But so far, it has always been a disorder that brought life into the room. This time, there are open, empty bottles and clothes that make his room look messy.

When Aria turns to him and looks at him questioningly, Jason has sat down on his bed, resting his head on his hands. She has never seen him like this before. So vulnerable and broken.

Without saying a word or asking for an explanation, she kneels in front of him. Jason's head is lowered. He can't look at her. He knows what he would see in her eyes, if he dared to look at her for a moment.

She would be disappointed by him. Disgusted. And that would be the last time he'd see her. She would turn away from him when she realizes that he is a human wreck.

But then he realizes that his cold fingers begin to tremble as she reaches for them. Her soft, warm fingers intertwine with his and his skin feels as if small jolts of electricity shoot through his skin.

When he finally looks at Aria, he isn't able to breath for a moment. Not only is she beautiful. Not only is she sitting there like an angel who wants to get involved with the devil. Her eyes are so gentle and full of worry and so free from disappointment and disgust.

 _She has so beautiful eyes_. This is the last thought that guides him as he pulls her up to him and gently presses his lips on hers. Surprised, Aria holds her breath. She closes her eyes with pleasure and immediately forgets what she has planned.

She wanted to be there for him. She has overcome her own pride and decided that it is more important that he knows that she wants to be there for him.

But she didn't plan to kiss him now. She just wanted to talk and keep her distance. But now she pushes all these thoughts back.

Now she climbs astride on his lap as he pulls her closer with his hands on her back. Not a single second any one of them interrupts the kiss.

It feels like a stirring storm that goes through her body as Jason gently pushes his tongue against her lips and she opens her lips without hesitation. The kiss becomes ever more intense and her breathing becomes more and more heavy. They both gasp for air, as their lips parted for a moment.

Jason falls back on his bed and pulls Aria with him. Gently, he strokes her hair out of her face, before this time Aria bends down to him and kisses him.

When she finally drops to the side, he feels as she had give him the air which makes him able to breath. He could just kiss her for hours.

Both of them lie side by side on the bed and stare at the ceiling. "I haven't heard from you for a long time", Aria finally says. It shouldn't sound like an accusation. She knows she can't even make this accusation. It is just a statement. But Jason doesn't answer.

"How are you?" She asks cautiously. Jason thinks a moment before he answers. If he is honest, he doesn't even know how he is. He doesn't understand himself anymore. He doesn't know why her presence has such an influence on him. Never had any woman really influenced how he feels.

"I'm fine", he says simply. Aria can't help but laugh. She doesn't think his answer is funny at all. But that he is so obviously lying to her, makes her laugh tiredly. "I'm ok", Jason corrects his response after her reaction.

Aria turns to him and simply takes his hand and connects her fingers with his. As innocent as this gesture is, so intimate is it for Jason and so much familiarity it says for him. With every other person, he would have pulled away his hand the second she took it, but the warmth of her fingers flow through his whole body and make him smile timidly.

"You're a bad liar, do you know that?" Aria notes, gently stroking the back of his hand. "I can listen well, you know? If you'd like?" She says, not speaking the rest of the sentence.

But Jason shakes his head. Aria turns away disappointed. She has hoped that he would accept her offer, that he has so much trust in her that he would tell her why he feels so miserable.

But Jason doesn't want to talk to her about it. He just can't talk to her about it. Because she is the center of everything for him. The center of his good and bad days. And he just can't talk to her about it.

"Sometimes it makes things more bearable if you have someone with whom you can share them and get rid of everything that concerns you", Aria says, staring at the ceiling because she is afraid to look at him.

"Why are you here, Aria?" His voice sounds so cold that Aria immediately doubts whether it was a good idea to go to him.

"Ali has told us that you have often been celebrating in the past few days and have drunken a lot. I was worried about you", Aria answers honestly. She knows he doesn't want to, but she still hopes that he accepts the offer and talks to her.

"And I missed you", she adds, sighing. Her heart is beating wildly in her breast. The few moments until he answers seem like distressing hours.

"I don't want you to worry about me and I don't want you to miss me", Jason says angrily. His gaze is so cold that she can hardly remember that Jason, who kissed her so longingly a few minutes ago. The kisses that spoke a different language than the words he says now.

"What?" She asks, horrified. But actually, she knows what he is going to say. Actually, she does. She has crossed his borders. He doesn't want her to worry about him. He just wants to have fun. Completely non-committal shit no matter if one of them suffers and the other one has to watch.

"It's so simple. We meet, make out and then we go apart again. That's all, Aria. You aren't supposed to have any interest in what I do or what I don't do. When I want to drink, I drink. And if I do that every day. It doesn't have to interest you."

Now he looks at Aria again and wants to take back all his words for a brief moment when he sees the tears burning in her eyes. That eyes, which expresses so much pain that he likes to take her and hug her closely.

"Don't act like you don't care. You don't even have to try to pretend that you wouldn't care if I'm the one who suffers obviously as bad as you are", Aria says in tears.

"But that's the truth. I don't give a fuck about you, Aria. I like to kiss you and that's damn everything that connects us. What do you think? You're only sixteen. No idea what you've imagined in your naive little world, but that is not the reality and it will never be", Jason shouts at her.

He immediately lowers his head and buries his face in his hands. He can't stand to look at her now. He knows he acts horribly. She doesn't deserve it and she just wants to help him. But it just doesn't work. He just can't pull her into his fucked-up life.

"I know you just want to push me away and I can bear a lot. I'd be there for you, Jason. I would listen to you and I wouldn't ignore the pain in your eyes. But there are limits. And you just passed them. And I think I have to go now, because I couldn't look into the mirror any more if I stay here now and let you treat me like that."

Jason doesn't look at her again as she walks slowly out of the room. If he does, he would probably take back every word and pull her to him and tell her that she is right. That he wants her to stay with him right now and lie down next to him and he doesn't have to say a word and can hold her in his arms. But he doesn't look at her again and he doesn't walk after her either.

And then the door closes and he is alone. She's gone. She was the only person who has been there for him. And the silence eats him. So much. Too much. And the fault. To be guilty of her tears. Of her pain. Only because of him, she's crying now.

He reaches for his jacket and closes the door behind him. Without a word to anyone, he runs down the steps of the house and lets the front door close with a crash. He's grown up. He can take the responsibility himself for what he is doing. And his mother or Alison don't need to act like they care.

He saw his mother standing in the kitchen in the corner of his eye. He knows that she has noticed that he left the house and he knows she heard the door fall into the lock. But no one ran after him. No one opened the door behind him and followed him desperately to stop him. None.

And so he just goes on and he knows this evening will end just like all the evenings before. And he knows that he himself took care of it. Because he has driven the only salvation out of his life.

 **So Aria is gone. What do you think? What should happen next? I like to read what you are thinking :)**


	7. Chapter 7

Aria just fell asleep when she was awakened by the recurring sound of her vibrating mobile phone.

3:24 am.

Never, never ever in life is a phone call in the middle of the night a good thing. Her pulse is racing immediately and she has difficulty breathing.

Jason.

She immediately knew who was calling her when the sound woke her up. As much as she hoped he isn't the one and that it is just some senseless, annoying call from one of her friends in the middle of the night, so much so, she knew from the first moment that he is calling her.

Motionless, she stares at the display of her mobile phone. Actually, she would like to pick up the phone and hear what he has to say. But she has been crying for hours. She is afraid that she will give in easily, when she hears his voice and that she won't care what he has said to her earlier. She doesn't want to lose herself in him again.

With trembling fingers Aria holds the buzzing mobile phone in her hand until it stops and the light of the display goes out. For a few minutes, she still stares at the phone. What did he want to tell her? Had he needed her? Now at the moment? What if he is lying somewhere again? Drunk. Beaten. Desperate. And she simply didn't answer his call.

But he hurt her. No word of any language can describe what he has destroyed in her when he screamed at her and claimed that he doesn't care about her. And she just can't allow herself to forgive him. It was too hard. His words were too cold, too cruel and they were lied obviously.

Then a message appears on the display. He left a message on her mailbox. He left her a message. She doesn't hesitate to listen to his words for a second. Now she has the chance to hear what he wants to say without having to answer directly. She can just lie down and sleep again and never think of him again. _Or she could stop lying to herself._

Her heart pounds against her breast heavier and faster as ever as she hears him sighing before he begins to speak.

 _Aria ... you're probably asleep ... or you just don_ _'_ _t want to talk to me. I know I deserve that._

Silence. Endless seconds of silence. She can hear his breath. Every word is so hard for him. And that's not just because he's drunk.

 _All I've said ... about you ... you know it was bullshit. You're ... quite different from the others ... and you're not a stupid 16-year-old girl. You're much more mature than me ... oh shit, sometimes I forget that you're so young._

Aria can hear him sighing again. Tears are burning in her eyes. Hearing his voice, hearing him say these things, make her cry again.

 _But you shouldn_ _'_ _t worry about me. You should stick to our agreement and ignore everything else. Believe me, I'm only thinking about you, when I say this._

Silence. Aria can still hear him breathing. He hasn't hung up yet. The message hasn't ended yet. He wants to tell her something else.

 _But anyway ... I'm sorry for what I said ... and I ... I missed you, too._

That's it. With these words the message ends. Aria takes the phone from her ear and stares at it, as if she isn't sure if he has really left that message on her mailbox. His words still echo in her ears ... _I'm sorry ... I missed you, too ... I'm only thinking about you_... The thoughts revolve in her head. She will definitely not sleep a second anymore.

* * *

Aria's thoughts are full of him as she sips at her cup of coffee and looks excitedly at the clock to count the few hours it takes for the concert to begin. She wanted to go with him to this concert. Immediately, when she had unpacked the tickets on her birthday, she was sure she wanted to go with him. But that seems to be a long time ago.

Aria has decided not to ask him. She didn't just ask him because he probably would have said no anyway because he would be afraid that they could be seen together. After the phone call on her birthday and all the ups and downs of the last few weeks, she simply had no more interest to ask him.

She hasn't spoken to him since he left the message on her mailbox two days ago. Afterwards she has struggled with herself all night long. First, she wanted to call him immediately. Then she planned to keep him dangling at least until the next morning. But ultimately, she decided that nothing really changed.

Aria has already known that he didn't mean the words as he said them, without him saying it to her. Even though she is happy about the fact that he has grabbed the mobile phone to tell her exactly this and apologize to her.

But he also said that she should stick to her agreement. He hasn't deviated from that. _I_ _'_ _m only thinking about you._ What does he mean? And how can he say he is thinking about her when it hurts so damn much that he always pushes her away?

Today Aria just wants to have fun and enjoy the concert. She doesn't want to go to the concert with stomach ache because she can't know whether he will enjoy spending time with her or whether he will pretend that he doesn't really know her and that they aren't familiar with each other at all and that she is only the annoying friend of his little sister, who is constantly looking for his closeness.

Instead, she enters the small hall, where the concert takes place, with Alison in the evening. Alison had seen the tickets on Aria's desk and she asked enthusiastically whether Aria already knew who would get the second ticket.

Even if Alison isn't easy as a friend, lately, Aria has the feeling that Alison accepts that Aria is different and that she wants to be like that. Aria still says what she thinks. But Alison seems to be able to live with that.

Aria has hardly taken a step into the small hall, when Alison takes her arm and pulls her with her to get a place in the front row. For Aria it isn't important to be in the front row, but she is doing her friend the favor.

The hall, where the concert takes place, is relatively tiny. There is no room for more than 200 people. But Aria likes exactly those small concerts by artists, which not everyone knows.

"Wow, did you see that guy?" Alison asks, grabbing Aria's hand to get the attention of her friend. Aria looks at her questioningly. "Whom?" She replies, looking around. "The guy there at the loudspeaker. He is a hottie, isn't he?" Alison asks. Aria looks at him for a while and shrugs her shoulders indecisively.

"If you think so", she says unimpressed. Alison seems to be horrified by her reaction. "Come on, use your eyes!", Alison replies. "Then tell me who you think is hot?" Aria didn't even hear her friend's question. Her attention is given to the man who has just emerged behind the stage and is now staring at her as if he has just seen a ghost.

"What's going on?" Alison asks, irritated, as she discovers Aria's absent, stare look. She follows the look of her friend and moans annoyed. "Oh yeah, my brother is unfortunately also here. He helped to build up the stage. Annoying, I know. But that way he can drive us home."

Arias has major problems to prevent that Alison notices the panic, which is now rising in her. She wants to maintain a distance from him but now he will drive them home? And she can't even tell her friend why she would rather reject the offer to be driven home by Jason.

Aria tries to turn her gaze away from Jason so that she doesn't look so conspicuously so that Alison would draw particular conclusions from her look. This can't happen. It isn't easy since Jason is here. But she doesn't want to talk to him or give him a second more of her attention anyway.

In fact, she tries to turn her gaze to the stage or to give Alison her full attention just to avoid being tempted to search the room for him.

Aria feels the goose bumps spreading on her skin when she hears the soulful voice of the singer. Alison is so fixed on him that she doesn't even notice how Aria blinks back the tears as she soaks in every single word of the lyrics.

 _No I don't mean to be rude_

 _But I'm sick and tired of you_

 _Oh Baby I'm so confused_

 _Do you love me or am I just being used_

Aria loses herself so much in the music that she barely notices the vibrating of her mobile phone. With tear-stained eyes she sees that he has written her a message. For a brief moment, she considers to simply put the phone back in her bag and to ignore him.

But she knows very well that she won't succeed. As much as she wants to banish him from her thoughts, she doesn't really succeed. She wants to know what he has to say. With a beating heart she opens his message.

 **I didn** **'** **t know you like Jamie Sloan.**

Aria rolls her eyes. When she looks up, she immediately looks into his eyes. As if she is magnetically attracted by him, she immediately saw him standing next to the stage. He smiles at her timidly when he sees that she has read his message.

Now she should simply put the phone away. She simply shouldn't answer him. But her fingers tap faster than she can even think about it.

 **Maybe it's because you don** **'** **t want to talk to me.**

Aria can't take her gaze from him after she has sent the message. She wants to see his reaction. After reading her words, he looks at her again. He knows she is still angry. Really angry.

Aria actually thinks she can see in his eyes that he regrets the words he said two days ago. But maybe she just hopes he does. Perhaps he just forgot every word he whispered in her phone. He probably doesn't care whether he has hurt her or not. If she no longer wants to kiss him and play by his rules, he will find another woman. She seems to be replaceable for him anyway.

 **I would love to kiss you now.**

Aria is startled to feel the vibration of her cell phone. She was so lost in her thoughts that she hasn't even noticed that he was typing on his cell phone again. Immediately she smiles as she reads his message. _I wanna kiss you, too_. That is the first thought on her mind. And it is the truth. To see him here makes her heart beat faster. But she can't be so stupid and just give in and forget everything.

 **There are a lot of other women in the room that you can kiss.**

Angry and without waiting for another answer, Aria puts the phone back in her bag. She doesn't want to play his game anymore. It just hurts too much.

After the last song ended, Aria thinks that she has to be alone before Alison realizes how upset she is and that she is about to burst into tears. Aria tells her friend that she's going to the toilet and is heading towards the narrow corridor, indicated by a sign.

She has almost reached the door to the toilets as suddenly a hand wraps around her wrist and pulls her with him. It's no surprise when he turns on the light from the room he pulled her in and it's Jason face Aria is looking at.

Aria looks around in the room and almost starts laughing. "Do you think that this is funny?" She asks. Jason took her to a store room. Just like her first encounter.

But Jason doesn't understand her question and just looks at her irritated. "Forget it", Aria replies without any explanation. But Jason doesn't really demand to explain her question. Instead, he gently puts his hand on her cheek and strokes her reddened skin with his fingertips.

With all his strength, Aria resists the desire to simply put her cheek in his touch and pulls her face away from him.

"What's wrong? Didn't you hear my message? ", Jason asks, impatiently.

 _I'm in love with you. Don_ _'_ _t you get that, asshole!_

She shouts this confession to him in her thoughts as she looks deeply into his eyes. But she just can't actually say these words. Too high is the probability that Jason won't suddenly say that he feels the same for her and that he would press a kiss on her lips.

No, instead, he would look at her furiously and tell her that he doesn't want the same thing as her and that they can't see each other anymore.

Carefully Jason puts a strand of hair out of her face and puts it behind her ear. "You aren't still angry, are you?" He asks softly. He knows this is a stupid question. He knows very well that she is still angry at him. And with every word he makes it worse.

"I told you I'm sorry. I didn't mean what I said. Let's just forget about it and keep going from the point where we left off. We had fun together", he whispers to her, his lips getting closer and closer.

Without thinking what this will do to her, Aria looks at him and loses herself in his green eyes and his charming smile.

Again, she can feel Jason's breath on her skin and this time he starts kissing her because Aria let him do it. But when Jason wanders from her lips to her neck and breathes light kisses against it, he suddenly hears her sobbing softly.

Immediately he stops and looks into her tear-stained eyes. "I can't do it anymore", she says in tears. She walks so quickly out of the storeroom that Jason is only looking at her dumbfounded and has no chance to react.

After the concert, Jason drives the girls home in his car. Jason stops at his parents' house and looks at Alison through the rear mirror and expects her to get out of his car.

"What's that for? Why don't you bring Aria home first?" She asks confused. "Come on Ali, don't annoy me. Get out", Jason says. "What's that for?" Alison asks again. Annoyed, Jason turns to his sister in the back of the car.

"Get out!", he yells at her, causing Aria to be scared on the passenger seat. Aria knows two sides of Jason. The one loving, attentive she has experienced in the special moments between them and the other one rejecting, cold side that she would rather not want to experience anymore. But she has never seen him so aggressively. Not even two days ago when he shouted at her. He wasn't angry. Aria remembers rather the despair in his voice.

Alison loosens the belt and gets wordlessly and intimidated out of the car. When his sister is out of sight, Jason starts the engine and drives off. "I'm sorry. I didn't want to scare you", he apologizes for the rage at Aria. He felt sorry as soon as he saw how Aria was frightened beside him. He doesn't want her to be afraid of him. But Aria doesn't answer and stares out of the side window.

They don't say a single word the whole time they're driving. Aria doesn't want to talk to him and Jason doesn't know what to say. When they arrive at her parents' house, Aria just wants to get out of the car as Jason reaches for her wrist carefully but firmly. He can't just let her go.

"Aria please wait, can we talk?" He asks her. Aria sighs, but remains seated. "What is your problem?" He asks, regretting his brusqueness immediately. He wanted to start this conversation differently.

Aria rolls her eyes and remains silent. "I just don't understand. We agreed. Just to have fun, no more. No one cares about the other, no one wants more from the other. It was your suggestion!" _Shut up. You idiot. Shut up. You don_ _'_ _t have to pretend you don_ _'_ _t already know._

Now Aria looks at him angrily. He messed it up. When he sees her face, he knows that he has just said the wrong words." Then I have probably determined that I can't do it", she answers him loudly.

"What do you mean?" _Stop asking stupid questions. You know what that means._

"That means I can't do it anymore. I can't just kiss you and ignore your eyes are always glazed. That I feel you're not yourself anymore. I can't ignore that you are constantly smelling of alcohol and reeling around the area. And I can also admit that it hurts me if you see nothing else in me but the girl, with whom you can make out whenever it suits you. I can admit that I care for you, Jason. I can admit that I like you. It's just not that I like to kiss you. I like you. And I can admit that you are important to me and that I like to spend time with you. But you can't do all this because you are afraid of being hurt. You're afraid to make yourself emotionally dependent on someone. You can't admit that someone is important to you. And that's why it doesn't work out", Aria shouts at him.

The anger flares up in her eyes. Jason has never seen her so angry. And then the tears break out of her and she starts to sob violently. Jason just sits there and feels like he can't move. Her tears make him freeze.

"It just hurts too much. I can see how much you're suffering. But you just don't want me to be there for you and to help you." Jason doesn't say a word. He is too overwhelmed by the situation. "Goodbye, Jason", Aria whispers looking down. She gets out of his car and walks to her parents' house without looking back.

 **So what do you think? Did he lose her?**

 **I highly recommend to check out the music of Jamie Sloan. It is really worth it. :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Tiny trigger warning about sexual abuse and rape**

For two weeks Aria hasn't entered the house of the DiLaurentis family anymore. She liked to invite her friends to her place and she had no problem at all going to all her other friends' houses and spending hours there. Only if they wanted to meet at Alison's, she had come up with some excuse.

But slowly, she fears that Alison might wonder why Aria doesn't want to come to her place anymore. That is why she has forced herself to go to her today. But still, she wants to avoid to meet Jason. She isn't ready to see him again yet.

Although Aria considers herself to be very determined, Jason seems to be her weak spot. Therefore, Aria is afraid that, no matter how angry and hurt she might be, he would still manage to wrap her around his little finger again, if she would only see him once again.

When Aria walks around the house on the narrow path, as they have arranged with Alison, she can already hear Jason's angry voice from far away. Spencer, Emily and Hanna are already sitting in the garden, all looking towards the house.

Only now Aria can see that Jason and Alison are arguing in the house violently. Instantly her heart begins to beat faster. Did Alison notice something? Had she uncovered their secret? Is that the reason why the siblings scream so loudly at each other now?

"What's going on?", Aria asks her friends with a beating heart. In fact, she is wondering if she should leave or whether she will be the next one who will be shouted at by Alison, when she stays.

"I don't know, we just sit here and watch them for a few minutes. You aren't able to understand a lot despite the volume", Spencer replies. She is right. Aria tries to read the lips of the two, but she can't understand a context.

Then the girls see how Jason leaves the room furiously and Alison stands still for a moment. You can obviously see that Alison isn't unaffected by that argument they had. But then she sees the girls watching her out of the garden and she seems to shake off all her emotions and walks to the back door.

"Hi", Alison shouts euphorically as she walks across the grass to her friends. "Hi", all the girls reply silently. "What's going on?" Spencer asks. Aria's heart is still pounding wildly. "Nothing, just his usual confused talk when he's high", Alison replies, looking down, not giving the girls the chance to read any emotions in her face.

But Aria doesn't need that. And the other girls don't need to see her face either. Everyone knows that it was about more and that she is actually thinking about his words. Whatever he said to her.

Aria could see that Jason's gaze was clear. He wasn't high when he was fighting with his sister. For some reason, he really worries about Alison. Aria is sure about that. She just doesn't know the reason.

"Tomorrow Chad celebrates a party. We'll all go. Therefore, think about what you want to wear", Alison tells her friends, without giving them the choice to decide whether they want to go.

"Chad?" Hanna asks. "Who is that?" Spencer asks. "I don't know him. But he goes to college and throws a party and we'll go to this party", Alison says with a bright smile.

"Does your brother know him?" Emily asks and the other girls guess why she asks her this question. Emily suspects that the dispute between the siblings might have something to do with this party. "Yes, he knows him", Alison replies, ignoring what her brother thinks of Chad.

This ends the topic for Alison. Aria hardly hears a word about what Alison says about the latest city gossip. It wouldn't interest her any other day either. But today, she is still thinking about why Jason was so angry with his sister.

The afternoon feels like an eternity. Aria always remembers Jason's angry face and the rage in his voice when he shouted at his sister. She doesn't know what's going on, and yet she is sure Jason is only worried about Alison.

That he wants to keep her from something that would hurt her. And she simply doesn't get rid of the thought that this party has something to do with the dispute. Maybe she shouldn't go to this party? Probably all the girls shouldn't go to this party.

Aria can hardly concentrate on a word of her friends all afternoon. They are constantly trying to snap Aria out of her thoughts because they realize that she doesn't listen and that she has completely different things in her mind.

But they don't realize that it is Jason who dominates her thoughts. Except maybe Emily.

That is why it is almost a relief for Aria as she finally can say good-bye and leave the property of the DiLaurentis family.

* * *

Even on her way home, Aria is still thinking about the argument between Alison and Jason. Therefore, she is startled when she suddenly hears him calling her name behind her.

But she just continues walking. Aria doesn't even turn to look at him. "Aria", she hears him calling her again. She just continues walking. "Aria, please wait", he tries to stop her again. But she just continues walking.

Jason starts jogging until he suddenly stands in front of her and blocks her way. Gentle but resolute, he reaches for her arm. "Aria, please listen to me."

Instead of looking into his face, Aria stares at his hand that lies on her arm. A heat penetrates her skin at this point. "Are you planning to go to this party?" He asks her. Aria can't believe it. After all the words she said to him, after all the days that they didn't talk to each other, this is the first question he poses.

"No idea. Maybe. Probably", she replies annoyed, consciously looking past him. "Ok, you won't go to this party. You all won't go to this party", Jason says. Now Aria doesn't really know what to say.

"What?" She asks, horrified, that he tries to forbid her to go. "You're not going to that party", Jason says. "And who do you think you are, that you can forbid me to go?" She asks angrily. Jason sighs. He almost expected her to react like this.

"I don't forbid you to go, I just ask you not to go." For the first time, Aria looks straight into his eyes and recognizes the determination but also the worry in his eyes. "Why?" She asks. "This isn't a harmless college party you're sneaking into", Jason says, wondering how to convince the girl in front of him.

"Chad and his friends aren't nice guys with whom you can flirt a bit and then you just go home again." When he sees Aria's look, he knows he chose the wrong words. "You really think I'm that naive, don't you?" She yells at him angrily.

"Aria please", with imploring eyes, Jason looks at her and puts his hand on her forearm again. But this time, Aria goes a step back, so that his hand falls from her. "These guys are dangerous. Please don't go to that party", Jason tries to convince her again.

"And why does it interest you, whether I go to this party or not?" She hisses at him. She knows she is pushing him with this question. No feelings, no one cares about the other. These were his words and now he stands in front of her and is so worried about her that he wants to keep her from going to this party.

But Jason just stands in front of her and struggles for words. For a moment, Aria believes Jason will actually answer her honestly. But then, he seems to decide otherwise.

"God damn, can't you just listen to me?" He replies without answering her question. "No", she whispers and walks past him. But then she turns around again.

"You just have to be honest, Jason. Not even to me, but to yourself", Aria says before she finally leaves.

* * *

The next evening, Alison has nothing to complain about when she receives Aria at the door. Instead, she nods approvingly. Aria, without much thought, had put on the most wide-cut top in her wardrobe. Her push-up bra also gets the best out of her actually tiny bust size.

She ignores the bad feeling that is spreading in her as she sees Jason standing at the top of the stairs. It's his gaze that causes the guilty conscience.

Because his gaze doesn't say he wants to kiss her when he sees her in this outfit. That isn't really what her sight triggers in him. Instead Aria can see in his face how worried he is about her and the other girls.

But she knows that he won't come down the stairs now and he won't tell her exactly that. He would have to ask her only once again not to go to this party because he is worried about her and he doesn't want anything to happen to her because she means a lot to him and because he enjoys spending time with her and she would change her plans and stay in his arms tonight.

But he doesn't. Instead, he turns around and walks back to his room, where he lets the door crash into the lock noisily.

"Bad mood, as always", Alison murmurs, rolling her eyes. She takes the hand of her friend and pulls her to the other girls in the living room.

* * *

When Aria enters the cabin with her friends, she finds exactly what she has expected and what she has already experienced at the last party: a room that has already fallen victim to the celebrating crowd, women in short outfits and a lot drunk people.

But today she doesn't want to hide in the storeroom again. Today she wants to have fun. She wants to celebrate and dance and flirt. And all this without losing control. She wants to prove to Jason that his concerns were exaggerated and groundless and that she can take good care of herself.

Aria has decided not to drink alcohol. She remains sober and can remember everything afterwards. Tonight, she will go back to Alison's place on the air mattress and nothing had happened.

The girls are shoved by the crowd around them. They are quickly pushed into the middle of the room and surrounded by a sweating, drunken crowd of students. Time and again they are jostled and pushed and Aria has trouble staying in a good mood.

When she turns around the next moment, all her friends have disappeared into the crowd. Except for Alison, who is standing next to her and stretches her head searching for people she knows. Aria isn't even sure if Alison knows only one person here.

But then she hears an uncomfortable, shrill voice calling for her friend. "Ali, Ali sweety. Wait for me!" A blonde woman, with softly falling curls, steers a course towards the two. Her faked smile stands out among the bright white teeth. She could really be Alison's big sister.

"Ali, how nice to see you", the young woman chirps when she arrives at the two girls. A bit too euphoric, she embraces Alison. Then she stops and looks at Aria. "And who are you?" She asks, looking as if she had just looked at a little puppy or a baby.

"Aria", Aria answers monosyllable. She already doesn't like her. "Nice to meet you, Aria", she replies. Again, something too euphoric. "I'm Cece", she responds with a bright smile that Aria already can't stand to look at anymore.

Cece. What kind of a stupid name is that? For what is this supposed to be the abbreviation? Aria doesn't really want to judge so quickly about people she doesn't know. But she doesn't like Cece since the moment they met and she doesn't really know why.

"Wonderful that you're here", Cece squeals and Aria resists the urge to roll with her eyes. "I've already seen your brother", she says, turning back to Alison.

Jason? He is here? Immediately, Aria is attentive. As she looks at her friend, Aria notes that Alison is also surprised by this information. "Really?" She replies questioningly. Cece nods joyfully. "Yes, and honestly, he has looked better", Cece says, laughing.

Even if Aria tries to be unaffected by this comment, she is annoyed. Of course, Jason has been better. But this is no reason to make fun of him. And how does Cece know him at all?

 _Don_ _'_ _t think of him. You can_ _'_ _t care about why she knows him. This is no longer important._ Time and again she thinks of him. Time and again, she has to remember that she has actually banished him from her life. But he just doesn't leave her thoughts.

Her thoughts are already turning around him so much that she doesn't follow the conversation until Cece is already saying goodbye and disappears in the crowd.

"Cece recently had a thing with Jason. Until she came to her senses and separated from him", Alison explains without Aria asking for it. The stitch in her chest is still undeniable. She is jealous. But she tries to hide her feelings in front of Alison and nods only as if this has been an information that isn't relevant to her.

Not even a minute has passed when a tall, dark-haired, adroitly very attractive young man heads towards the two. "Girls, I'm the host Chad Walker and like to know all my guests", he says in a stern tone.

Aria's and Alison's breath stops briefly because they fear that Chad suspects they aren't college students. "What's your name?" He asks, laughing charmingly. The seriousness immediately left his face, which makes Aria and Alison relieved.

"I'm Ali and this is my friend Aria", Alison replies, giving him a charming smile in return. But Chad has already turned to Aria. "Nice", he murmurs as he looks at Aria and Alison chuckles because she thinks Chad doesn't only like her friend's name.

Aria feels uncomfortably because of the way he is looking at her and a strangely bad feeling settles in her stomach. _Chad is dangerous._ His voice echoes in her mind, but she tries to push him out of her thoughts again. She can take care of herself.

"Nice to meet you", Aria finally replies, trying to smile. "It's a pleasure to me you, too", Chad murmurs, putting his arm around Arias shoulder. For a moment, she flinches. She didn't expect him to search for body contact so quickly and that he would come so close to her so quickly.

But she allows him to touch her. Even if she feels uncomfortably. Today she wants to celebrate and take everything a little more relaxed. Therefore, she lets herself be dragged by him without hesitation and throws her friend only a small glance over the shoulder and sees how Alison waves at her smiling.

* * *

...And then suddenly everything is spinning around her. The mass of people blends into each other. She can't distinguish one individual from the other. Instead, she feels that her legs are slipping away and she can't walk a step.

Her eyes are getting heavier. She can hardly keep them open and becomes panic-stricken. What's going on with her? She hasn't drunken any alcohol. She has insisted on Chad to get her only a coke.

She has never been drunk. She had never drunk so much alcohol that she'd been drunk. But she still feels that something is wrong with her. She didn't drink anything. Why does she feel so dizzy?

Aria feels how someone is reaching for her arm and then hears Alison's voice, who is worried about her as she drops onto the floor and her eyes are closing.

 **So what do you think has happenend with Aria? And what do you think will happen next? Please tell me your thoughts :)**


	9. Chapter 9

"Aria! Aria!", Alison cries worried. "What's wrong?" But her friend is no longer answering her. Aria has already fallen to the ground and shows no reaction. A feeling of panic overwhelms Alison. What's going on? Is Aria drunk? She had insisted firmly that she didn't want to drink any alcohol.

Alison searches for the other girls in the crowd desperately. Tears blur her eyes. At last she can recognize Hanna's blonde, curly hair. "Hanna", she shouts to get the attention of her friend.

Simultaneous, Alison draws all the attention of the other party guests to herself when she shouts for her friend in panic. Everyone turns around to her and looks curiously at the girl who is kneeling next to her friend, who is lying on the floor with her eyes closed.

When Hanna recognizes what has happened her eyes widen and she fights her way through the crowd to her desperate friend. "What's wrong with her?" Hanna asks frightened. Alison notes how her mouth moves, but no sound comes out of it. Instead, she just stares at Hanna.

Alison doesn't hesitate any second longer after she has made a plan and decides to leave her friend alone with Aria. She can still hear Hanna's loud shouts behind her, when she is running along the corridor. Hanna probably doesn't understand what she's up to and why Alison is simply running away. But Alison has no time to explain to Hanna what she is going to do.

Because Alison doesn't run away. She runs to him. She can't do it alone. She can't do it without him. She doesn't know what to do. She feels as she once did, like the little girl who is searching for the help of her brother when someone upset her. But she needs him now.

Without paying attention to the other people, she is running and is only looking for him. It doesn't matter to her when someone shouts at her angrily, because she jostled theperson. She has to find him now.

Finally, she sees him. Jason stands lonely and leant against the wall in the hallway, watching the people who walk past him as he hears the desperate shouts of his sister. "Jason! Jason!", Alison cries. He immediately turns to look at her and feels how his heart is starting to beat faster.

Tears overflow his sister's face as she is running towards him. Immediately, Alison reaches for his forearm and wants to pull him with her. "You have to help me." Jason has no choice but to go with her because she pulls so heavily at him.

"Ali, what's going on? Why are you crying?", Jason asks worried about his sister. "You have to come with me. I need your help. Aria is..." As soon as he hears Aria's name, he interrupts her. "What's wrong with Aria?" He asks tremulously.

"I don't know, everything was fine and then... you just have to come with me", Alison replies in tears.

Like his sister, Jason doesn't even notice the people around him as his sister pulls at him. His heart beats so incredibly fast. Something's wrong with Aria. He rarely saw his sister with such a fearful look.

He begged Alison not to go to this party. Chad is definitely not one of those people his sister and her friends should spend time with. Finally, he shouted at her angrily because she didn't want to trust in his judgment and had to do exactly the opposite of what he had told her.

Jason didn't want to go to this party. Just as he doesn't want to go to any of these parties and still does. Ultimately, he is only at this place because he knew Alison wouldn't listen to him and the girls would be there.

When Jason and Alison arrive at the bunch of people who are standing around Aria and Hanna, the others immediately take a step back to clear the way for them. Jason doesn't even notice their shocked faces that are looking at the unconscious girl at the floor. He notices them as little as he notices Hanna, who helplessly kneels beside her friend on the ground.

Jason kneels on the other side of Aria and bends over her head. He turns his ear to her mouth and to his relief he can feel her breath on his skin.

Jason looks at Hanna. "Has anyone called the ambulance?" Hanna just nods, without saying a word. "Did she drink alcohol?" He asks turning to Alison. His sister shakes her head, still shocked by what has just happened.

"No, she didn't want to drink", Alison says so silently that almost only Jason can hear it. "I told her, she should get something to drink, but she didn't want to", Alison says tremulously.

Jason looks down at Aria again. Something is not right. She was feeling well and then she lays unconsciously on the floor, even though she hasn't drunk anything? Suddenly Jason is overcome with an idea. An idea that simultaneously frightens him and makes him angry.

"Have you been with her all evening?" He asks his sister. Alison shakes her head. "No, just at the beginning." Jason notes how the rage in him is getting bigger because he suspects his suspicion is correct. "Why? What did she do afterwards?" He asks.

"Chad came to us and flirted with her. I left them alone", Alison says, feeling immediately that she shouldn't have done that. She should have stayed with her.

But she has no time to think about it or to regret anything. The next moment, her thoughts are interrupted by seeing Jason in the corner of her eye. As she turns her gaze to him, she sees how her brother pushes Chad at the collar of his shirt against the wall with a loud bang.

"What did you do to her?" Jason yells at him, though his face is only a few inches away from Chad's. "Have you poured anything in her drink?" He asks angrily. His hands are still holding the fabric of his clothes. He won't let him get away with it.

Alison's eyes widen as she understands what her brother blames Chad for. She left her friend alone, and Chad took advantage of Aria to make her weak-willed and submissive. Alison watches how Jason is still screaming at Chad.

But Chad doesn't answer. Instead, he just looks arrogantly down at Jason. "She's sixteen, asshole!" Jason shouts again. Chad's face still remains unmoved. He probably didn't know, but he probably didn't care anyway.

"You won't get away with it", Jason warns. Even if Chad doesn't say a single word and admits nothing, Jason is sure his suspicion is correct. Chad has poured something in Aria's drink. He doesn't want to imagine what Chad has planned to do with her afterwards.

"Oh yeah?" Chad says with a mocking grin. "Perhaps you shouldn't play the good guy that much. Otherwise, I may give the police the hint to make a drug test with you." Jason still pushes Chad with a firm grip against the wall.

Jason has to control himself to not just beat him up. But that wouldn't help either Aria or him at the moment. "You can't be serious. You can't compare what you wanted to do to her with what I'm doing", Jason hisses at him angrily.

"I drink a lot and take drugs. I don't deny it. But at least, I am just ruining my own life. I don't hurt anyone and don't harm anyone but myself", he shouts at Chad. He doesn't care how many people are standing around him and can hear everything he says. It's no secret that he is taking drugs, anyway.

"I don't know why I'm justifying myself in front of you", Jason murmurs as he can see the blue of the police lights in the corner of his eye and hears the siren of the emergency doctor in the next second.

Shortly thereafter, a number of paramedics storm the party, who only have to ask the crowd for a moment, before they arrive at Aria, where Hanna is still kneeling. Jason hears how Hanna tells in tears, what happened and what Jason suspects, what might have caused her condition.

The policeman, who has just tried to capture the situation and listened attentively to the blonde, tearful girl on the floor, looks around among the other party guests and sees Jason, who still has a firm grip on Chad.

The policeman approaches to the two men and immediately understands the connection between the girl lying on the ground and the two men. "I suppose you are the young man whom the other party guests reproach for making the girl submissive with the help of knockout drops?"

Chad doesn't answer, but just rolls his eyes. "Yeah, that's him", Jason replies instead, finally letting his hands fall of him. "Turn around, we'll take you to the police station", says the policeman as he pulls his handcuffs out of his belt.

Chad turns around without resistance and lets the policeman handcuff him. "I won't say anything without a lawyer", he replies. "Of course", the policeman answers mockingly. It is obvious what the man, who is presumably himself a father of a family, thinks of the young man who is still trying to get out of the crime that he committed.

With a strong grip, he leads Chad out of the house. They go past the other party guests, who still stare at him incredulously.

Immediately as Jason looks back at Aria, the rage in his eyes gives way to a look full of concern for the girl, who is still lying on the ground and is examined by an emergency physician. He is waiting next to Alison, who wiggles her arms around his waist and buries her face at his shoulder.

Finally, Aria is lifted on a stretcher and driven out of the house. When the emergency doctor sees the crying Alison and her brother, who is still looking anxiously at the unconscious girl, he approaches them.

"How is she doing? What's wrong with her?" Jason asks immediately as the man stands in front of him. "After our initial examinations, and if she hasn't drunk anything, I would unfortunately suspect that you are right with her suspicion, young man", says the doctor sighing.

Jason notes how he clenches his fists. "Therefore, my colleagues from the police will ask you to make a statement. You don't have to do that immediately. You can also go to the police station tomorrow and leave only your personal data if you want to accompany your friend to the hospital", the doctor explains.

Alison looks questioningly to her brother unsure of what to do. "You'll go to the hospital. I'll make my statement now", Jason says. As much as he wants to know that Aria is doing well, it is also important to him that Chad is going to be called to account for what he has done and that as soon as possible.

Alison nods. "Can one of you inform the girl's parents?" The doctor asks the two. Alison nods again. "Yes, I'll call them", she confirms. "Good. Thank You. Then come with me", the doctor asks her and Alison follows him to the hospital car.

* * *

It drives Jason crazy to wait at home until Alison comes back and tells him how Aria is feeling. He would have preferred to go to the hospital after he had made his statement and noticed that Alison hasn't been home yet. But he knows that the doctors are taking care of Aria and her friends and her parents are with her.

For him, it was important at that moment that this asshole can't escape and the police will take him with them. He would have liked to take his anger out on him. But he knows that doesn't help anyone. Him least of all.

Immediately, his head turns to the door as it opens gently and Alison comes in with her father, who picked her up at the hospital. Every second that he has to wait for Alison till she begins to talk is unbearable for him.

"I'll go to bed. And you two will do the same soon, right?" Their father says with a stern look to his two children. Both nod silently as they watch their father as he goes up the stairs.

"Aria is ok. The doctors couldn't completely avert the effects of the drops, but under medical supervision she is relatively safe", Alison says.

"Tomorrow, she can probably be discharged from hospital. The doctors have done tests to prove that these drops caused her condition. This had to be done as quickly as possible because the drops can only be detected for a few hours. The results are handed over to the police. They were positive", Alison continues, noticing how tears blur her eyes.

Jason just stares at his sister. The rage in him is still huge. However, knowing that Aria is safe in the hospital, the worries slowly fall of him.

Since he is lost in thought, he doesn't even notice that Alison is walking up to him. He startles as she puts her arms around him and presses her face against his chest. Tears are streaming out of her eyes. "I'm so sorry", she whispers softly sobbing.

Jason puts his arms around her and pushes his sister tightly against himself. Affectionally he breathes a kiss on her crest. "Thanks for your help tonight", Alison murmurs against his chest. Jason strokes protectively over her gold-blond hair. "For you always, Alicat", he replies. _And for Aria._

"If I hadn't left her alone with him, that wouldn't have happened", she murmurs softly. "I should have listened to you. We shouldn't have gone to this party." Jason doesn't say anything. Of course, he could say that he told her from the beginning that it is a bad idea to go to Chad's party. But he knows that his sister is already suffering enough.

"You should go to sleep", he says instead. Alison nods. "You should too. You look tired", Alison replies. In fact, she feels like seeing her brother the first time properly today and seeing the exhaustion in his eyes. They both walk up the stairs slowly and Alison embraces her brother again.

"You are wrong with what you said to Chad. That you only harm and hurt yourself. That's not true", she murmurs softly against his chest, before she frees herself out of his embrace and disappears into her room before Jason can even say or contradict one word.

* * *

Jason knows that he is crossing his own borders. He is breaking their agreement, but when he passes her parents' house, he immediately stops his car, gets out, and walks hastily to the door. But to be honest, he has crossed the boundaries for a long time. He can't even talk himself into thinking that he doesn't care about her.

Jason rings the bell so quickly that he can't even think about what he wants to say, when she doesn't open the door herself. After all, her parents don't know about him. At least not in connection with their daughter.

And just as surprised, Ella looks at him as she opens the door and sees him standing on the other side. "Jason", she says in surprise, frowning. Aria's mother looks tired. Jason can see how the little sleep and the worries of last night have affected Ella. Dark edges under her eyes and her pale skin let her look years older.

"Hello Mrs. Montgomery", Jason greets her. "You're probably wondering why I'm here. But I just want to ask how Aria is feeling." Immediately, the expression of Ella's face changes as if she had just realized why he was standing in front of her door.

"Oh yes, you were also at the party, right? Your sister told us that you stayed until the police took your statement. We have to go to the police with Aria tomorrow, so she can make her statement as well", Ella says. "I thank you very much for your help."

"Don't mention it. You don't have to thank me", Jason replies. Ella smiles at him. She had heard a lot of rumors about the young man standing in front of her. The other women in town had informed her quickly about the son of the Dilaurentis family, who seem to slip deeper and deeper into the drug addiction.

Now he stands in front of her with a clear look and seems to be honestly and sincerely worried about her daughter.

"Do you want to come in? Aria is certainly looking forward to your visit", Ella suggests. Jason nods, though reluctantly. He had actually come to visit her and talk to her. But when they saw each other last time before the party, they argued.

He walks quietly into the house and follows Aria's mother into the living room. "Aria, you have a guest", she announces Jason to her daughter. When Aria sees Jason standing behind her mother, Aria sits up straight on the couch and smiles at him embarrassed.

"Hi", she says softly. "I'll leave you alone", says Ella, disappearing out of the room. Jason walks around the table and sits down beside her. Aria pulls the blanket, which is lying over her legs, a little higher, although her is not cold at all.

Jason smiles slightly. Aria is wearing only a pair of jogging trousers and a simple shirt and he can imagine why she is pulling the blanket up. And Aria notices that her attempt to hide her cozy clothes went wrong as well.

"I'm sorry. I look badly", Aria excuses herself, referring mainly to her clothes. Jason smiles at her amused by her embarrassment. "You look great, as always. Just a little pale", he assures her and smiles at her.

For a moment, they both remain silent. It is so quiet that you can clearly hear the ticking of the clock on the wall. "I'm sorry", Aria whispers softly. "I really didn't want to go to the party. I just went because you asked me not to go", Aria admits, lifting her head cautiously and looking at him. Jason doesn't reply.

"And I just flirted with Chad because I was angry with you", Aria whispers softly. "That was stupid of me." Jason lowers his gaze and stares at his hands.

When Aria follows his gaze, she can see how his fingers tremble slightly. She knows that thoughts are racing in his head and that she has to give him time. When she says a word too much now, she puts him under pressure and he will rebuild the wall around him.

"I'm just mad at myself", Jason suddenly says, sighing. "I made you to put yourself into danger because of my behavior", he murmurs softly and then looks deeply into her eyes.

The sight of him leaves Aria speechless. She has never seen him with such a gentle gaze. She has never felt that he meant every word absolutely honestly and didn't want to hide his feelings. He had never been so worried about her.

"I was really worried about you, Aria", Jason admits, burying his face in his hands. "The thought of what he was going to do with you, what would have happened if Ali hadn't been with you and immediately realized something was wrong, almost kills me", he says tremulously.

"He didn't. Nothing happened", Aria replies immediately. "That's not true", Jason says energetically. "You put yourself in danger because of me. Because I wasn't able to tell you that I care about you." Aria holds her breath for a moment, as Jason reaches for her hand.

"You're important to me", he confesses and Aria's heart feels as if it is jumping in her breast. In fact, Jason feels relieved to express what has long been indisputable. Jason hesitates a moment before he goes on.

"I like spending time with you. Every time we maintain a distance from each other, my life was really a whole lot more unbearable than with you", he says. "Maybe I should stop denying that I really need a friend like you. That a friendship with you would really mean a lot to me."

 _Ouch._ The fall came so unexpectedly that the pain now runs through her properly.

Aria tries not to let Jason notice that her heart has got a deep crack at his last words. He cares about her. Hearing these words from him means much more to her than she had ever dared to admit.

 _Friends. He wants to be her friend. She should be his friend. A friend._

But when she looks at him, she is almost ashamed of these thoughts. His look. This look, with which he now looks at her, she can rarely describe with words. She knows it is an effort of will for him to sit in front of her and ask her to be there for him. Although friendship is an incredible gain to any other person in life, it is a big risk for Jason.

For weeks, she had hoped and begged him to let her help him, to allow her to be there for him. And that is what he does now. She shouldn't be so selfish and only think that she actually wants more of him than just his friendship.

He needs her friendship. He wants someone to be there for him. He wants her to be there for him. And she can see all his unspoken fears in his eyes.

 _Please don_ _'_ _t let me regret that I let you into my life. Please don_ _'_ _t cause any more pain. I couldn_ _'_ _t stand being hurt by you. Especially by you._

"I'm here for you. Always. But don't think I don't need you the same way", Aria replies, looking into his eyes as if she is sealing a promise.

Jason smiles at her in relief. He has hoped that Aria could forgive him. But if he is honest, he wouldn't have been surprised if she doesn't want to have anything to do with him anymore. He has behaved horribly, and other people have turned away from him for less.

"Do you still notice anything about the effect of the drops?" Jason asks hesitantly. It is still hard for him to remind himself what happened last night. Especially because he just feels so damn guilty. "Not really, I'm just tired today", Aria replies. Jason nods.

"I should go back home anyway", Jason says. "I didn't want to kick you out. You can still stay a bit", Aria replies quickly. "No, you better get a little rest", Jason says and Aria suspects that he needs some time to recover from last night's events himself.

"Ok, I'll take you to the door." Jason nods and gets up from the couch. Wordlessly they stride to the door. Although he came to her and asked her for her friendship, her relationship is still unresolved.

Unresolved, because Aria doesn't know if friendship is really all that he feels for her. And unresolved, because she doesn't know what that really means for them. As she is standing in front of him, she doesn't know how to say good-bye to him.

Ultimately, she does what she would like to do at this moment. She takes a step out of the door and pulls the door behind her as far as she can to protect them from prying eyes. Aria takes his hand in hers and leans a little further to him and stretches her head up to his.

But Jason takes a step back. And with this reaction, she knows she doesn't want to hear what he will tell her. "Aria", he murmurs softly, and Aria feels that he doesn't even want to say the next words himself.

"Maybe we shouldn't do that." There they are. The words she was so afraid of. Because she doesn't want to stop. And she also doesn't know if she is able to stop. "Maybe we should just be friends if you understand what I mean", Jason says.

Of course, she knows what he means. You don't kiss a friend. And it's so hard for Aria because Jason is more for her than a friend. But she promised him. She wants to be there for him. And if it is necessary again under his conditions.

Finally, Aria nods and only looks after him as he turns around hesitantly and goes back to his car. It has never been so painful for Aria to win a friend.

 **So what do you think? I would really appreciate if you take the time and leave me a review. I am not a native speaker (as you probably have noticed ;)) and it is a lot work for me to translate my stories into English. So I am a little bit sad about the small amount of reviews I got for the last chapters :( I really wanna know what you are thinking even if you don't like my stories.**


	10. Chapter 10

It feels like all people stare at her as Aria walks along the streets of Rosewood. For that reason, she has her eyes directed to the ground since she doesn't want to see the way the people around her are looking at her. The girl who nearly has been sexually abused or even raped.

Probably everyone has read the story in the newspaper this morning. A report that tells about a girl who has illegally and without the knowledge of her parents sneaked into a party and has trusted a young man who has abused this trust. But the real reasons for Arias behavior at this party knows only one person.

It hurts her to know that he blames himself for everything that happened to her that night. Even if she is happy that the bad events of the night have awakened him. So much so that he was finally able to tell her that he was worried about her. _So much._

Nevertheless, she blames herself, too. Aria is ashamed that she has been so careless, just to get her own back on him. She never wanted him to blame himself.

When she opens the door of the Brew, all heads turn to her for a fraction of a second. Then they turn away from her again and everyone acts as if nothing has happened. But a conspicuous, low murmur arises around Aria. Sighing, she heads to the back of the café and flops onto the couch.

Not a minute later, she sees Emily walking towards her smiling. "Hey", Emily greets her friend, hugging her tightly. "How are you?", Emily asks and although Aria knows that Emily is just worried, Aria hates the way she looks at her now.

"I'm fine", Aria replies, looking nervously at her hands. "I still feel a little weak and it is still hard to think about what could have happened, but I'm fine", Aria explains her current condition.

Emily nods understandingly. "I'm sorry I wasn't there. We shouldn't have left one of us alone", she says sighing. "But I also made that mistake with Spencer and she drank so much that I had to take her home", Emily explains why she wasn't at the party anymore that evening.

Aria almost swallows her coffee. "Spence got drunk?" She asks incredulously. It is hard for her to imagine that her always so ambitious and controlled friend should have had one too many. Emily nods, laughing before her look becomes serious again.

"Do you remember what happened that evening?" She asks cautiously. Aria pauses for a moment as if she has to sort out her thoughts before she is able to answer.

Finally, she nods hesitantly. "Chad came to Ali and me and introduced himself. He put his arm around me and pulled me away from Ali. Then he poured me one drink another, but without alcohol, as I told him. He has complimented me all the time and I've just played along, even though I wasn't really interested in him."

Aria interrupts her story for a moment and as she continues, Emily can hear her voice trembling slightly. "I didn't look at him when he poured the last drink. I just sat there and waited for him." Emily waits until her friend continues. She doesn't want to push her.

"Then he suggested that we could get into a quieter room. I didn't want to go. Of course, I knew that he didn't want to go there just to talk to me in peace. And I didn't want more than that."

Aria sighs violently and Emily knows she will tell her now why she has gone with him. "But then I saw Jason. I saw that he saw me with Chad, and then I thought I could just pretend I'd do exactly that with Chad, what Jason thinks at that moment when he saw us disappearing into the room."

"Oh Aria", Emily replies, sighing. Her voice is free of reproach or accusation. Rather, she realizes how much the feelings for Jason influenced her friend in her decisions that evening. "I thought that I would still be able to decide for myself what I am doing a few minutes later", Aria justifies her actions.

"We just sat on the bed, when I suddenly started to feel sick. I thought I had to puke and fled faster out of the room than Chad could react to hold me there. I was looking for Ali and when I found her, I could barely hold myself onto my feet and became unconscious. I think you know the rest of the story. The police and a hospital car came and I woke up in the hospital again."

This short description of the events that Aria didn't perceive consciously, let Emily pause. "Do you know what happened the time you were unconscious?" Emily asks.

"Hanna has been with me and Ali searched for Jason because she didn't know what to do. That's all I know", Aria replies. Emily sits up straight in her chair.

"Well, so I wasn't there myself, but Hanna told me what happened and I had to talk her out quite vehemently that Jason could have feelings for you." Aria's eyes widen in surprise. "What do you mean? What happened?"

"Hanna told me that she has never seen Ali like this before. She was really worried about you and every facade that she has always maintained, has fallen off her. She really panicked and was totally overwhelmed. That's why she ran away and was looking for Jason. When he fought his way through the crowd with his sister, Hanna saw the panic in his eyes as well. Jason was hectic when he saw you lying on the floor. But he still kept a cool head and checked your breathing." For a moment, Emily pauses and watches Aria, who doesn't show any interest in interrupting her friend.

"Afterwards he tried to figure out what has happened and when he suspected that Chad could have poured something into your drink, he jumped up and held Chad with a firm grip against the wall. Jason shouted at him. He was so angry and didn't let him go until he could hand him to the police. Hanna says, when Alison leaned against him, she thought Jason was just about to break down as well because of his concern for you."

"Wow, I really didn't know", Aria murmurs. "What did you say to Hanna, why Jason did react that way?" Emily looks at her questioningly. "I mean, you've said you had to talk her out he has feelings for me."

"I told her that it was probably only his protectiveness and that he was developing the same feelings with Alison's friends, as with his sister. I don't know if she was convinced. But she didn't ask any more questions."

Aria nods, sighing. "That was so stupid of me. I just don't understand myself. I didn't want to go to this party and then Jason stands in front of me and couldn't tell me that he is asking me not to go because he cares for me and that is the only reason I go to that party."

Emily tries to suppress a faint laugh. As typical as Aria's behavior in her situation and with her emotional state may be, the consequences were serious.

"I didn't even like Chad. Sure, he is handsome. But I immediately felt uncomfortable around him. And that wasn't just because Jason warned me about him. Chad was totally pushy and I didn't want to be touched by him. But I just let him do it because I wanted to prove to Jason that I can have fun and flirt without something happening. And then I just went with him, because Jason could see us at that moment. How stupid can someone be? Why am I so stupid?" She asks bewildered at her own headless behavior.

Emily smiles sympathetically. "You know the answer, don't you? Even if you are right, your behavior has been absolutely stupid and dangerous. Did you notice that you mentioned Jason's name pretty often?" Emily points out to Aria.

"You're in love." Aria sighs. "I know. But I don't want to be at all. And not just because you behave so stupid." Emily looks at her questioningly.

"Jason visited me. Yesterday afternoon." Emily's eyes widen. She is waiting for her friend to continue. "He told me that he was totally worried about me and that he is finally admitting to himself that he cares about me and that he likes to spent time with me."

Emily's eyes get even bigger. "And then?" She asks impatiently. "Then he asked me to be friends with him and when he left and I wanted to kiss him, he said we shouldn't do that part anymore."

"Ouch", Emily comments on the events. Aria nods. "Yeah ouch." But then she shakes her head. "No, I'll tell you this exactly the way I don't want to think about it."

Emily looks at her questioningly. "I am in love with him. I can't deny that, but he came to me and finally wants me to be there for him. I want to help him, Em and if I have to I'll just wait a little longer. Step by step. At some point, he will be able to admit that he has feelings for me. At least I hope that he does."

"Of course, he does", Emily assures her, admiring her friend for holding back her own needs and feelings for Jason.

* * *

"Hello?"

Jason can clearly hear the doubts in her voice. As if she didn't trust her own eyes when she read his name on the display of her cell phone. As if she is just imaging he is calling her.

Jason regrets having treated her so badly and every second since, he's wondering why she still forgives him. Even though he's almost guilty of her being ... Jason presses his eyes together because he can't stand the thought.

"Hey", he replies softly. "How are you?" Jason asks and Aria can hear the anxious tone of his voice and knows he is really interested in her answer. "Okay. Better", Aria replies. "Why are you calling?" She asks astonished.

"I just wanted to know how you are ... and your mother mentioned yesterday that you had to make your statement today", Jason says cautiously, without wanting to push her to tell him how she felt at the police station.

"Oh yeah, right", Aria replies and Jason can hear that she is still worse than she admits. "I've told the policeman everything I remember."

"Good and you're reporting against him?" Jason asks, just to make sure. "Yes", Aria confirms. "The police told me there was a witness. A girl has seen that he has poured something into my drink", she says, sighing.

"And she didn't stop him or warn you?" Jason asked, horrified. "She said she couldn't see what this liquid has been and that she thought it was just alcohol", Aria replies. "Only when I lay down on the floor and she heard that it has been knock out drops, she has gone to the police."

Jason doesn't know what to say. He just hopes that this girl is now blaming herself as much as he does. Or he hopes for her that she doesn't. Because the feelings of guilt torment him so madly that he can hardly stand it.

"I haven't thanked you yet for what you did that night", he hears Aria saying but he immediately interrupts her. "You don't need to do that", Jason replies.

Even worse than the feelings of guilt, is the thought that Aria actually feels she ought to thank him for anything.

"Yes, I have to and I want that too. I'm glad you've been at the party and been there for me and especially for Ali", Aria replies softly.

"Of course, she's my sister and you're ... we're friends, right?" He replies, and Aria has to stop herself from thinking too much into his doubtful, uncertain voice. "But I hope I never have to do that again", Jason says, sounding almost pleading. "I'll try to be more reasonable in the future", Aria promises laughing silently.

"Why did you warn me about him? What did you know about Chad?" Aria suddenly asks.

Jason hesitates for a moment. He regrets he didn't tell her anything he knows. He should have told her what he knew. Probably he could have prevented her from going to this party or at least from flirting with Chad.

"They were just rumors. I had really hoped it would just be fictitious stories. But many people told me that Chad doesn't accept rejection and should have ignored it. However, I didn't know that he also uses knock out drops", Jason says and Aria can hear how hard each word is for him.

The silence between them overlaps the noise of the telephone line. As much as Aria wishes that it would not be like that, this night has changed something between them. There are not only the positive changes, the expressed words of him, which have remained so long unspoken but also an uncanny weight which has taken the lightness from them.

"I'm so sorry", Jason finally breaks the silence with his trembling voice. "Stop apologizing, Jason", Aria asks him and her voice sounds so gentle that he almost believes that she doesn't blame him.

"It's not your fault", she adds, as if she had guessed his thoughts. "Ok", Jason replies. He knows it is useless to contradict her further. But he also knows that she can tell him as much as she wants, that he is not to blame, he himself can't free himself from this thoughts.

"Sleep well", Aria whispers. "Good night, Aria", he murmurs ending the conversation.

* * *

As soon as Aria hears the gentle knocking against the wood of her room door, she knows that her mother is the one on the other side of the door. Over the years she has noticed how each of her family members is knocking at her door and no one is so gentle as her mother.

"Come in, Mom", Aria answers the familiar sound. Ella opens the door and Aria has to smile instantly when she sees the face of her mother.

"Hey", Ella says gently. "Hi", Aria replies with an equally gentle voice. "Are you alright?" Ella asks. The day was stirring. To report the events again was difficult for Aria. Her mother listened to the voice of her daughter, which sounded trembling and at the same time ashamed, when Aria made her statement to the policeman.

Aria nods silently. "Can I sit down with you?" Ella asks. Again, Aria nods. "Sure", she answers this time. Ella slips her shoes off her feet and sits down on Aria's bed. "I know it's hard for you, and I've given you a bit of time, but you might understand I have a few questions, don't you? As your mother."

Aria notes how her heartbeat accelerates immediately. She has already wondered that she didn't have to listen to the lecture of her parents or that still no questions have been asked. She is afraid of these questions. Because she knows that it will be hard to give explanations to her mother without actually being able to tell her anything about Jason.

"Yes, I think so", Aria replies hesitantly. "I understand you went to this party. This doesn't mean I think it is ok or your father thinks it's ok and normally we would punish you for your behavior. But we think you've already learned your lesson." Ella looks at her daughter as if she is demanding a confirmation of her statement and Aria nods.

"What I just don't understand is why you went to this room with this guy," Ella says with incomprehension. "I thought I knew you. I would never have thought you were going to a room with a guy you hardly know at a party. With a guy who is much older than you and who was too pushy for you."

Ella listened attentively to every word her daughter said at the police station and she never interrupted her once. She had only held her hand under the table and encouraged her to talk with gentle pressure.

"You told the police that you only noticed that something was wrong, when you have already been in this room with that guy. That means he didn't bring you to this room against your will." Although Ella is sure that she has the words of her daughter right in her memory, her last sentence almost sounds like a question. Again, Aria just nods.

"You knew what he was up to in this room, didn't you?" Aria nods. When Elia sees Aria's tears in her eyes, she waits a moment. But she needs an answer to her question.

"Did you really want to sleep with him at this party?", Ella asks, trying to make her voice sound free from any accusation. "No! No mom, of course not", Aria assures her mother, burying her face ashamed in her hands. "But why?" Ella asks cautiously.

Aria quickly wipes a tear from her cheek with her hand. "Please try to explain. I can't promise you I won't get angry. But I promise you I'll try to understand it", Ella encourages her to tell her what has led her to her behavior.

When Aria looks into her mother's eyes, she makes a decision. As much as she wants to keep her secret, she doesn't want her own mother to think that she would make such an important decision so easily.

"It wasn't about Chad. It could have been anyone else. And I didn't want to have sex at the party." These words suddenly burst out of Aria. She has not figured out what she wants to tell her mother now and how far she will go. The words just came out of her.

"But why?" Her mother asks again. "I wanted to make someone jealous", Aria murmurs silently. "There was someone at the party I wanted to make jealous", she repeats her statement quietly, but so clearly that her mother can understand her.

"You're in love?" Ella asks with widened eyes. For her, Aria is not ready to fall in love yet. Actually, she is still her little daughter. But perhaps she is more surprised that she hasn't noticed it before, although she always assumed that she knew her daughter better than anyone else.

Aria nods silently before she continues to stop her mother from asking questions. "You don't need to ask who he is or how long and what he thinks about it. That doesn't matter. We won't be a couple. It is hopeless. I don't want to talk about it. It just doesn't matter. But he is the reason I went to this room. He stood opposite this room and I wanted him to think ... well, you know."

Ella stopped to breath for a moment, overwhelmed by the daughter's torrent of words. "He was also at the party? Then he goes to college?" Ella asks, who has drawn her own conclusions.

Aria nods. "Yes, he's older than me. Yeah, I know Dad and you don't like it and would forbid me to date him. But you don't need that because we won't become a couple. Therefore, you don't need to worry", Aria assures her mother.

"Are you sure he doesn't care about you and that you don't mind?" Ella asks. She doesn't want to push Aria. But she sees the lower lip of her daughter trembling and knows she is being lied.

Aria sighs. "Of course, I do care. I do care about him. But I have to live with the fact that we won't be more than friends", she admits to her mother and forces herself to smile.

Ella observes Aria and still doubts that her daughter has already stopped to hope. But she doesn't want to push her and maybe she doesn't really help if she asks more questions. Perhaps she isn't able to get over him when she is always reminded of him.

"Ok", Ella murmurs finally. "If you change your mind and want to talk about this mysterious boy, I'm always there for you. You know that, don't you?"

Aria nods. "Good, then I'll let you sleep. Good night", Ella says, gently stroking her daughter's arm. "Good night, Mom", Aria murmurs softly. As soon as the door closes behind her mother, Aria drops her head on her pillow asking herself why she is doing this to herself.

 **So a little less action in this chapter but what do you think? Please tell me. Any ideas what should happen next?**

 **SPOILER*******SPOILER*******SPOILER**

 **So the finale...Twincer as AD wasn't my favorite. I hoped for Ezra, for different reasons. Alex is just nobody close to the girls. The ending of all the ships was just stupid as well. The Ezria wedding seemed forced. So much that it didn't even bothered me anymore that Aria did end up with him. The only good thing about this episode was Troian's excellent acting skills. She was amazing in that episode. :)**

 **What do you think about the finale?**


	11. Chapter 11

A new day. The same terribly quiet, yet so conspicuous murmurs that arise when Aria enters the room. If she doesn't need a cup of coffee every morning, Aria would simply hide herself until these people finally found a new topic they can talk about.

But she is definitely useless all day, when she didn't drink the warm, fragrant, brown liquid in the morning. Much to her mother's regret, who doesn't particularly like that Aria wants to drink coffee every morning since she is only sixteen.

That's why Aria often has no choice but to go to the Brew and get a mug of her addiction there. But now she actually thinks about whether she could make the next few days without coffee.

Today is a long queue in front of the counter. Apparently, a temporary help was employed, who isn't able to fulfil the demands yet. When Aria sees a young man with ash-blond hair standing in line, she holds her breath for a moment.

But she doesn't have time to analyze whether it could be him or not. Because of the murmuring behind him, Jason turns around and looks Aria directly in the eyes.

If only her heart wouldn't start racing every time she sees him. Jason nods slightly at her and forms a wordless "Hey" with his lips and smiles at her. For a moment, he looks past her and frowns as he looks into the faces of the other people in the café behind Aria.

Before turning around again, he looks at Aria for a moment and realizes how nervous she is staring at her fingers, not looking at him or anyone else. After making an order, he takes his cup from the counter and walks past Aria out of the café.

* * *

"Aria!" Aria startles as she slams the door of the Brew behind her and hears someone saying her name. "I'm sorry. I didn't want to scare you", says the familiar voice. Aria looks in the direction from which the voice came. Her eyes widen in surprise.

"Jason", she murmurs. "What are you doing here?" She asks confused. Jason has left the Brew ten minutes ago. "I've been waiting for you", Jason replies immediately, without inventing any excuses.

Aria could swear that her heart has stopped beating for a moment. "You've been waiting for me?" She asks incredulously. Jason nods but then looks embarrassed to the ground. "I was pretty sure you didn't want to have your coffee in there", Jason murmurs but clearly enough for Aria to understand every word.

This time it is Aria, who looks to the ground. But not out of embarrassment, but to not show Jason how much the gossip of the people makes her insecure.

"Forget the people", Jason says with a gentle voice. Only when she feels his warm fingers on the naked skin of her upper arm, she realizes that he has taken a step towards her. Immediately goose bumps spread all over her arm.

"Come with me. I want to show you something", he says softly. She could ask him where he wants to go with her or what he wants to show her. She could wonder that he suddenly and undoubtedly speaks to her in public. But Aria just looks up at him and nods before they slowly walk to his car.

* * *

Aria closes her eyes for a moment as she climbs out of Jason's car and the warm sun's rays shine in her face. She has no idea where they are. They have not driven very far, but they have to be on the outskirts of Rosewood.

She watches Jason as he goes to the trunk of his car and opens it. Purposefully, he reaches for a blanket and slams the trunk again. Aria looks at him irritated.

"Come with me", Jason asks her without explanation. Without a word, the two walk next to each other along a narrow path.

When they arrive at their destination, Aria holds her breath with astonishment. "Wow", she quietly says. Jason smiles but walks past Aria, who has stopped for a moment and prepares the blanket on the green grass.

The sight that is offered to Aria is breathtaking. A small lake is in front of them and the sun lets the water sparkle. Green trees surround the lake and afford shade. Wild flowers are growing in the long grass.

"It's wonderful here", she whispers so quietly that she isn't even sure whether Jason could understand her. But Jason turns around and smiles at her. At that moment, there couldn't have been a more beautiful picture for Aria. This place with this man who looks at her smiling.

Jason sits down on the blanket on the grass and lets himself fall back. He moans, as if a load is falling of him.

Hesitantly, Aria walks to him and sits down beside him on the blanket. For a minute, neither of them says a word. Aria looks to the blue water of the lake and Jason is lying there with his eyes closed, enjoying the gentle wind that strokes over the skin of his face.

"Thank you for taking me with you", Aria whispers at some point, and Jason opens his eyes and smiles. "I hoped you'd like it here", he replies. Without thinking, Aria also drops backwards and realizes that she is looking directly into his eyes now.

But she doesn't look away. She just can't turn her eyes away from him. For the first time since she knows him, he looks really a little happy. And this sight takes her breath away. Jason doesn't turn his face away from her either. Instead, he stares into her brown eyes and loses himself in them.

When Aria realizes that the tension between them is getting bigger, she turns to the side, supporting her head on her arm, to free the two from their rigidity and this awkward situation.

"So, how many women did you take to this place?" Aria asks then, wondering immediately if this question was a mistake when Jason frowns almost angrily. "What do you mean?" He asks irritated.

"Well, you go with a woman to this lake, get a blanket out of the trunk and lie down on the flowering grass at this wonderful place. I'm certainly not the first one you've been with here", Aria replies. "I know we're just friends, but anyway. How many women have been here with you?" Aria adds, forcing herself to laugh.

Jason sits up and looks out to the lake. Suddenly he looks sad and Aria regrets asking him this question. She wanted to lighten the situation, but now she feels as if she had destroyed everything.

"There was no other one here. No woman and no one else. I'm always alone here. And I have never met anyone here. That's why I never told anyone about it, because it's a place I can be alone."

Aria swallows hard. She thought this place was something quite different than it actually is to Jason. "I never wanted anybody to know about this place", Jason murmurs softly. Aria hesitates for a moment. She is afraid to ask him the next question, because she is afraid that he won't answer this question. But she is too interested in his answer.

"Why did you show me this place?" Aria asks and can't hide her astonishment. For a long time, Jason doesn't answer, as if he has to think about what he really wants to say. "I thought you could need this place just like me", he says softly, not looking at her. "And I actually like the idea that you sit here when I come here", Jason adds softly.

Even if Aria has wanted, she couldn't suppress the smile that is now spreading on her face. "This is really the nicest thing you've ever said to me", Aria says and Jason laughs as he looks at her and sees the smile on her lips.

"Well, I'm making progress, right?" He asks laughing. _You really do. Step by step_. Aria can't help but hope that he will be willing to admit that she isn't just a friend for him some time.

"The people haven't found a new story yet, huh?" Jason suddenly says and Aria just looks at him astonished. "The people in Rosewood, I mean", Jason adds and immediately Aria knows what he means. She looks ashamed to the ground.

"Don't listen to them. At some point, they will stop because there is something new and more interesting", Jason tries to encourage her. Aria plays nervously with her fingers. "Believe me, people have spoken so often about me that I know what I'm talking about", he adds when she says nothing.

Finally, Aria looks at him. When he sees the tears that watering her eyes, he moves closer to her and lays his hand comfortingly on hers. His touch feels like an electric shock that goes through her body.

"Really, it's going to be ok", he assures her again. The pressure on her hand gets firmer as a tear rolls over her cheek. "I can't stand it anymore", Aria replies with a trembling voice. "I don't even want to know what they say about me", she says, lowering her head again.

"Certainly, they are talking about the 16-year-old, who wanted to be deflowered at some party, by some guy she just met."

"Hey, come on. Don't say that. You know it's not true. It doesn't matter what the others say. Nobody who knows you, thinks about you that way", Jason assures her.

"You thought the same when you saw me at the party", she says, her voice becoming louder than she intended. Jason looks at her for a moment. Another tear flows down her cheek.

"I didn't. I was worried because you were with him. I knew what he wanted to do with you, but I also knew that that wasn't what you wanted to do with him", Jason says softly.

"I also let myself be kissed by a stranger at a party", Aria says, laughing as if she wants to show him how much he contradicts himself.

In fact, Jason laughs timidly. "Yeah, but I still have no idea why you let me kiss you. Now that I know you, I'd be sure you'd push me away", Jason replies.

Aria smiles. "I have no idea either. It just felt ... ", for a moment she searches for the right word and looks into his warm eyes. _Magical._ This is exactly the word that describes their kisses. But she doesn't dare to say it out loud to him. "It just felt right." She says and looks embarrassed. "Why did you kiss me at that party?" She asks bravely now.

"I don't like Noel and I didn't like the way he was looking at you", Jason replies. "And I liked you. I still like you", he adds, laughing.

Aria smiles at him. "And then you thought you'd keep him from kissing me by doing it yourself?" Aria asks laughing. Jason starts laughing as well. "I admit, that I've been a little bit impulsive", he says. "But I'm glad I kissed you", he adds, his eyes turning serious. "Me too", Aria replies smiling slightly, while she blushes.

* * *

"I'm really impressed that you can stop yourself from not throwing yourself all over him", Emily says without welcoming Aria when she is answering the phone call. "What do you mean?" Aria asks confused. She just got up. She has been awake for hours, but she simply didn't want to get up from bed at all.

"Haven't you seen it yet?" Emily asks, surprised. "What?" Aria asks, slightly annoyed. "The posters that are hanging all over the city", Emily explains to her friend. "What posters?" Aria asks curiously.

"Just go out of the door. I'm pretty sure there is one outside of your house, too", Emily asks her. Aria gets into her shoes arduously since she is holding the phone in her hand. Hastily she runs out of the door and actually sees a poster hanging at the tree at the side of the road in front of her house.

"You're kidding me?" Aria says loudly and stares at the paper she has just torn from the tree. "You'd like to call him and order him home, right?" Emily says, laughing.

"Em!" Aria calls indignantly into the phone. "This isn't funny at all", she warns her friend to continue to make fun of what Aria holds in her hands.

All over the city, there seem to have been hung up posters. But this time, nobody is looking for a stray cat or job as a babysitter. This time a half-naked man is pictured in the photo.

Jason looks surprised into the camera and is dressed only with a towel that covers only the most necessary. Above the picture, the headline is printed in thick, large letters.

CALL ME!

It can't be anymore flat. Underneath the picture, a short text encourages to order Jason as a naked- cleaner. His mobile phone number stands on many small pieces of paper so that anyone can tear it from the bottom of the sheet.

"I'm sorry", Emily says, who is finally able to remain serious. "Do you think he actually hung up these posters himself?" She asks doubtfully. "Of course, he didn't", Aria replies horrified, that Emily thinks he would have done it himself.

"Well, maybe he needs money to get himself ..." Emily can't end the thought herself, because she immediately gets interrupted by Aria. "To what? To buy drugs and alcohol?", Aria says angry. "Come on Aria, don't be angry. You have to admit, this suspicion isn't that unfounded", Emily tries to soothe her.

"Em, I'm going to talk to him now. I'll call you later", Aria finishes the conversation without going into the topic anymore. She can hardly hear Emily say good-bye to her when she hangs up and writes a message to him with trembling fingers.

 **Are you at home? -Aria**

Without waiting for his answer, Aria walks quickly to the house of his family. When she is almost at the doorstep, she feels the slight vibration of her mobile phone in her trouser pocket.

 **Yes, I'm home alone. -J**

With the poster in his hand, Aria rings the bell next to the door. Inside, she can hear his steps as he goes to the door. When he sees her standing on the other side of the doorstep, he can't hide his surprise. Only now he notices that she was already on her way to him.

"Hey", he greets in a soft, calm voice. Aria pushes herself past him and enters the entrance area without a word. "Have you seen this already?" She says, sounding as horrified as if she has only seen the flyer at that moment.

"This is a total impertinence. The whole city is full of it. On every damn tree, on every house wall, this piece of paper hangs. I'd love to tear any of it apart", Aria says angrily. But she becomes even more angry, when she sees Jason, who nearly suppresses a smile.

"Do you think it's funny, too?" She asks horrified, remembering her friend's reaction. "I just can't believe it! It doesn't bother you that there is a poster hanging around the city with a picture of you on which you are almost naked and looking sexy into the camera with the obvious and clear invitation to order you as a naked-cleaner? "Aria says furiously.

"You think I look sexy on that photo?" Jason teases. Surprised, Aria looks at him. "What?" She asks while she flushes immediately. "You said I look sexy?", Jason repeats his question with a smile. "This isn't the point", Aria replies angrily to avoid the topic.

Now Jason starts laughing loudly. "What is so funny at all?" Aria asks again. "Do you know who did this?" She asks. Jason remains silent and nods. "You know who did this?" Aria asks incredulously. Jason nods again. "Did you report that to the police?" Aria asks.

This time, Jason shakes his head. "You didn't?" Aria asks incredulously again. "Jason, come on. You can't let someone treat you like that. The whole town is talking about you!" She yells at him.

"You said it", Jason replies. Aria stares at him without a word. "You want everyone to talk about you?" She still asks doubtfully. Jason nods. Suddenly, Aria gets what he is trying to say. "You hung up the papers yourself, didn't you? You've distributed the posters all over the town?"

"Yes, Aria. I did that. I just made it look as if someone tricked me", Jason tells her. Again, Aria stares at him. "But why?" She murmurs silently.

"I wanted to give the people in this town new gossip", Jason replies briefly. For a moment Aria thinks about his words. "You did that for me?" She says bewildered.

"I don't care if the people in this small town are talking about me. But you do", Jason explains his actions.

Aria still stares at him. "You did this for me?" She repeats her question. Not because she wants him to simply answer with a _yes, I've done that for you_ , but because she really can't believe that he did that for her.

"I already have twenty calls. Maybe I'll think about it again and actually get into the nude business", he says, laughing as he scrolls through his cell phone.

When he looks up again, he sees Aria approaching him and putting her arms around him without hesitation. "Thank you", she whispers softly. Although he is surprised by her sudden nearness, he closes his eyes as he feels her warm body at his.

Her softly falling but uncombed curls tickle the skin of his arm. For a moment, he regrets to have told her that he doesn't want more than her friendship. For a moment, he wants to kiss her desperately.

"And now I'll help you to take the posters off again", Aria says laughing as she frees herself from the embrace and interrupts his thoughts.

 **So what do you think? I wanna thank everyone who keeps reading and reviewing my stories. THANK YOU!**


	12. Chapter 12

"If the phone rings only one more time, I'll pull the plug and throw it out of the window", Spencer threatens groaning. "The posters have been taken down for four days. Why is your phone still ringing all the time?", Spencer asks annoyed.

This is actually no exaggeration. The girls have been sitting only for half an hour in the living room of Alison's place and the phone has already rung three times. And every time there was only one reason why people called. Jason and the posters, which were distributed on the walls and trees in town.

"Hardly anyone had the chance to write down Jason's number, but everyone knows he has been the almost naked man on the poster. And everyone knows that he is my brother. That's why everyone's calling us just to remind us what a complete idiot he is", Alison replies, rolling her eyes.

"It is actually pretty stupid that he hung up the posters himself. If someone wanted to get his own back on him, ok. But hanging these embarrassing posters himself is really pitiful", Hanna agrees.

"Come on, stop it!", it suddenly bursts out of Aria because she can no longer hold back her anger. He did it for her and he doesn't deserve that the girls are talking about him like that. "You don't know why he did it", she tries to defend him.

The other girls look at her horrified. All of them except for Emily since Aria told her the truth. "Jason made a fool of my family. Probably that has been the reason why he did this", Alison suspects madly.

"I just think that ...", Aria stops herself when she sees Emily's nervous look. She crosses the line. If she'll say one more word, the girls will wonder why Aria defends Jason so vehemently. "Never mind", she murmurs, lowering her eyes.

At this moment, the girls can hear the sound of a key in the lock of the front door of the family and a moment later Jason appears in the entrance area. Without a word of greeting, he closes the door behind him and takes off his jacket.

A small plastic bag with two remaining blue pills falls to the ground. Jason picks it up so quickly that he thinks that none of the girls has seen what it has been.

But when he looks up and sees Aria's shocked face, he knows he's wrong. All the other girls continue to talk and pay no attention to him. But Aria looks at him with a frown and a questioning look. He can almost hear the thoughts in her head.

His heart beats faster as he hangs the jacket on the wardrobe with shaky fingers. Of course, she has to be the one who looks at him that moment. He wouldn't care, if any other girl would have seen the little plastic bag. Every other girl probably wouldn't even have mentioned it. It would only complete the image that his sister created of him.

But it's important for him that he is looking at Aria's shocked face. Without further notice, he climbs up the stairs to the upper floor with heavy steps. In his room, he sits down on is bed and immediately reaches for his mobile phone.

 **Please let me explain** …the words disappear as quickly from the display of his cell phone as he has tipped them in. **I didn** **'** **t**... Again, he erases the words. **It isn** **'** **t the way it looked like**...Frustrated, he throws the phone aside.

It is what it looked like. He took drugs. He didn't just drink and smoked pot, as if this isn't bad enough. No, he also swallowed one of those colorful pills. Only once. But he did. These pills weren't in his jacket pocket accidentally.

And by the way she looked at him, Jason saw that Aria also knows that he doesn't possess them by chance. He wants to go to her and talk to her immediately. And in the next moment, he hates that he feels the need to explain something to her at all.

Overwhelmed by the consciousness that she actually means so much more to him than any other person in his life, he lets himself fall on his bed and stares motionless against the ceiling.

Jason startles as the display of his mobile phone lights up and he hears a quiet vibrating sound. Without a second of hesitation, he reaches for his mobile phone and reads the message.

 **I'm leaving now. I'm waiting for you outside. -A**

Jason immediately jumps up and reaches for the door handle. But then he hesitates. If he immediately runs after her, the other girls will be suspicious. Therefore, he sits down for a moment, trying to get through a few more minutes.

Then Jason gets up and runs down the stairs. He doesn't pay attention to the other girls, who are still sitting in the living room.

Hastily, Jason looks outside for her but can't see her anywhere. With quick steps, he walks down the path, which she must go to get home, when he suddenly hears her voice. "Jason", she hisses in a muted voice.

When Jason turns his eyes to her, he sees her sitting a little hidden on the edge of the road. Although she is sitting in the middle of the town on the street visible for everyone, the place she has chosen is somewhat withdrawn and protective.

Jason sits down beside her on the green growing grass. For a long time neither of them say a word. Jason has expected that she will immediately ask him what these pills are and why he has them with him.

But Aria doesn't say anything.

And this silence makes him almost crazy. Much worse than her accusations, much worse than to hear the disappointment in her voice is the absolute silence between them, which he now has to endure.

Until he can't stand it anymore.

"You don't have to tell me I shouldn't have done that", he murmurs. Aria laughs softly because he thinks she wants to tell him this. "I know", Aria replies instead.

Irritated, Jason looks at her. "What does that mean?" He asks confused. Aria sighs audibly. "I don't think you're stupid, Jason", she says, looking straight into his eyes. "Of course, you know it was a bad idea to take these pills", she says softly. "Pill. Just one. Only once. And it has been a while ago", Jason replies.

Aria nods. "Good, then just once. What kind of pill is this anyway?", she asks quietly. "Ecstasy", Jason replies briefly. Aria nods again.

"So why?", Aria says, looking at him questioningly. Surprised by this direct question, Jason doesn't know what to say. "You know it's bad but you have done it anyway", Aria summarizes the events.

"And you ran after me because you obviously had the need to explain it to me. So why?", Aria asks and her voice sounds serious but free from any judgment.

Embarrassed, Jason looks down and pulls at the blades of grass between his feet. But this time it is him, who doesn't find the right words because he doesn't know them. Because he isn't able to admit his feelings to himself let alone to say them out loud to her.

That evening his life didn't just felt unbearably, lonely and heavy, the silence between him and Aria has been the cause, which ultimately let him suffer so miserably that he didn't see any other way. The silence and the knowledge that he has hurt her terribly with his behavior.

"I just couldn't stand myself that evening", he finally says, in a shaky voice. When she doesn't answer, he looks at her to read what she thinks in her eyes. And when he sees her anxious eyes, he immediately turns his gaze away from her again.

"You just have to say it, if you don't want any more", he murmurs softly, looking into the distance. Aria looks at him with a frown. "You don't owe me anything and you don't have to feel obligated to spend time with me. So, if you want to break up relations with me, I understand that", Jason says quietly.

"No!", Aria shouts horrified and so loudly that she looks carefully around her to see if anyone could have heard her. "What are you talking about?" She asks disbelievingly that he actually thinks she wouldn't want to have contact with him anymore.

"We're friends", she says silently. She swallows violently. These words are actually still hard for her to say. But for a very different reason than Jason thinks.

"Sometimes it's hard to see what you're doing to yourself", Aria murmurs, looking at him until he turns to look at her. "Just try to remember that I'm there for you, when you need me", she says with a shaky voice.

"You'll be sorry to say that", Jason assures her. "Let me decide", Aria replies with a forceful look. "I can decide for myself when it gets too much, okay? Even if I'm younger than you. I can handle a lot", Aria says.

"I know", Jason assures her again. "I really know that too well", he adds, unable to look at her because she actually had to endure so much.

 _Because of him._

* * *

For nothing in the world, Aria judges herself more than the fact that she can always be persuaded to go to one of these parties. She hasn't enjoyed one of them so far. She'd met Jason at the first one, but the circumstances that led her to the store room are exactly the same at each party.

At some point, she just sits down on a couch and is annoyed and just wants to be anywhere else. The other girls had already dispersed in all directions a while ago. A fact that annoyed her every time. She is always persuaded to go along, just to end up sitting alone at the party she didn't want to go.

"Aria", someone calls from behind her. She knows this voice, but she has to think for a moment to know to whom the voice belongs. When she turns around she sees Noel Kahn, who has three girls in the tow, to head for her.

"Can we sit down with you?" He asks, sitting down with his entourage on the free seats on the couch and on the floor without waiting for her answer. "It's so nice to see you here", he says somewhat too kindly for him.

Aria just forces herself to smile at him. She has no desire to talk to him. And the way he approached her doesn't suggest a good intention.

"We want to play a game and we need another player. So, is your cup filled?" He asks and Aria immediately knows what kind of game he means.

"Noel, I'm not really interested in your stupid games, so please excuse me", Aria says, trying to get up from the couch as Noel gets in her way.

"Don't play the good girl. We both know that you are not. And if you're not careful, everyone else will soon know that as well. Including Ali", he hisses at her.

For a moment, Aria stares at him. Does he really want to blackmail her? But why? Just to force her to play this stupid game with him? But actually, he scares her and she has to prevent him from chatting that she has kissed Jason at the party.

So, she lets herself fall back on the couch without an answer. "Good", Noel says contentedly and sits down again. "How about _Never have I ever_? The other girls, whom he obviously trained to admire him, are squealing by his suggestion.

"I'm starting", one of the girls screams almost in Aria's ear, so that she leans away from her. "Never have I ever gone skinny - dipping", the girl says and drinks a sip of her cup as soon as she has said the words. Another girl takes a sip and Noel also drinks. Aria, on the other hand, just holds her cup and waits for the next question.

"Never have I ever heard or seen my parents having sex", the next girl in the line says. _Thanks a lot!_ Aria really doesn't want to think about that night anymore. Immediately she remembers the night as she woke up and could hear unmistakable sounds from her parents' room. Aria takes the cup to her mouth and drinks a small sip of the beer, which is meanwhile already disgustingly warm.

The next in the row is Noel and Aria immediately notices how her heart rate accelerates and her hands are sweating. "Never have I ever kept a secret from a friend", Noel says, glancing at Aria.

His female entourage looks only puzzled at him. This question is quite harmless. Normally, Noel doesn't hesitate to ask the interesting questions. But all the girls take a sip. Including Aria, who withstands his staring look.

The next girl in the row is about to say the next question when she is interrupted by Noel. "Never have I ever made out with the sibling of a friend", he says and sounds nearly mad at her.

Aria doesn't understand what he plans by playing this game with her. The question is obviously only addressed to her. He doesn't even look at the other girls who look at each other in astonishment but continue to play the game. He knows the answer to the question. And the other girls in the round don't even know Aria. So, it makes no sense if he wants to expose her in front of them.

Aria can only laugh as she takes the mug to her mouth and takes an extra-large sip, as if she would answer for all the times she had kissed Jason.

Satisfied, Noel looks at her and prevents himself to ask the next question. "Never have I ever let myself being fucked by a man who is older than me." Aria turns his eyes away from him, disgusted by his choice of words. When she looks at him again, she can unmistakably see the anger in his eyes. He stares at her and she still owes him the answer.

Aria demonstratively puts her cup on the table and stands up without another word and lets the others alone. "To stop the game doesn't mean you said no", Noel calls after her. But Aria doesn't turn around anymore. She tries to find the mobile phone in her pocket with trembling fingers.

 **Can you pick me up?** It's hard for her to type the letters into her mobile phone. Tears blur the words in front of her eyes. She doesn't want to cry at all. She doesn't want to be angry. She doesn't want to feel as if she is doing something forbidden.

She doesn't tell anyone about her friendship with Jason. But only because she knows that Alison would do anything to prevent this friendship if she knows about it. She doesn't want anyone to tell her that she isn't allowed to see Jason.

As soon as she sends the message, she hears the sound that announces a message from Jason only a few moments later. **Is everything ok? Where are you?**

Aria notes how a smile reaches her cheeks as she reads his words, which are influenced by his care for her. **At Noels Party. I walk to the corner of the street. Can you pick me up?**

Aria repeats her question, even though Jason has already jumped off the couch and put his shoes on. Only now he realizes that he didn't clearly answer her.

 **Sure. I'm right there.** Without letting anyone know where he is planning to go, he lets the door crash into the lock. Nobody of his family is interested in asking him anyway…

Aria looks up from the phone again, as she crashes against a person. "Sorry", she murmurs as she looks up and sees Spencer's face. "Aria", she says in astonishment and obviously a bit tipsy", where are you with your thoughts?" She asks, laughing.

When she sees Aria's nervous look, the smile disappears from her face. "Are you okay?" She asked worried. Aria shakes her head hesitantly. "I don't feel well. Are you letting the others know I'm going home?" Aria asks her friend.

Spencer gently puts her hand on Aria's upper arm. "Shall I call someone? You don't go home alone, do you?" She asks. Aria shakes her head again. "No, I called my father. Don't worry. It's just the bad memories", she says and actually her friend nods sympathetically.

When they persuaded Aria to come along, they didn't even think about what she'd experienced at the last party just a week ago. Of course, this party would bring back the memories.

"I'll go outside. My father is certainly there any minute", Aria says, so she doesn't have to let Jason wait for her at their meeting place and he only worries unnecessarily. "Are you sure I shouldn't accompany you?" Spencer asks worried. But Aria shakes her head.

"Don't worry so much. I'll write you when I'm home. It's really ok", she assures Spencer. Spencer hugs her friend again. "Come home safely. And I insist on the message when you're there", she says as she turns around and disappears into the crowd.

* * *

Relieved, Aria sighs as she sees the lights of Jason's car appearing behind the curve. Although she can't see anybody, she turns around again before she quickly climbs into his car and sits down on the passenger seat.

"Hey", he greets her softly. Only when she looks at him directly and she forces herself to smile, he starts the engine and drives off. "Are you feeling sick?" He asks as Aria remains silent. Aria shakes her head. "No, I'm ok. Physically I mean", she replies.

With a worried look, Jason looks at her, until he drives to the right side of the street and stops the engine. He wants to focus fully on her and hear why he should pick her up.

"What happened, Aria?" He asks, waiting while Aria is staring out of the window.

"You know it was Noel's party, don't you?" She asks him to make sure. Jason nods and tries not to let her notice how little he likes that Aria has been at his party. And not only because of the events at the last party.

"And you remember who was standing next to us when you first kissed me?" She asks, looking out the window as she plays nervously with her fingers. Without saying the name, Jason can answer the question. _Noel Kahn._

With this realization, Jason buries his face in his hands and moans angrily. "What did he do?" He asks Aria and she can tell by the sound of his voice that Jason is very tense.

Aria tells him in detail and with a trembling voice what happened at the party. The look with which Noel looked at her, when he threatened her to tell everything she kept as a secret and treasured as her most precious thing in her life, has scared her a lot.

And the look with which he stared at her and asked her indirectly whether she had slept with Jason, left her confused. Why does he ask her this and what does it matter to him at all?

When Aria ends her report, Jason doesn't say a word for a long time. Instead, Aria can see that his right hand has clenched to a fist and how tense his jaw is. "Is he still at the party?" Jason finally asks and Aria has trouble understanding him, because he doesn't even look at her.

Aria looks skeptically at him. "I don't know, probably", she replies uncertainly. "Good", Jason mutters, trying to reach for the door of the car as Aria understands what he's up to and puts her hand on his clenched fist.

"Jason, what are doing?" She asks nervously. "I'll make him talk. He doesn't get away with it", he hisses angrily. "Please don't", Aria says almost begging him. "Maybe he won't tell anyone and especially not Ali. He kept our secret for the last months. He probably just wanted to scare me", Aria says, trying to be as convincing as possible.

"If you go back to the party, everyone will see that you talk to him and then everyone will talk about why you defended me. And Noel will know that we still have so much contact that I called you right away", Aria adds desperately.

For a moment, Jason looks directly into her pleading eyes. "I need you now", she finally whispers. He won't let Noel escape. But Aria is right and Jason knows he needs to find another way. So, he starts the engine and drives Aria home safely.

 **What do you think? Will Jason confront Noel? And why did Noel act that way? Please tell me your thoughts :)**


	13. Chapter 13

Jason looks worried after Aria until she finds the key in her handbag and inserts it into the lock and opens the door. She doesn't look back at him because she isn't even aware that he is still sitting in his car at the side of the street or that he is looking after her.

Aria feels as if the evening has sucked the energy out of her body. In fact, she was afraid of the evening. More than she would have ever admitted. Because of the events of the past week she has brooded very long whether she should let herself be persuaded into going to another party so soon.

In fact, these fears weren't unfounded. Noel and the game, which he has played with her, ran her off the course. She just wants to go to bed and creep up the stairs as quietly as possible, so that she doesn't wake up anybody.

Tomorrow, she'll have to explain to her parents why she hasn't slept at Alison's place. But a sudden headache will surely already be reason enough without her parents worrying too much or without forcing her to explain herself further.

Although Jason knows that it is already a risk to have driven Aria to the front door, if only the wrong person passes at the right moment, he doesn't manage to start the engine, as she has long disappeared behind the walls of the house.

He doesn't understand how she could decide to go back to a party so soon. Not after what happened at the last one. If he had known what she was up to, he would have stopped her. Above all, he would have prevented her from going to Noel's party.

Even if Noels is harmless, his intentions regarding Aria aren't that innocent. Noel stood in front of her as Jason pressed his lips on hers. It was Noel, whom he pushed away from her because he realized that she felt uncomfortable near him and she didn't seem to share his intentions.

Aria looked tired and upset at the same time tonight. As if she needs someone to support her because otherwise she would have collapsed in front of him. She looked so nervous as if she needed someone to hold her and soothe her.

Nevertheless, something keeps him from being the one who holds her and soothes her and assures her that he is reassembling each of her parts into a whole. They are friends. They have agreed to be friends. And that should legitimate every action he would like to do so badly.

Every minute that she sat next to him in the car and silently looked out of the window, while he drove silently along the streets to her parents' house, he has searched for the words that made her forget the words of Noel.

Every second, he thought about just grabbing over the center console and taking her hand and responding to her smile she would have given him.

Instead, he remained silent and held the steering wheel with both hands, always straight ahead, so that he didn't get the idea to turn around and take Noel to task.

It doesn't even sound music out of the car radio as Jason drives through the silence of the night. Only the headlights and a few streetlights break the darkness with their bright light. And her trembling voice still sounds in his ears when she told him what happened at the party.

* * *

For a moment, he doubts that the figure really sits on the steps of his parents' porch as he stops the car and the engine. But even after he has screwed up his eyes, which feel heavy because of his fatigue, Ian is still sitting on the bright wood. Next to him is standing a six-pack beer. He holds one bottle already in his hand and lifts it as he sees Jason.

Sighing, Jason gets out of his car. He doesn't want to spend time with Ian. He wants to go to bed. He wants to suppress the thoughts of Aria in a deep sleep. And he doesn't want to talk to anyone tonight anymore.

"You don't keep a good friend waiting for you", Ian says to him. Jason looks at him angrily. "Be quiet", he hisses angrily. Meanwhile it is after midnight and even if he knows that his sister isn't at home, he hopes at least that his parents are sleeping and therefore didn't notice that the girls haven't carried out their agreement once again.

"We haven't arranged to meet", he replies angrily, but is sitting down next to Ian on the porch. "What do you want?" Jason asks annoyed.

"Wow, you're in a good mood", Ian replies sarcastically. "I thought I'd like to visit my good old buddy if he can't find time to call me", Ian says and Jason isn't sure if he's really disappointed or just bored enough to meet him in the middle of the night.

"I was busy", Jason replies briefly. "Busy to play the hero and save the little girls from the bad guys?" He asks and Jason can hear that Ian is making fun of him.

"Come on, shut up", Jason whispers angrily. "Goodness, you can't even stand a joke. You became really sensitive", Ian replies. "Was it of use for you? Did she let you do it with her?"

As soon as he asked this question, Ian feels the push against his shoulder, which hits him so surprisingly that he loses his balance and bangs with the upper body against the wooden pillar next to him. "Are you sick or something?" Jason whispers, while Ian doesn't understand why his friend is so upset.

"I could ask you the same", Ian hisses angrily, rubbing his aching shoulder. "What's wrong with you? Does she keep you dangling or what is your fucking problem?" Ian asks. Jason just stares at him. His eyes sparkle from anger.

When he sees the way, Ian is looking at him, Jason knows he has to calm down to keep his secret from him. He breathes deeply a few times without notice of Ian. "Aria is Alison's friend. That's all. I don't want anything from her. She's much too young", Jason says finally, staring at his shoes.

He is always afraid that his gaze, every emotion in his face, will betray his lies. "Alison was desperate and needed my help. And this asshole couldn't get away with mixing drugs into the drinks of the girls", he whispers, still not looking at Ian.

"Ok, so what's her name?" Ian asks impatiently. Jason looks at him confused. "Come on, Jason. You haven't called or talked to me since days. The only explanation I can accept is that you get laid every night", Ian says and suddenly Jason feels so far away from his friend.

"Where have you been?" Ian asks, noticing Jason was coming home in the middle of the night and is obviously sober. "It doesn't concern you", Jason hisses, without bothering to make any excuse.

"Slowly, I really doubt that it has to do with a woman. Otherwise your mood wouldn't be so miserable", Ian murmurs, before taking a large sip of his beer.

"Take a beer. I like you better when you're drunk", Ian finally says, holding out a beer to Jason. Hesitantly Jason takes the cold beer into his hand and stares at it.

The reason they met so little lately, is of course Aria. And that is exactly what he realizes now. He realizes how much time he spends with her. And each of these evenings, each of these hours, has kept him from drinking.

As if the reason why Jason doesn't start to drink is that he can't open the bottle, Ian takes his bottle-opener out of his pocket. He takes Jason's bottle out of his hand and opens it with ease. Ian gives him the bottle back. "Drink!"

Finally, Jason drinks and they empty the six bottles so fast that Ian taps him proudly on the shoulder. "Come on, we need supplies. Finally, you are yourself again." Jason trudges after him and wonders if Ian is right. Perhaps he is much more himself than he is in Aria's presence ...

* * *

Jason suspects that this night will turn out badly, as he can feel the vibrations of the bass of the loud music in his body. It is difficult for him to keep the orientation. The alcohol has an enormous effect. But when he hears the music, he knows which house they are heading for.

Jason stops abruptly and doesn't move a step further. Ian walks until he realizes he's going to the front door without Jason. "What's going on?" He asks as he turns around and sees Jason staring at the house.

"I can't go in there", Jason replies with a staring look and without any explanation. "Are you kidding?" Ian asks. "There is free alcohol in that house! Let's go! Come on", Ian asks him again. But Jason is still rooted to the spot.

They are standing in front of the cabin of the Kahn family. The loud music is part of Noels Party. Noel is in there and celebrates himself gloriously while Aria sat completely devastated in his car. He can't meet him now. He promised her.

"Name me one damn reason why you can't go in there and drink yourself into oblivion", Ian says annoyed. But Jason just stares at him without a word. He can't tell him what is going on with him. Even if he wanted.

It isn't just her secret. It isn't just his secret. It is also this fucking chaos in his head when he thinks of her. And Ian is definitely not the one with whom he can discuss his thoughts. Unless he wants to be laughed at mockingly.

"Never mind", Jason says, shaking his head as if he wants to free himself out of his stiffness and as if he wants to shake the thoughts of Aria out of his head. "Let's go", he finally says, walking past Ian, not hesitating any moment longer.

Satisfied, Ian looks at him as Jason walks through the entrance door of the cabin and the babble of voices sounds between the loud music. Immediately when they've entered the cabin Ian heads for the next girl, who greets and hugs him happily and he doesn't recognize Jason any longer.

Jason gets a big beaker of beer and heads for the back door just as purposefully. Since Ian no longer pays attention to him anyway, he can spend the rest of the night protected in silence, which hopefully will save him from doing something stupid.

Relieved, that he escaped the noise and the people so quickly, he lets himself sink to the ground against the wall of the cabin. The beer tastes stale and warm and the night is cold, even if it is still in the middle of summer. Nevertheless, he enjoys the silence and darkness of the night much more than the hustle and bustle of the party.

He takes a big sip when he hears the giggle of a female voice. Curiously, he turns his head to the direction from which the voice came and sees a couple sitting closely on a wooden bench. Perhaps they just got to know each other. They probably have.

As little as he is interested in who the two are, so less as he is interested in what the two do, so much he remembers the evening, when he met Aria and they sat together on this bench.

Her delicate, warm voice resounds in his ear, as if he has turned back time and as if she is sitting next to him right now.

 _I can_ _'_ _t believe I'm doing this._

He can remember her smile when she whispered these words to him. And without even realizing it himself, Jason closes his eyes to remember her smile a bit better.

Relaxed, he is leaning against the wall of the cabin as he thinks of her soft lips, which she placed so carefully on his. He can remember that he took her hand because it was shaking.

"I can't believe it!" Jason startles, when he hears that voice. Annoyed, he rolls his eyes when he sees Noel Kahn standing directly in front of him. Immediately, he notices how his relaxation is replaced by the tension of his body. He suspects that this will turn out badly.

By the way Noel is looking at him, Jason can see how much Noel enjoys looking down at him. It suits his character. Arrogant and high-handed.

"I really didn't think the others were telling the truth when they told me you entered my party", he says and Jason doesn't miss the mocking undertone.

"So, she ran straight to you", Noel notes. He has drawn his own conclusions from Jason's visit at his party. It is no coincidence that Jason is here. Noel is just confused that Jason is sitting alone in his garden. Noel expected Jason to confront him immediately.

Jason doesn't respond to his words and just stares to the ground silently. He wants to prevent Noel from recognizing a minimal reaction in his face that would reveal his secret and he knows that it is easier for him to maintain control if he doesn't look at Noel.

"You of all people. I can't believe it", Noel says, shaking his head in disbelief. For a moment, there is silence between the two men and Jason knows that Noel is waiting for a reaction from him.

"I have no idea about what or about whom you're talking about", he finally murmurs without looking at Noel. Noel starts laughing loudly. "Don't fool me", he hisses and Jason wonders why Noel is suddenly so angry.

"At least admit it!" Noel shouts. Now Jason looks up, because he no longer understands Noel's reaction. Sure, he kissed Aria in front of his eyes, although that was obviously his plan, but this reaction is disproportionately vehement for a bit of injured vanity.

"What's your problem, Noel?" Jason asks. "My problem, my damn problem?", Noel turns away from him and kicks an empty mug lying on the lawn. "You're a huge asshole, who can't even admit that you're dating her", he murmurs, but still so loud that Jason can hear him.

Jason has absolutely no idea what Noel's behavior caused. "You are not only a total failure", Noel cries so loud that Jason believes that soon people will come outside to find out what's going on, even though the music is still so loud that you don't have to be inside the cabin to listen to it.

"You aren't able to put things straight. You go to college from time to time. Seemingly, no idea. You are drinking and smoking pot all the time. Now you are sitting completely drunk in front of me." Still, Noel cries angrily.

"Anyway", Noel cries so loudly that his voice almost cracks. "Still, you came, the biggest failure in town, to her and just kissed her and then that's it. Apparently, you deceived her completely", Noel accuses him.

Apparently, he himself is completely drunk. Even if Jason doesn't know him very well, he has never seen him like this before. And even if he would like to say that it isn't like that, he can't deny that Noel hit a sore spot with his words.

He can feel that his heart is beating faster and his muscles tense in his body. The rage rises in him and he doesn't even know who he is really angry at.

Noel stands in front of him and yells at him with full rage. And even if Jason doesn't really understand the reason for this anger, he can't even claim that he is angry at Noel. Rather, he is angry at himself. Because Noel is right.

"You are a drunkard, a pot-head, a failure. You are the mockery of the whole town. Ali is ashamed that you are her brother! And she's dating you", Noel cries, pointing cynically at him.

"Aria is falling for you!" Noel repeats, laughing mockingly. But he isn't only making fun of Jason, but also of himself. He can only mock at himself because Aria prefers Jason. Jason knows he has to go. He shouldn't sit and listen to these words.

Jason doesn't even want to beat Noel. If he could, he'd beat himself. Or he would hit against a stone wall for hours. He would see the blood on his hands and hear the bones breaking. But it would make the pain in him more bearable.

Jason tries to get up. A slight dizziness overcomes him. He starts to walk in the direction of the back door. He will fight his way through the crowd and then he will go straight home. He has to remain reasonable now.

"Sure, you're leaving now. You can't even defend yourself. You just let me insult you and you can't even be man enough to defend yourself", Noel shouts behind him.

"I've no idea why she likes you. Probably she just likes it, when you fuck her! Actually, she's just a little slut!" Noel says, looking provocatively after him.

Jason stops abruptly. For a moment, the night is silenced and the music no longer echoes in his ears. It is as if it has been simply turned off. Although, the music is booming in exactly the same volume out of the boxes as a few seconds before. But Jason only hears Noel's words again and again- every time a bit louder.

The next sound he hears is the sound of his fist on Noel's cheek and his impact on the ground and his own steps in the sand as he turns around and leaves the party.

 **What do you think? How will Aria react? Please tell me what you're thinking about this chapter :)**


	14. Chapter 14

Aria blinks against the sun that shines brightly into her room. Nothing of what happened last night can be imagined on this sunny summer day. Sleepy, Aria rubs her eyes. When she glances at her alarm clock, she notices how many hours she has slept.

It is already 11:23 am, when Aria stretches her arms, in order to become awake. But when she closes her eyes again for a moment, the memories flash into her memory. She sees Noel sitting in front of her with his mocking grin and her heart instantly begins to speed up again.

Aria buries her face at her blanket as someone quietly knocks at the door. "Yes?" Aria asks, pulling the blanket out of her face again. The door opens and the face of her mother appears.

"Good morning", she says softly. "Morning", Aria mutters in a sleepy voice. "Did you have an argument?" Her mother asks and Aria wonders for a moment what and who she could think of until she realizes that she actually wanted to stay with her friends at Alison's place.

Aria shakes her head. "No, I just didn't feel well and wanted to sleep at home", she explains. Ella nods understandingly. "Are you feeling better?" She asks worried. "Yes, I'm fine. Don't worry", Aria replies.

Ella nods, smiling. "Breakfast is in the fridge, sleepy head", she says laughing before closing the door again. Aria falls back on her pillow. Without looking, she grabs for her mobile phone on the bedside table next to her bed.

As she looks at the display with still sleepy eyes, she is instantly wide-awake. She got a message from Jason. With a pounding heart and trembling fingers, she opens the message and startles as she reads his words.

There are only a few words, just a short string of letters. But they let her suspect something bad happened.

 **I'm sorry.**

Only these words, no more. No explanation what that is supposed to mean. Nothing at all.

She throws the blanket back and nearly jumps out of her bed. Nervously, she dials his number. But apart from the recurring ringing tone, she doesn't hear anything. He doesn't answer the call.

She's typing a message into her mobile phone hurriedly.

 **What happened? What are you sorry for? Please call me!**

Her uneasiness becomes even bigger when she sees that he has written this message several hours after he has dropped her off at her doorstep. What happened in the meantime?

Without thinking, she grabs the first clothes she finds and puts them on. An incredible fear rises up in her. What did he do and what is his message supposed to mean?

She looks into the mirror one more time and brushes her hair. Then she reaches for her backpack, which stands on the chair in front of her desk and runs straight out of her room and down the stairs.

Hastily, she slips into her sneakers, as her mother walks around the corner worried because she has been aware of the loud rumbling. "What's going on?" She asks irritated. Aria looks at her mother, as if she hasn't remembered that she isn't alone in the house.

"I have to go", Aria replies briefly. Ella looks at her daughter in astonishment. "Don't you want to eat breakfast?" She asks. "Or go back to the bathroom before you leave the house?" She adds, looking down at her daughter and wondering about her interesting choice of clothes and her pale face.

Aria just shakes her head without a word. Ella is getting worried. She hasn't seen her daughter like this before. Gentle but determined, she puts her hands on Aria's shoulders. "Hey, what's going on?" She asks, forcing her daughter to look at her.

"You've just been lying completely relaxed in bed and now you are running out of the house as if someone is behind you", she says. Aria forces herself to calm down. She doesn't want to answer questions now. She has too many of her own.

But she knows that she has to convince her mother everything is all right. The faster she can go. "I just have to go to see Ali. I need my things, which are still at her place. I forgot them yesterday", she says calmly.

Of course, she keeps quiet about the fact that she wasn't even at Alison's yesterday, but came directly from a party.

"And that's so urgent that you can't even eat something?" Ella asks concerned. Aria just nods. "It's my notebook. You know, I'm lost without that", she says, laughing insecurely. Ella looks skeptically at her daughter for a moment, but then her face relaxes. In fact, she knows that the notebook in which her daughter writes all her literary ideas is Aria's little treasure.

"Ok, if you think you have to do that", Ella says, letting her hands sink from her daughter. Aria gives her mother a kiss on the cheek and quickly leaves the house before her mother thinks of even more questions. Of course, she doesn't want to go to Alison because she needs this notebook so urgently. Even if this is indeed her most valuable possession. She needs answers. And maybe Alison can give her some.

* * *

"Aria!" Alison greets her with her usual high voice and a bright smile. Aria tries to force herself to smile. She has to try to figure out why Jason apologizes to her without Alison becoming suspicious.

"Hey", Aria replies softly. "Come in!" Alison asks. Aria replies with a timid smile and steps into the imposing house. "How are you? Spencer told me that you didn't feel well?" She asks, sounding really worried.

"I'm fine", Aria replies quickly. "It was just a bit overwhelming", she adds silently. Alison looks at her sympathetically. When Spencer told her that Aria had gone home, Alison really felt guilty. Actually, she should have known that Aria doesn't want to go to another party yet. But she ignored her fears and persuaded her.

"How was the party after I left?" Aria asks Alison casually. "Great", Alison replies, "until my brother entered the party", she adds, rolling her eyes annoyed.

Immediately, Aria listens carefully. She hasn't expected to hit the mark that quickly. But now she realizes how her heart beats faster. Jason has been at the party. Although she asked him not to go.

"Jason punched Noel", Alison says, interrupting Aria's thoughts. Aria stares at her friend with dilated eyes. "What?" She says incredulously. "He came to the party completely drunk and punched Noel. After that he has been the main topic of all the conversations and everyone plied me with questions all night, as if I had any idea what was going on in his head", Alison replies angrily.

"You don't know why Jason punched him?" Aria asks cautiously. She suspects what the reason might have been. But Alison just shakes her head. "No, he left immediately and Noel doesn't want to talk about it", Alison explains.

Aria is relieved. At least nobody knows the reason for this fight. She just hopes that Noel doesn't change his mind and won't tell anyone what has happened. But actually, she fears that he wants to punish them for what Jason did.

"And you haven't seen Jason today?" Aria asks carefully again. "No, I think he slept here. But he got up early this morning, got into his car and left. No idea. He took some clothes with him. Who knows when he will come back. I don't care", Alison replies as uninterested as possible. But after she has said the words, she stares into the distance for a moment and seems thoughtful.

"He left?" Aria makes sure that she heard Alison right and she feels the lump growing bigger in her throat. Alison nods, without looking at Aria. "As always, when it gets difficult", Alison murmurs sighing.

 **Please call me... Let's talk.**

She has already written countless messages to him. Every day. Multiple times.

He hasn't answered so far.

Every morning, she reaches for her mobile phone first and every night, she hopes until the second, in which she falls into a restless sleep, that he answers only once. That he'll send her only a small sign that he is doing well.

But she has hoped in vain. For five days. On Saturday was the party and now it is Thursday. Every day she becomes even more nervous. Every day, she tries a bit more to hide how big her concern for Jason is.

But she knows she isn't the only one who is really worried. Alison seems to be getting more and more nervous every day as well. Even though she would never admit that, she seems to be sleepless at night. The dark shadows under her eyes betray her every morning.

Her smile is a little more pretended every day and her good mood is so fake, that almost everyone noticed something is up. Aria has seen several times that tears burn in her eyes. But she knows she shouldn't ask Alison in front of the others. Alison wouldn't forgive her.

That's why she grasps the chance when she sees Alison sitting alone in the Brew. She sits alone in the farthest corner of the café. Aria knows that it is a risk. Alison shows no weakness and she especially hides the care for her brother. But maybe she is grateful when she doesn't have to play the unapproachable sister all the time.

"Hey", Aria greets her cautiously because Alison looks deepened at her phone and apparently didn't notice that Aria walked to her. In fact, Alison startles and looks at Aria with dilated eyes.

But her eyes are not only frightened but also reddened with tears. For a moment Aria holds her breath. She guessed Alison is worried. Alison, however, only realizes at this moment that her emotional situation hasn't been undetected.

And Aria doesn't know how her friend will react to this realization. Maybe she will get angry and wants to be alone. Perhaps she runs out of the café and covers her face in shame.

But instead, Alison lowers her gaze and sighs. She feels caught. It is hard for her to show the girls her weaknesses. But she also knows that it would be stupid to deny it now.

"Hey", she whispers softly. "Can I sit down?" Aria asks cautiously. Alison nods silently. As inconspicuously as possible, she wipes a tear from the corner of her eye. Aria knows how difficult it is for her to always hide the feelings.

She wants to give her friend the feeling that she doesn't have to do that in her presence. That's why Aria is searching in her handbag and handing Alison a handkerchief with an understanding smile.

In fact, she knows exactly how Alison feels. The same feelings, the same worries torment her for days. Only that Alison isn't allowed to know that ...

Aria feels badly at that thought. Her friend, who always pretends to be so strong, sits next to her and shows her a completely different side of her and she pretends that Jason is no more for her than Alison's brother. She is the only one who is still lying at the moment.

"Did Jason call you?" Aria asks cautiously. Alison just shakes her head without a word and another tear runs down her cheek to her chin.

 _He didn_ _'_ _t call me either…_ As much as Aria would love to tell her the truth, she still knows she can't exaggerate Alison's short hint of weakness. Alison would never react to Aria's feelings for her brother with understanding or acceptance.

"Why can't he answer at least once so I know he's okay", Alison murmurs softly but Aria can still hear the despair in her voice. Aria gently puts an arm around her friend.

"I'm sure he's ok", Aria whispers quietly, not even knowing who she wants to calm down. She has already imagined the worst scenarios in her thoughts and rarely does she still believe that everything is all right.

"I'm just so scared because ..." Alison hesitates for a moment because her voice cracks. "The last time he was gone for days ... We got a call and it was an employee of a hospital."

Alison breathes deeply before she continues. "He was taken into hospital with an alcohol poisoning. Miles away from Rosewood. My father and Jason have argued before. I heard every word at night when I was lying in bed. And then Jason slammed the door and he was just gone for days. Just like now", she says, sighing.

This is one of the scenarios that Aria has imagined, and she is very concerned about the fact that this case has actually already happened once. Desperately, she tries to hide her own tears, so Alison doesn't realize how close the two friends are in their care for Jason.

"Sorry", Alison says suddenly. She straightens up and wipes the tears from her cheeks. "I didn't want to howl in front of you", she adds with a laugh. "Don't worry. He's your brother. Of course, you're worried about him", Aria replies with a compassionate smile.

For a moment, Alison looks at her silently, as if she'd just realized by Aria's words how much she really loves her brother. But then suddenly she reaches for her bag and gets up.

"I ... I have to go", she says hastily. She wants to turn around and leave as she looks at Aria again. "You won't tell anyone about this, will you?" She says, and Aria isn't sure if this is really supposed to be a question or an order. But Aria just nods. Because Alison wouldn't have been satisfied with any other answer.

Sighing Aria reaches for her bag. It was a beginning. It was much more than Alison has revealed so far. Aria can't expect more from her.

Aria looks around the café to find a place where she can work on her notebook. But as she looks up and looks to the entrance of the café, she looks into the surprised and euphoric face of a tall blond woman.

Again, it overwhelms Aria, how similar Cece looks to Alison. Cece runs up to her with the same radiant smile as Alison always does.

"How small this town is! You always see well-known faces", she says, evidently full of joy. But Aria can't help but ask herself if Cece is able to be joyful honestly and with all her heart.

"Arielle, right?" Cece asks with a frown. "Aria", she corrects. "Right, right. I'm sorry. How are you, Aria?", the blonde asks but she continues to talk so fast that Aria doesn't have the chance to answer her question at all.

"Oh God, how stupid of me. I heard what happened at that party. You poor thing", she says. Aria can't stand the pitiful look with which Cece looks at her. "That was really shabby to attack a young girl like you. So young and innocent."

As if she still can't comprehend what has happened, Cece shakes her head helplessly. Aria, on the other hand, has to pull herself together, not to answer her snotty, as much as Cece has emphasized how young she is.

"But it was really impressive how Jason helps the friends of his little sister", Cece says, and she laughs as if she actually thinks it has been ridiculous. "Well, you're such a sworn gang, you're probably all little sisters to him", she adds, laughing.

Aria would like to yell at her. If Cece doesn't stop soon, Aria won't be able to hold back her anger. She almost wonders if Cece is aware of what Jason and her are doing, as much as she always emphasizes that Aria is actually much younger than him.

"One of his good moments", she murmurs, sighing. "Did you hear that he hit Noel at a party?" She asks, as if the whole town hasn't already talked about Noel's black eye and Jason, who hasn't been in town for days and who is seemingly to blame for this.

Nevertheless, Aria nods hesitantly. "That's just like him!", Cece says harshly. Aria just hopes that she will finally stop and go.

"I really don't know what I've liked about him", she says. But Aria wonders what Jason actually liked about her. "Well, he has his qualities. I can't deny that", she says, and Aria wants to stops her ears when she starts laughing loudly.

"You know, what I mean. Although you certainly don't know. You have certainly never been able to experience how it is when a man really knows what he is doing. Perhaps you're still a bit young", Cece notes and Aria sees her own knuckles whiten.

"All right, I have to go. I'm very busy", Cece says. Aria tries not to laugh. What seems to sound like she is an important person who has deigned to give Aria some of her precious time is really nothing more than the ridiculous attempt to make herself more important than she is.

Cece leans briefly down to Aria, who is still trying to control her emotions, places a hand on her back half-handedly as if she were hugging her and kisses her cheeks right and left. With an impressive twist of the pelvis she walks off on her high heels.

 **What do you think?**

 ***MAYBE SPOILER ALERT* I just want to say that Cece isn't Charlie in my story. She is just Jason's ex-girlfriend and no relative. I really didn't like that incest thing :D**


	15. Chapter 15

_Day 7._

One whole week.

It's already Saturday and Jason still hasn't called or messaged her.

Aria is torn between the feelings of sorrow and anger. Sometimes she is just angry. How can he cause that they are so worried about him? And she isn't thinking about herself, but also about his sister, who has shown feelings that never came to light before. How can he cause that they lay awake all night?

Just one little message.

The shortest answer would be enough for her.

But nothing has happened.

"Aria!" Aria can hear the shout of her brother, running up the stairs and finally walking into her room without knocking.

"You have a visit", Mike informs her briefly. After that he just walks into his own room. He didn't even see her astonished face. Actually, she doesn't expect anyone. Except it is ...

At the thought that he might be waiting for her downstairs, Aria stands up and hurries down the stairs. But when she arrives downstairs and she sees the person standing in the corridor, the joy instantly leaves her face. So much that his smile disappears as well when he realizes how disappointed she is.

"Noel", she murmurs silently. "What do you want?" Aria asks severely. Noel looks down to the ground and plays nervously with his fingers. "What I did at the party ...", he begins to stammer. But Aria immediately pushes him out of the door. Not because she wants to get rid of him, but because she can't talk about what happened in her parents' house.

"Are you crazy?" She asks. "My parents don't know about the party and they would bite my head off if they know I was at your party after they had to pick me up at the hospital last time", she whispers. Nervously, Noel looks at her. "I'm sorry. I didn't think about it", he apologizes silently.

"So, what do you want?", Aria asks again annoyed. Ashamed, Noel lowers his face. "So, what happened at the party wasn't ok and I'm sorry", he says quietly. For a moment, Aria watches him closely and considers if he really is serious about his excuse. Finally, she sighs audibly.

"Come on, let's have a walk", Aria says, smiling slightly at him. Noel nods relieved. But the mood between them remains tense. When they are a few steps away from her parents' house, Noel tries to apologize to her again.

"The game at the party wasn't ok. And it wasn't ok what I said to Jason about you. This one", Noel points a finger at his eye, which is still surrounded by bruises, "I've really deserved."

Aria doesn't answer him. For seven days, she could only guess what happened that night, when Jason hit Noel. But now she actually has the chance to get answers.

"And it wasn't okay what I said about Jason as well", he says without looking at Aria. This excuse was the most difficult for him. But Aria still doesn't answer him and Noel is afraid she won't accept his apology.

But instead, Aria broods about his words. Actually, she doesn't want to let him know that Jason isn't answering her messages. It's none of his business whether they still have contact or not. But at the moment, the answers to her questions are much more important to her.

"Are you telling me what happened at the party?" Aria asks quietly. Noel looks at her irritated. He expected that Jason already told her why he hit him. He had assumed that Jason had set himself up as her hero, who had to defend her. "Didn't he tell you?" Noel asks.

Aria shakes her head silently. "I haven't heard from him since that night", she said, with a trembling voice. Noel immediately feels the need to hold her in his arms. He could hear the grief and pain clearly in her voice.

But instead, he keeps the distance between them and just fulfils her wish. "It was after 2 am. The party was at its peak and the level of alcohol in my blood probably synonymous", he adds and laughs briefly, but Aria doesn't join in it, so he continues.

"A few people have told me that Ian and Jason have entered my party."

 _Ian._

Noel observes Aria, who has been holding her breath when she heard this name. Of course, it was Ian. Slowly Aria can put the little pieces of her knowledge together.

"I immediately thought that you ran to him after I played this game with you and told him everything and that he wanted to confront me", Noel justifies his behavior. "But I think that this wasn't his plan", he adds silently.

After that night, Noel had actually thought about how much guilt he himself had on his injury and he had come to the realization that he must have misinterpreted Jason's behavior from the beginning. There was a reason he'd sat alone in the garden.

"I found him sitting alone in the garden. He just sat there with his half-full mug of beer. I haven't said nice things about him", Noel admits shamefacedly. "And I didn't say nice things about you either. I didn't mean what I said and I'm glad you don't know a word. I will definitely not repeat anything. Not now and not ever", he promises.

Even though he wouldn't call Jason his friend, Noel knows that his words were hard and he wasn't allowed to judge Jason. And he wasn't allowed to say these things about Aria of course.

"I think the insults against him didn't matter to him. That made me even more angry. That is why I said these things about you. I wanted to test if he would at least defend you. And then he punched me."

For a few moments, Noel and Aria just walk along the path in silence. Aria tries to assimilate the information she has received from Noel and Noel watches her patiently and waits until she says something.

"Why you did all of that? Why were you so mad at me and him?" Noel stopped immediately when he heard her question. "Come on", Noel says incredulously. "I don't really have to explain it, do I?"

Aria looks at him irritated. If he thinks that his behavior is totally obvious to her, he is mistaken. For her his behavior makes no sense at all.

"I like you, Aria", Noel says softly. "Very much", he adds, rubbing his neck embarrassed. "And I thought you liked me, too. At least until he pushed me away from you and you disappeared with him the rest of the night", he whispers, but so loudly that Aria can understand every word.

Suddenly she sees him in a different way. She hasn't been aware that he actually has an honest interest in her. Only now does she realize how hurtful her behavior must have been that night. Only now does she realize that Noel has been jealous all the time.

"Noel", she says gently, laying a hand on his forearm. "I'm sorry. I didn't realize your feelings for me have been that serious", she says. This time it's Aria, who hopes that he will accept her apology.

"It's all right", Noel replies with a timid smile. "I guess I have to accept that you are with him now", he says, sighing. But this doesn't seem to be a new realization for him, but a fact with which he has tried to cope the last weeks.

But Aria shakes her head frantically. "We're not together", she says quickly. Noel looks at her in astonishment. "Come on, you don't have to lie to me. I know it already anyway. I won't tell anyone. Don't worry", he replies, laughing.

But again, Aria shakes her head. "We're just friends", she said with such a determined voice that you could almost think she believes herself.

But Noel watches her closely for a few moments. Although he can't claim to know Aria very well, he immediately knows that she is lying to him or at least that there is something she isn't telling him. "I don't believe you", he says, laughing.

"Believe it or not. It's the truth", Aria says angrily, walking a few steps ahead. "You aren't dating him?", Noel repeats his question skeptically. "No", Aria replies.

"You're single?" Noel asks just to make sure. "Yes", Aria replies still annoyed. Noel still didn't catch up and walks a few steps behind her. "Would you go out on a date with me?" Noel asks cautiously.

"No", Aria says so quickly and without looking at him that she is ashamed for her answer the next moment. After what he confessed to her only minutes earlier, her response has been disproportionately mean of her.

Abruptly she stopped walking and looks at him ashamed. "I'm sorry", she says with a pleading expression on her face. "It just slipped out." But to her relief, Noel smiles at her.

"It was probably much closer to the truth than anything you said before", Noel notes. Aria looks down to the ground. "Why wouldn't you go out on a date with me?" Noel asks. But he doesn't sound a bit angry. Still disappointed, but not angry.

But Aria doesn't answer. "Is it because of me? Or would you go out with someone else?", Noel asks. He doesn't ask her this because he really thinks that she doesn't like him at all but because he suspects that there is only one man she is really interested in.

Aria shakes her head. "Ok, I admit it. I wouldn't want to go out with you or anyone else because I simply don't have any interest in any man other than Jason, ok? Is that what you want to hear from me?", she hisses at him.

Satisfied with this answer, Noel looks at her. "Whose idea was it that you are just friends?" Noel asks, although he can easily answer the question himself. "His", Aria replies monotonously.

"He doesn't deserve you", Noel says suddenly. "You don't know him", Aria says. Noel only nods because he has actually expected this answer and knows that it is futile to discuss with her.

"I'm willing to offer myself if you want to make him jealous", he replies instead. Aria immediately starts laughing heartily. But she knows she will never take advantage of him and she will never agree to this offer. Even if the thought of making Jason jealous has already occurred to her. It wouldn't be fair to use Noel's feelings.

"So, are we friends?" Noel asks. It is really important to him to resolve their differences of the last few weeks. He knows that he doesn't have a chance to be with Aria now, even if it is still difficult for her to admit it.

Aria nods in agreement. "Sure", she says approvingly, and takes a step towards him to embrace him with gratitude. "If you take into account how hard he punched me, the wait might even be worth it and he can tell you that he is also in love with you", he whispers in her ear.

* * *

He knows he was cowardly. He still is.

Jason knows that it was cowardly to just run away and not to answer her questions. But his fear was too big. He is afraid of her reaction and he is afraid to be confronted with his own rage at himself.

They had sat together in his car, and she had begged him to stay with her and not go to the party to question Noel.

He was able to keep the first part of his promise. But he had gone to the party and for her it probably looks as if he hadn't kept his promise. As if he had just let her leave his car and turned around to knock Noel out.

He couldn't face her. He didn't want to see the disappointment about his behavior in her eyes. That's why he has stuffed a few clothes in a travel bag in the morning, got into his car and just started off. Without a destination. He just wanted to be far away.

Sometimes he'd spent the nights in his car. Sometimes he had looked for some cheap motel. Often, he was accompanied by a bottle of alcohol.

Again and again, her face appeared in his thoughts and he hoped that he could just turn back time. He knew he'd disappointed her. He's sure she's mad at him.

She probably doesn't want to see him again. Of course, she is disappointed in him. Just like all the other people who have just dropped him.

He immediately turned off his mobile phone when he crossed the city limits. He couldn't bear to hear her angry voice.

But now he sits on the edge of the street, next to his car, which is smoking from the engine compartment. Far and wide only fields and meadows. No house. No other car. No other human.

He has no idea how far it will be until he meets the next person, and he has little to drink. It would be too much of a risk to walk the way.

This is the reason why he takes his mobile phone out of the side pocket of his travel bag and switches it on.

Surprisingly, he actually gets a signal and after a short time his display shows all the missed calls and messages.

43 unread messages. _22 were sent by her._

36 missed calls. _16 times she called him._

Suddenly Jason notices how his fingers tremble and he perceives the unstoppable beating of his heart.

For days he has ignored her, but now he hears every single message and reads every word that she has written to him.

He expected Aria to scream into the phone. He expected that she could hardly speak anymore because she would have been so angry at him. He thought that she reproached him and that she immediately drew her own conclusions from what she knew.

But instead, she pleaded with him with a trembling voice to finally call her because she is so worried about him. She begged him to come home so they can talk about what happened. And she hopes so much that he is doing well. With these words she ended each message.

Without hesitating another moment, he finally writes her the relieving message and sends it.

 _I'm fine. Don_ _'_ _t worry._

 **I wanted to portray Noel in a different way more like he was at the beginning of the series. Jason will be back in the next chapter. Don't worry. What do you think? How Aria and Jason should meet again. Please tell me! :)**


	16. Chapter 16

Immediately, Aria forgets to breathe when she sees him standing in a very short distance. Two days ago, she has read his relieving message while tears were running down her cheeks.

Now he is only a few steps away from her. She didn't even know he is back. And she doesn't know if she's allowed to be mad at him because he didn't tell her.

In fact, she knows that she can't claim to be constantly aware of his whereabouts. But she thought they are friends ...

Besides, he knows how worried Aria was about him. He should have known that she is interested in knowing that he's back in Rosewood.

But that's exactly what his shameful look says when his eyes meet hers and he sees her confused look.

As much as she appreciates Spencer as her friend, so much does she curse her presence now since her presence keeps her from just running to him and talking to him.

 _Because of Spencer and because she went weak at the knees when she saw him._

Just a few steps away from her, he just dribbled the ball around the square and tried to throw the basketball into the basket as if nothing had happened. As if he had come to play at this place like he did every other day before. Except that he didn't do that for nine days and that he disappeared off the face of the earth.

"Risen from the drunk", Spencer says contemptuously beside her as she follows Aria's gaze. "Poor Ali, she would surely have preferred, he just stayed away. Then she wouldn't have to justify herself for him anymore", she adds, thinking she's telling the truth.

 _If you only know._ Aria still remembers when Alison's voice cracked and tears overflowed her reddened eyes.

Aria forces herself to avert her gaze from Jason and to follow her friend along the path. But a small part of her is just too disappointed in him as well and she doesn't want to talk to him right now.

 **Do we want to meet at our lake in an hour? J**

 _Our lake._ Aria can't help but smile as she reads his words. She feels stupid and hopelessly romantic that she interprets so much in his words. But the idea that he considers this place as their common place makes the butterflies in her belly whirl inexorably.

 **Ok.**

Despite everything, Aria can't bring herself to answer more than that. She's hurt. She expected him to call her when he is back in town and she thought that he wants to explain everything to her. But instead she just met him unprepared.

* * *

Again and again, she reads his message as she sits waiting impatiently at their lake and looks at the water, which sparkles in the sun. Nervously, she plays with the grass between her legs.

A few moments later she can hear how his tentative steps are pushing the grass to the ground behind her. Instantly, she turns her head to him. Aria holds her breath audibly when she sees Jason standing in front of her. It almost sounds like a sob.

While she just sat at the lake and waited for him, she has gone through several versions of their reunion in her mind. She wanted to remain cool and wait for what he has to say. She wanted to show him that she expects an explanation from him. For a moment, she also considered pretending that his absence had not bothered her at all.

But then it occurred to her that she had written him countless messages and left as many on the mailbox and that she would make a fool of herself with this statement.

All her thoughts and plans are shattered anyway, the moment he stands in front of her. Instead of remaining cool and distant, she wraps her arms around his torso and presses her cheek against his trained chest.

Overwhelmed and surprised by this reaction, Jason staggers backwards a few steps because of the sudden weight against his body.

Even though he has heard the concern in her voice with every single message on his mailbox, he didn't expect her to fall into his arms when they meet again.

Comfortingly and protectively, he puts his warm hands on her back and presses her a little closer against his body. For a few moments they just stand there and hold each other. Neither of them says a word.

As Aria slowly releases herself from the embrace, Jason resists the urge to stop her and pull her back into his arms. As much as he wants to deny it, he missed her incredibly. And to hold her in his arms releases the tension that was just controlling him and keeping control of every muscle in his body. But immediately he gets nervous again because he fears she's mad at him.

Unobtrusively, Aria strokes a tear from the corner of her eye as she averts her gaze from him to regain her composure.

"Do we want to sit down?" Aria asks, pointing to the blanket she had already laid out on the ground and where she was sitting as she was waiting for him. Jason nods silently.

For a few moments Aria waits as they sit side by side on the blanket. She waits to see if he will start telling or even say anything at all without her request. But Jason is at a loss for words. He doesn't know what to say to her and he doesn't know what she wants to know.

"What happened that night?" Aria finally asks because she knows he won't say anything. "I went to the party and punched Noel", Jason replies without thinking. And Aria wonders if he's doing this on purpose or if he's really thinking that way about what happened that night.

She wonders whether he actually thinks that Ian, Noel and the alcohol doesn't play any major role in this story and that it has been all just his decisions and his fault.

"That's not the whole story. Tell me everything. I finally want to hear from you what happened that night", Aria asks him. The way she is looking at him, shows exactly that. Aria hasn't formed an opinion on him yet. But she demands an explanation. The way she is looking at him lets him hope that he still has the chance to tell her the truth.

"I dropped you off and really wanted to go to Noel's party right away to punch him for the games he played with you", Jason begins to tell her quietly.

"But I didn't do it because I promised you I wouldn't and I actually knew it wasn't a good idea. But I really had to force myself to keep the steering wheel straight, Aria. You have no idea how much", Jason says sighing.

Jason doesn't have to fool himself. When he was driving his car and he felt the anger risen in him, he knew it wasn't just about defending Aria. He also knows that he has had a hard time controlling his emotions. The negative as well as the actually positive ...

And it wasn't just the anger at Noel that dominated him. He was also mad at himself because it bothered him so much to see Aria so depressed and powerless. His feelings have gone crazy with him and he didn't want all that. That's another reason why he would have liked to release his anger on someone and Noel would have been a desirable victim to him.

"The closer I got to my house, the more tired I was. I really just wanted to go to bed and sleep, but when I got there, Ian sat on my porch", Jason says sighing.

"He somehow persuaded me. I have no idea how he did it", Jason says cryptically. In fact, Jason still knows what let him grab the beer bottle. Ian has made it clear to him that he has changed since he is spending time with Aria and he was and still isn't sure whether he likes this change and whether he wants it.

"He brought beer", Jason says giving Aria a scrutinizing look. But Aria says nothing and waits for him to continue his story. "When all the bottles were empty, Ian said he knows where we can find supplies and without me knowing, we went to Noel's party."

Aria finally knows how the story started. So far, she had just heard that Ian and Jason showed up together at Noel's party. But only now does she know why Ian was there at all and that Jason didn't consciously go to the party.

"Ian instantly flirted with a girl and I went straight out into the garden. I thought I could just spend time there and have my peace", Jason explains. "But then Noel suddenly stood in front of me and provoked me." Again, Jason observes Aria. Again, she says nothing.

"I lost control at some point. I wanted to go, but he said things that just ... have nothing to do with the truth", he says looking her straight in her eyes. "I didn't think anymore and hit him."

Aria can hear the disgust for his behavior in his voice. "I'm rarely the one, who hits other people", Jason says silently. "Mostly it's me who just endures the punches. The one, who let others beat the shit out of me. But I was just blinded by rage", says Jason sighing.

"I'm sorry", he adds softly. "Why did you drive away?" She asks. For Aria, the story doesn't end with the moment Jason hit Noel. She also wants to know why he just drove away afterwards and didn't tell her what happened.

"I was mad at myself and I didn't want to face you because I knew you were mad at me, too." "I wasn't mad. I didn't know what happened", Aria says quickly.

"But after everything you knew, I was sure you were mad at me for doing exactly what you didn't want me to do", Jason says, justifying his behavior.

"No, you didn't tell me. I didn't know your version of the story and that's the one that was most important to me to hear", Aria says energetically. "I was so worried about you, Jason", Aria says actually sounding reproachful.

"I was really afraid that you would do something really stupid", she whispers, her voice shaking slightly. Without saying a word, Jason looks at her. The entire nine days they didn't see each other, he firmly believed she must have been mad at him.

That's the only reason he left Rosewood. Because of her and because he couldn't bear the looks of the other people in this town this time. And that's the only reason he turned off his mobile phone. That's why he didn't contact her when he was back in town.

"If at all, I was just mad at you for not answering my messages", Aria confesses softly. "Not even when you were already back in town", she adds. Jason looks ashamed to the ground. He misjudged the situation and now he regrets that he didn't go to Aria and told her what happened.

"Did you talk to Ali?", Aria asks and Jason looks at her in surprise. "Just briefly. Why?" He asks irritated. "What did she say?" Aria asks curiously. "She was pretty angry and just said it would have been nice if I had answered at least once and then she slammed the door and disappeared in her room", Jason says.

Aria sighs and can't suppress a smile. Jason still looks at her questioningly. "That was her way of telling you what fears she has endured", Aria tells him. "Ali acted differently all the days you weren't in town. She was staring at her mobile phone all the time and she looked totally absent and she ... cried ... often I think so", Aria says as she remembers Alison's permanently red-eyed eyes.

Jason buries his face in his hands. "I thought I would do you a favor if I disappear", he mumbles but still so clearly that Aria can understand him. Exhausted, he lets himself fall back and lays onto the blanket.

"Running away is rarely a good idea", Aria replies and also lays down on the blanket. "I know", Jason says sighing. "Maybe you should talk to Ali again", Aria suggests, supporting herself on her forearm and looking at him intently. Jason nods. "Yes, I will."

Suddenly Jason puts his arm around Aria and pulls her close to his body. Relaxed, he doesn't move, as she puts her head on his chest although his behavior confuses her a lot. Enjoying, Aria closes her eyes as his body heat streams against hers.

Jason didn't think about it when he put his arm around her. Not even when she's in his arms, does he realize that she's unusually close to him considering he insisted on the limits of friendship.

All he just realizes is how perfect she fits into his arms and how comfortable he feels about keeping her there. He closes his eyes relaxed.

For quite a while, Jason and Aria just lay entwined on the blanket in the grass and enjoy the closeness of the other. Aria is struggling with herself because she isn't sure whether she really wants to interrupt this moment. But she feels that right now is the right moment to get an honest answer from Jason.

"Jason?" She asks because she isn't sure if he is still awake at all. "Mhh?" Jason murmurs. "Who is Cece?"

Suddenly Jason's eyes are open. "Cece?" He repeats the name as if he's not sure if he just imagined Aria was asking him about her. "Yes, I met her. A few times. And she told me that you two were dating", Aria says.

"Well, then you know the answer. She's my ex-girlfriend", Jason replies and Aria regrets asking him about her. She feels that his voice is cold and his body is suddenly tense.

"I'm sorry, I didn't want to be nosily", Aria replies quickly. Jason rubs his palm over his face. His answer was harsh without him wanting it. "What do you want to know?" He asks.

"I was wondering what you liked about her", Aria says quietly without looking at Jason. Jason laughs softly. "Didn't you notice what a good heart she has?" Jason replies sarcastically.

Aria doesn't answer. Not because it wasn't a serious question, but because she noticed something very different about Cece, which intimidates her a lot more. Her long legs, the shiny blond curls and her feminine body. There isn't much resemblance between Aria and Cece and if Jason liked her, Aria doubts that she's even Jason's type.

"I was blind to see her real character. She flirted with me and I felt flattered by her advances. It cannot be denied that she is beautiful and she knew how to use her attractiveness. She probably still knows that. That's all. As stupid as it sounds, but sometimes you don't need more to get a man's attention", Jason says looking ashamed at Aria.

"But you were a couple, weren't you? So there had to be more than that?", Aria asks incredulously. "No and that's the reason why we didn't spend a long time together. At some point, even the prettiest looks can't disguise the nasty character", Jason replies.

Suddenly he seems thoughtful. "If I could turn back time, I'd have turned her down immediately. Not even because of me. But because of Ali. I think it has gotten a lot worse with Ali since she met Cece. She is an expert in the field of manipulation", says Jason contemptuously.

For a few moments he looks thoughtful. Jason doesn't even notice how Aria watches him attentively. For Aria, it's becoming increasingly obvious how much Jason cares about his sister, even though everyone thinks he cares about nothing and no one.

"Did you break it off?", Aria asks again curious. "No. Actually, none of us really broke up", Jason replies. What is that supposed to mean? Aren't they separated? The seconds until Jason continues, seem endless to Aria.

"Ali disappeared for one night. She didn't say where she went and in the morning she was still not at home", Jason says.

"I was worried sick but Cece thought that my reaction is exaggerated. She kept telling me to relax and not to make a drama out of it. She probably didn't get the attention she wanted and was annoyed all evening. I finally threw her out of the house", Jason says. But Aria just looks at him incredulously.

"We just never talked to each other after that. She seemed to have no interest and it was fine by me as well. The evening really opened my eyes. She never really cared about me."

Aria can hardly believe what Jason has just told her. How could Cece have so little understanding of a brother's concern for his sister? But before she can answer, Jason starts talking again.

"But I don't want to be a hypocrite and claim that I was really interested in her thoughts and feelings. As I said, her physical appeal was everything I really liked about her", he confesses honestly.

Aria laughs softly. It's hard to believe that Jason once was so superficial. "Maybe that explains why guys never really were interested in me and I should change my strategy a bit", she says laughing.

"Come on", Jason replies horrified. "You don't really think like that, do you?" He asks, laughing. "What?" Aria replies unknowingly what he means. But suddenly Jason hesitates. "That there was never anyone who was interested in you", he murmurs and can't look her in the eyes.

He knows there was someone ... there is someone who keeps wondering if Aria is more than his best friend. And he doesn't doubt that there were other men before him and there will be men after him, probably even at the moment, who are interested in her.

These thoughts scare him in such different ways. He is afraid that he will miss his chance. He is afraid that she is the one who really makes him happy and he just lets her pass by.

But on the other hand, he is too afraid of these feelings and of allowing himself to feel that way for Aria. He is far too afraid of being disappointed and hurt by love.

"Whether or not, no one has ever told me", Aria says convinced. "Surely, they were just too shy ... or had other reasons", Jason answers silently. It didn't even sound as if he had actually said those words to her, but rather muttered to himself.

Therefore, Aria knows that he wouldn't answer her when she asks him what he meant by these words. Instead, Aria decides to provoke him a bit with other words.

"You see, I should change my strategy and be a bit more revealing", she suggests, trying to sound as serious as possible.

"Come on, you have much more to offer than that", Jason replies horrified. "Really?", Aria asks and tries to sound as if she is seriously doubting herself.

"Of course, you do", Jason mutters softly and looks away sheepishly. He knows that he got himself into a difficult situation. It's hard to convince her that she doesn't need to use her physical qualities without letting her realize how much Jason has already noticed each and every one of her good qualities himself.

"Of course, you're pretty", Jason says and he smiles slightly as he sees how Aria immediately blushes. "But you are so selfless and kindhearted. You are listening and you aren't judging. You're actually the complete opposite of Cece and that's a good thing. My greatest wish is for you to be happy", Jason says softly. "Because nobody deserves it as much as you do", he adds.

Aria isn't able to stop the smile that brightens her face. "Thank you", she whispers as tears burn in her eyes and she reaches for his hand, leaning intimately against his shoulder.

 **So what do you think? I took me quite a while to update and I'm sorry. Hope it will get better.**


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